Women have zero accountability towards men

Quote: Wizard

Forgive me if this is going off on a tangent, but everybody already knows that women control most marriages.

They do because they are relentless.
They never give in or give up. They
pound and pound until they get their
way. They eventually get us to surrender,
and then it's over. We just go along to
get along. And it's all about sex. They
know we want it more than they do.

Really sad..

Quote: Wizard

Forgive me if this is going off on a tangent, but everybody already knows that women control most marriages. However, I'd like to suggest to the women of America to let the men have at least some control over something. Like picking a parking space. If the man is driving, and there is plenty of parking, would it be too much to ask to just say nothing and let him pick one? Or must the men of the world be beaten down in every way possible?

That is probably one of the biggest argument starters of them all! Men will drive 30 yards further down to get an easier spot where you can pull in easier and ideally pull straight through so you lessen your chances of an accident pulling out. Women will spend any amount of time and effort to find the closest possible spot then take more time to worm a large SUV into a spot not fit for something 2/3 the size of their vehicle all to save a few steps.

Quote: AZDuffman

That is probably one of the biggest argument starters of them all! Men will drive 30 yards further down to get an easier spot where you can pull in easier and ideally pull straight through so you lessen your chances of an accident pulling out. Women will spend any amount of time and effort to find the closest possible spot then take more time to worm a large SUV into a spot not fit for something 2/3 the size of their vehicle all to save a few steps.

Hippies do this too.

"Omg you parked so far away, could you park any further?"

If I want to park in a spot with trash in it, one car taking up 6 inches of my spot and the other car with a tweaker inside about to light his crack pipe, then I'll park closer. But as long as I'm driving and it's my car....I'm willing to walk an extra 15 feet.

Quote: RS

Hippies do this too.

"Omg you parked so far away, could you park any further?"

If I want to park in a spot with trash in it, one car taking up 6 inches of my spot and the other car with a tweaker inside about to light his crack pipe, then I'll park closer. But as long as I'm driving and it's my car....I'm willing to walk an extra 15 feet.

I still remember it from the joke book I had in 6th grade:

"A pessimist is a person who thinks a woman can't fit a large car into a spot way too small and an optimist is a person who thinks she will not try."

It isn't just the parking spaces. Why do women have to find a way to disagree about everything? As Bob said, I think they do it not because they hold a differing point of view but to be disagreeable and exert their control. They know that we know that we'd rather acquiesce than fight for hours over something stupid.

Quote: Wizard

It isn't just the parking spaces. Why do women have to find a way to disagree about everything? As Bob said, I think they do it not because they hold a differing point of view but to be disagreeable and exert their control. They know that we know that we'd rather acquiesce than fight for hours over something stupid.

Then please explain why millions of women are in abusive relationships and never say a thing! For the people on this forum who endorse hard math, you sure like broad generalizations.

Quote: zoobrew

Then please explain why millions of women are in abusive relationships and never say a thing! For the people on this forum who endorse hard math, you sure like broad generalizations.

You would have to ask them. I don't understand it either. I've spent my whole life watching women go for jerks and stick with them. Of course these are just generalizations. It saves time.

Quote: Wizard

You would have to ask them. I don't understand it either. I've spent my whole life watching women go for jerks and stick with them. Of course these are just generalizations. It saves time.

As far as parking a car goes I will never lose this argument. I always park my car far from the entrance or if there's an end space close. I don't want to get my doors dinged and I don't mind the walk. My girlfriend at the time of my My Blackjack Story... thread, Lois, often might get dropped off at the front door of the casino while I would park the car and meet her inside, espically if it was cold or raining. We called this the "poodle entrance."

Same thing for leaving. I'd get the car, pull up to the entrance and she'd come out. We liked walking together, so once again, this was done if it was cold or raining.

Quote: Wizard

You would have to ask them. I don't understand it either. I've spent my whole life watching women go for jerks and stick with them. Of course these are just generalizations. It saves time.

IMHO it is because women have both a fear of the unknown and a dislike for being alone. A jerk is a known quantity, if a woman dumps a jerk then she has to start all over again. The next guy might be a bigger jerk. Then she knows if she dumps the jerk she has to go places alone. Women will simply not go to social gatherings alone. They will be (correctly) concerned that all the other women will be gabbing about how they are at the wedding or whatever alone.

It takes quite a bit for a woman to dump a guy if she has been seeing him for more than a year or so.

Quote: EvenBob

... We just go along to
get along. And it's all about sex. They
know we want it more than they do.

Really sad..

Quote: Wizard

...They know that we know that we'd rather acquiesce than fight for hours over something stupid.

I struggle to understand this. I know this is the most common opinion of men: that we don't care as much, we want sex more than they do, etc, etc.... and this is why we roll over and 'let' them win; to continue the sex having, ehem, I mean preserve the peace. I just don't get it though. Isn't sex just, sex? As a fellow man don't get me wrong, I do understand the joys... but for the mathematician in me, it's also about the numbers, risk vs. reward, etc.

I've built my life to be a very well rounded endeavor that has a tremendous amount of opportunities to offer to another. I don't need/require a woman in my life, and I certainly don't need one that attempts to control/manipulate me. If a female attempts to manipulate me by way of sex, I'll call her out on it straight to her face. This lets her know I'm well aware of what games she's playing and that I will not participate. Then, if it happens again, she's gone, and it's her loss. Honestly, regardless of looks, size, etc, how hard is it to get 'a girl' if you really want one? Have you guys seen online dating? While I could go off on a tangent for hours about the horrors of it, at the same time, it IS the best and easiest way of meeting new people ever invented thus far. You can hit up 100 new girls and go on a few dates the next week and have a new girlfriend within a month. WHY PUT UP WITH THE CURRENT ONE'S CRAP?

Now, I'm sure many of you may be saying "because she's my wife." Well, that's obviously a much tougher situation. Once you're over that hill, supposedly there's no turning back. I guess at that point it becomes an individualized case which each merit their own data gathering / conclusions. Perhaps my confusion is mostly towards those whom say these things and aren't married (Ace). To me, it's really not that hard of a situation to deal with. I'm talking about creating equals, not controlling women either. Early in the relationship you must show you're not willing to put up with their manipulative controlling bullshit. The bad ones will leave (or keep doing it and you'll leave) and the good one's won't do it in the first place or will see what they were doing was wrong. Win win.

Anyone who says men want more sex with women have never been with a women trying to get pregnant while she is ovulating.

Quote: Gabes22

Anyone who says men want more sex with women have never been with a women trying to get pregnant while she is ovulating.

Actually, that's true. I think the statements were being made "in general" though. My best friend married a year ago to a girl whom was turning 31 and clearly had baby fever. He claimed she couldn't get enough, until she got pregnant before they even got married. Not sure how the sex life is post baby / marriage because he's apparently not allowed to talk to / see me very often. This is my (former) best friend that I grew up next door to since we were 8.

Women ovulating (and wanting to have kids) have no sense of logic/reason/care for anyone other than their primal need to reproduce.

Quote: Romes

...Not sure how the sex life is post baby / marriage because he's apparently not allowed to talk to / see me very often. This is my (former) best friend that I grew up next door to since we were 8.

This phenomenon has been observed for a long time. In order for an insecure women to corral what she now considers her domain, territory, power, the first thing that has to go is any old friends that have been around longer than she. Count on it. If you haven't already, you will see the same behavior time and again.

I believe they are afraid of old friends confidentiality with the new spouse, afraid the friend may point out the faults of the nesting, weight gaining, aging woman. Conversely when a bride [or female] seeks advice, she will go strait to her girlfriends and discuss any intricate or intimate detail about you or your relationship. When you are not agreeing with your SA about something very important to you and can't come to an understanding, you must realize you aren't just negotiating with your SA, you are negotiating with her entire clutch of confidants.

This needs to be straitened out before documents are signed, there is no retrieving friends who will be shunned, after the fact.

Watch, you will see it. It is a technique used to congregate power and control, especially when in a relationship where a woman is willing to use sex as a tool to control a man. It is all about control.

Men and women, marry for different reasons.

Often this is true of the act of sex, as well.

I was advised when I was young that "the only trouble with women, is they don't think like men".

**ck, I must be having some kind of closet misogynist moment? I feel like I'm being dragged out of my cocoon. Thanks a lot Ace, everything was going along smoothly, keep this thread going much longer and many of us will need your services : ).

If my "cover" is blown, I am doomed.

Got to hand it to Ace, he has the #1 & #2 threads running right now. kudos

Quote: petroglyph

Men and women, marry for different reasons.

Often this is true of the act of sex, as well.

I was advised when I was young that "the only trouble with women, is they don't think like men".

**ck, I must be having some kind of closet misogynist moment? I feel like I'm being dragged out of my cocoon. Thanks a lot Ace, everything was going along smoothly, keep this thread going much longer and many of us will need your services : ).

If my "cover" is blown, I am doomed.

Got to hand it to Ace, he has the #1 & #2 threads running right now. kudos

I love creating my own client base LOL j/k
As I have stated along with EvenBob - a lot of animal species come together (no pun intended) to procreate then basically live separate lives - males with males, females with females -- seems that humans could take a cue from this as men and women are so different in their interests...

#1 and #2 threads (How in the world did you determine that?)

A friend of mine said something to me the other day...he said "My wife has no hobbies, she never has and, come to think of it, I do not really know any women that have hobbies or interests outside of "grabbing coffee/drinks with the girls"" (my friend has a few hobbies (although he has had to cut down since getting married as the funding for said hobbies is no longer there)

Do women actually have hobbies and interests outside of their friends/relationships? (females hereon excluded as gambling is an honorable hobby)

Quote: aceofspades

...Got to hand it to Ace, he has the #1 & #2 threads running right now. kudos

Quote:

#1 and #2 threads (How in the world did you determine that?)

Thread Posted By Date, Time Posts Views
USA Tipping and guilt tripping RS 04/20, 09:59 60 2,790
Women have zero... aceofspades 04/20, 09:58 215 5,116
School's "covered girl... petroglyph 04/20, 09:58 2 23
150 Years Today: Lincoln... Greasyjohn 04/20, 09:48 31 487
Strange question about... Kerkebet 04/20, 09:47 24 451
Revel Tall Dark and empty Boz 04/20, 09:34 11 571
Simple math problem Romes 04/20, 09:03 13 271
Hookers for Hillary pew 04/20, 08:40 2 64
1X2 Banco DJTeddyBear 04/20, 08:23 4 63
Two Dice Puzzle indignant99 04/20, 08:22 256 6,345
Mayweather Pacquoia Fight... mdh 04/20, 07:45 35 1,942

When I looked at the recent threads, it looks like 2-3 of them you originated? You are on a roll. : )

Quote: petroglyph

Thread Posted By Date, Time Posts Views
USA Tipping and guilt tripping RS 04/20, 09:59 60 2,790
Women have zero... aceofspades 04/20, 09:58 215 5,116
School's "covered girl... petroglyph 04/20, 09:58 2 23
150 Years Today: Lincoln... Greasyjohn 04/20, 09:48 31 487
Strange question about... Kerkebet 04/20, 09:47 24 451
Revel Tall Dark and empty Boz 04/20, 09:34 11 571
Simple math problem Romes 04/20, 09:03 13 271
Hookers for Hillary pew 04/20, 08:40 2 64
1X2 Banco DJTeddyBear 04/20, 08:23 4 63
Two Dice Puzzle indignant99 04/20, 08:22 256 6,345
Mayweather Pacquoia Fight... mdh 04/20, 07:45 35 1,942

When I looked at the recent threads, it looks like 2-3 of them you originated? You are on a roll. : )

Haha - I hope my TR beginning tomorrow holds some interest :)

Are you really asking the question "Do women ACTUALLY have hobbies?" As a matter of fact, people have hobbies. I myself enjoy working out, running, riding my bike, fishing, crabbing, playing softball (only a few times a year unfortunately). I love playing Craps, sight seeing, traveling, going to professional hockey and baseball games, concerts of any sort, going to the movies, playing cards with family/friends, swimming... I could go on. Please let me know if this answers your question.

Quote: Crapsallday

Are you really asking the question "Do women ACTUALLY have hobbies?" As a matter of fact, people have hobbies. I myself enjoy working out, running, riding my bike, fishing, crabbing, playing softball (only a few times a year unfortunately). I love playing Craps, sight seeing, traveling, going to professional hockey and baseball games, concerts of any sort, going to the movies, playing cards with family/friends, swimming... I could go on. Please let me know if this answers your question.

I believe I said my friend remarked about it to me but now that you mention it, 99% of the women I know do not have hobbies
That is not to say I know a lot of women but most see their relationships (friends or b/f) as their full time lifestyle with not much room for anything else

Quote: aceofspades

.... but now that you mention it, 99% of the women I know do not have hobbies...

I always thought they LOVED doing dishes, laundry, vacuuming, etc., etc.

Most women I date tend to have the same hobby. Spending my money

Quote: aceofspades

As I have stated along with EvenBob - a lot of animal species come together (no pun intended) to procreate then basically live separate lives - males with males, females with females -- seems that humans could take a cue from this as men and women are so different in their interests...

#1 and #2 threads (How in the world did you determine that?)

Animal species do other things we might not want to emulate. How do you decide?

Anyway, I agree that people should set up a relationship which works for them rather than force themselves into a self-destructive one.

Quote:

Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.

-Katharine Hepburn

Quote: aceofspades

I believe I said my friend remarked about it to me but now that you mention it, 99% of the women I know do not have hobbies
That is not to say I know a lot of women but most see their relationships (friends or b/f) as their full time lifestyle with not much room for anything else

This is a fine line you're walkin ace =p, but that's something I learned from my 6 year relationship through college/etc. I came to realize after the relationship that she didn't really have any hobbies. Sure she rattled off that list when we were dating (traveling, running, fishing, etc, etc, etc)... but when we were dating for those 6 years she did little more than run, work, and do things with me on average. Not to say once or twice a year she didn't do some other hobby, but when guys (if I may speak for the gender here) say "hobbies" we more often refer to things done on a daily/weekly basis. If I say I'm in to 10 things, then there's a good chance I'll do all 10 of them at some point in any given week or so.

In my narrow experiences of dating, I've found that a good majority (75%?) of women don't actually have very many hobbies either. It's astounds me every time I ask this now "required" question on a first/second date... If they don't give me any active hobbies/answers I find I end up saying "Well what hobbies have you actually done in the past month?" This I find separates the BS'ers (saying they have 100 hobbies, but they only do them once a year or two) and the people with what I'm looking for and refer to as "real" hobbies that you're actively engaged in doing daily/weekly/etc.

Now that you mention it, I actually love organizing and cleaning !!

Quote: Crapsallday

Now that you mention it, I actually love organizing and cleaning !!

But did you do both of them in the past week? LOL =)

My wife is different than the norm maybe. At least the norm represented here, it would seem.

She always worked out and was a body builder at one time. The back surgeries and hip replacements have curtailed that drastically. But she still goes to the gym regularly, she just can't lift much anymore. She does manage to stay in shape. I have to remind her to take it easy or she would overdo it all the time.
She also does yoga regularly as do I, semi regularly. She works in the yard all the time and babysits the Grand Kids when they need a baby sitter.

Hell, the only thing that we do together Is travel. I have my motorcycles and my old truck. I do my thing and she does hers. It seems to work better if we don't spend every minute with each other. I always wonder about couples who you always see together. They really either genuinely like each other or they're so insecure that they can't stand being apart. Some of them are obviously the second choice.

Quote: Romes

This is a fine line you're walkin ace =p, but that's something I learned from my 6 year relationship through college/etc. I came to realize after the relationship that she didn't really have any hobbies. Sure she rattled off that list when we were dating (traveling, running, fishing, etc, etc, etc)... but when we were dating for those 6 years she did little more than run, work, and do things with me on average. Not to say once or twice a year she didn't do some other hobby, but when guys (if I may speak for the gender here) say "hobbies" we more often refer to things done on a daily/weekly basis. If I say I'm in to 10 things, then there's a good chance I'll do all 10 of them at some point in any given week or so.

In my narrow experiences of dating, I've found that a good majority (75%?) of women don't actually have very many hobbies either. It's astounds me every time I ask this now "required" question on a first/second date... If they don't give me any active hobbies/answers I find I end up saying "Well what hobbies have you actually done in the past month?" This I find separates the BS'ers (saying they have 100 hobbies, but they only do them once a year or two) and the people with what I'm looking for and refer to as "real" hobbies that you're actively engaged in doing daily/weekly/etc.

Ok you got me! In the past month I haven't fished or went crabbing because the weather has been terrible. But I ran, rode my bike and worked out yesterday. Played cards over the weekend. Went for a walk etc. It's sad if people can not actually name at least hobby.

Quote: rxwine

Animal species do other things we might not want to emulate. How do you decide?

Anyway, I agree that people should set up a relationship which works for them rather than force themselves into a self-destructive one.

Quote:

Quote:

Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.

-Katharine Hepburn

Kate had it right. Ideally, a duplex with an interior door, like a hotel suite. Both have their own space, and see each other when it's mutually agreeable. The couple has to have a fair amount of money to live that way, though, as they miss out on most of the financial advantages of keeping house together.

FWIW, my hobbies. Gem collecting and setting, reading, writing Java, gambling, family/board games, party bridge, sailing/canoeing/snorkling, art collecting, repurposing, volunteering here and there. Past hobbies; too numerous to list without reader boredom, but usually related to spending time in common interests with other people. Some things are better as solitary pursuits, others as activities with SO or groups of friends. Depends on what you want from your hobbies and interests, as well as the amount of discretionary cash you have to pursue them. So flying (I have a Private license), SCUBA (air card), golf (nice set of clubs rusting), tennis, NASCAR attendance, coin collecting, all pretty much fell by the wayside when I retired, both for finance and age. Target shooting, rock climbing, whitewater rafting, competition bridge, remodeling houses, several others were in conjunction with an SO or my ex, so dropped away from them with the end of the relationship.

Never was much for shopping, lady-lunching, bar-hopping, or hen parties, and neither were most of my lady-friends, but I think we were either a minority, or there's a very distorted perception of what women actually spend their time doing (I think the latter, but certainly there are many women who do fit the stereotype.) Not having children, I think, makes a great difference in a woman's hobbies; they tend to revolve around other family women and their kids' activities during at least a couple decades.

This is my personal observation, from an entirely heterosexual man, the reverse probably holds true for others.

What I think hobbies equate to is passion. If you find that your would be partner in life is not interested in anything enough to make it their "hobby", I firmly believe that person is without passion. I don't care what it is, but something. Dancing, golfing, bowling, birdwatching, something that drives us each to do more than just eat and ***t.

Passion of course can be sex, but when guys talk about hobbies, i.e, fishing, hunting, off roading, they are actually talking about things they are "passionate" about.

So, if you are a guy looking for a partner, imo, you want one that cares enough about something, anything enough, to do it on their own, with you or without you. Something that will nourish her spirit it you are gone, everybody in this world needs to be passionate enough about something, enough to get out of bed for, enough to lose sleep for. That very same passion will transfer into the bedroom, it is evidence of primordial instincts that runs in our veins.

When we get to the stage in life where nothing matters enough, when nothing matters more than food or sleep, nothing we would be willing to bleed for, imo it is time to get on the ice flowing out to sea, and quit taking up the resources of the village.

That thing, whatever it is, can also change, it is only passion manifesting itself, physically.

Quote: Wizard

I think they do it not because they hold a differing point of view but to be disagreeable and exert their control.

Many women seem to be in a bad mood
a lot, where men are more easy going.
Also, husbands and boyfriends are often
the only people women can act like
themselves around. Selfish, petty, bad
mood, nagging. They certainly can't act
that way around their friends or siblings
or co-workers. So we get the brunt of it all.

There was a funny Everybody Loves Raymond
where his wife was going crazy on him, screaming
and name calling. The phone rings and it's
her friend and she's instantly a different person.
Calm and sweet and nice. My wife would never
act around her sisters like she acts around me
sometimes. She cares what they think of her,
and could care less what I think.

That's it, isn't it. They have little respect for men
and can't even bother to act nice half the time.

Quote: EvenBob

... even bother to act nice half the time.

Well, there's the thing right there. It is just an act. Everybody is acting and everyone lies, gets gas, smells sometimes and occasionally has needs.

We just appear to be the most advanced specie.

Quote: EvenBob

Many women seem to be in a bad mood
a lot, where men are more easy going.
Also, husbands and boyfriends are often
the only people women can act like
themselves around. Selfish, petty, bad
mood, nagging. They certainly can't act
that way around their friends or siblings
or co-workers. So we get the brunt of it all.

There was a funny Everybody Loves Raymond
where his wife was going crazy on him, screaming
and name calling. The phone rings and it's
her friend and she's instantly a different person.
Calm and sweet and nice. My wife would never
act around her sisters like she acts around me
sometimes. She cares what they think of her,
and could care less what I think.

That's it, isn't it. They have little respect for men
and can't even bother to act nice half the time.

I live my life the opposite way. Those I love are deserving of my best manners and respect, not my worst. Can't speak for other women, but neither should you.

Quote: beachbumbabs

I live my life the opposite way. Those I love are deserving of my best manners and respect, not my worst. Can't speak for other women, but neither should you.

Are you married?

I think Bob was talking about the average married couple after the honeymoon stage and after a certain age.

Quote: petroglyph

This is my personal observation, from an entirely heterosexual man, the reverse probably holds true for others.

What I think hobbies equate to is passion. If you find that your would be partner in life is not interested in anything enough to make it their "hobby", I firmly believe that person is without passion. I don't care what it is, but something. Dancing, golfing, bowling, birdwatching, something that drives us each to do more than just eat and ***t.

Passion of course can be sex, but when guys talk about hobbies, i.e, fishing, hunting, off roading, they are actually talking about things they are "passionate" about.

So, if you are a guy looking for a partner, imo, you want one that cares enough about something, anything enough, to do it on their own, with you or without you. Something that will nourish her spirit it you are gone, everybody in this world needs to be passionate enough about something, enough to get out of bed for, enough to lose sleep for. That very same passion will transfer into the bedroom, it is evidence of primordial instincts that runs in our veins.

When we get to the stage in life where nothing matters enough, when nothing matters more than food or sleep, nothing we would be willing to bleed for, imo it is time to get on the ice flowing out to sea, and quit taking up the resources of the village.

That thing, whatever it is, can also change, it is only passion manifesting itself, physically.

Yes, passion...that is what hobbies should be read as -- be passionate about an endeavour in your life

Quote: EvenBob

Many women seem to be in a bad mood
a lot, where men are more easy going.
Also, husbands and boyfriends are often
the only people women can act like
themselves around. Selfish, petty, bad
mood, nagging. They certainly can't act
that way around their friends or siblings
or co-workers. So we get the brunt of it all.

There was a funny Everybody Loves Raymond
where his wife was going crazy on him, screaming
and name calling. The phone rings and it's
her friend and she's instantly a different person.
Calm and sweet and nice. My wife would never
act around her sisters like she acts around me
sometimes. She cares what they think of her,
and could care less what I think.

That's it, isn't it. They have little respect for men
and can't even bother to act nice half the time.

I used to play in a band when I lived in California and the bass player in the band (at the time he was 34) was dating an 18-year old girl.
Said girl would always complain that she was "tired"
My friend would then exclaim - you are 18 years old, you live with you rparents who pay all your bills and put gas in your car, you go to community college taking 10 credits, and you sleep about 12 hours a day - HOW THE F^&* ARE YOU TIRED?

Quote: AxelWolf

Are you married?

I think Bob was talking about the average married couple after the honeymoon stage and after a certain age.

I was married for 10 years. I disagree that the "average" married couple treat each other like that. Those attitudes grow out of mutual scorn, disappointment in each other, or misplaced anger. The average married couple don't do that to each other, but the married couple headed for divorce or in serious trouble do. Why EB would stay, or his wife stay, in such a dysfunctional, unhappy relationship is up to him; either fix it or leave it. And fixing it would start with mutual respect, even admiration, and good manners towards the other.

Quote: petroglyph

What I think hobbies equate to is passion. If you find that your would be partner in life is not interested in anything enough to make it their "hobby", I firmly believe that person is without passion. I don't care what it is, but something. Dancing, golfing, bowling, birdwatching, something that drives us each to do more than just eat and ***t.

Passion of course can be sex, but when guys talk about hobbies, i.e, fishing, hunting, off roading, they are actually talking about things they are "passionate" about...

Yes, yes, and yes... Passion is by far the correct word for what I was trying to refer to as well and you couldn't have said it any better! I've actually said this before to friends when talking about the same subject: "I don't care if you're passionate about collection spoons, just be passionate about something!"

Quote: beachbumbabs

...Can't speak for other women,

I think you can.

There is a delineation between, girls, babes, chicks etc. and "women". Or as otherwise known by discerning men, "the kind".

I am remarried and in a previous occasion my previous spouse accosted my best friend and tells him "Petro hates women". My friend responded in what I consider classic fashion when he said, "how would he know, she [my current wife] is the first one he has ever met.

After meeting personally what might be my first "real woman", I find I really respect and admire them. Someone else to has risen above life's struggles.

Women are the beauty in our lives. They make the difference in an otherwise bland existence, just searching for our next meal and dry place to sleep. I had pretty plain, beige walls, without decor. My SO made the place presentable for the world to see, without the need for "credit", only adorning my life as she thinks I deserve.

I dressed appropriate for the task at hand, I now dress well, and it matters. I shave more often, I care. She, in her beauty, is my reason for being. And she is why it occurs to me to be grateful. She makes me a better man.

We tend to find what we are looking for if we look hard enough, good luck out there, it is a jungle.

Quote: beachbumbabs

I live my life the opposite way. Those I love are deserving of my best manners and respect, not my worst. .

You just said exactly what I was saying.
Women don't love and respect their husbands
for the most part, so they treat them like
crap.

Quote: beachbumbabs

Why EB would stay, or his wife stay, in such a dysfunctional, unhappy relationship is up to him; either fix it or leave it.

For what, a carbon copy of the
same thing? I've known lots
and lots of married couples,
mostly from being in the antique
business. For every rogue happy
couple I saw, there were a dozen
who who were not. Or more.

With all the couples I know now,
the only 'happy' ones are really
young, nephews and nieces in
their 20's. But that's because all
the men are whipped and the girls
run the whole show. So the guys
do whatever she demands because
he knows whats coming if he doesn't.

Quote: aceofspades

A friend of mine said something to me the other day...he said "My wife has no hobbies, she never has and, come to think of it, I do not really know any women that have hobbies or interests outside of "grabbing coffee/drinks with the girls"" (my friend has a few hobbies (although he has had to cut down since getting married as the funding for said hobbies is no longer there)

Do women actually have hobbies and interests outside of their friends/relationships? (females hereon excluded as gambling is an honorable hobby)

Women love to shop, especially for status symbols. And, this is universal for most (obviously not all, there are alway exceptions) Women.

Women need to feel like they are well provided for. This is why they can spend hours (and thousands of your dollars) buying shoes and bags that they will maybe use once on their life. But the act of being able to buy the status symbols is more important than ever using them. Women care much more about their social "face" than men and their main hobbies usually involve building and maintaining It.

Men care to some degree though their way to prove themselves usually requires far less money (fights, sporting events, shouting matches, etc....) whereas women need external products to prove their status.

So it's probably fair to say women's main hobbies involve being social (drink coffee, ect, as mentioned) and shopping.

Quote: petroglyph

I think you can.

There is a delineation between, girls, babes, chicks etc. and "women". Or as otherwise known by discerning men, "the kind".

I am remarried and in a previous occasion my previous spouse accosted my best friend and tells him "Petro hates women". My friend responded in what I consider classic fashion when he said, "how would he know, she [my current wife] is the first one he has ever met.

After meeting personally what might be my first "real woman", I find I really respect and admire them. Someone else to has risen above life's struggles.

Women are the beauty in our lives. They make the difference in an otherwise bland existence, just searching for our next meal and dry place to sleep. I had pretty plain, beige walls, without decor. My SO made the place presentable for the world to see, without the need for "credit", only adorning my life as she thinks I deserve.

I dressed appropriate for the task at hand, I now dress well, and it matters. I shave more often, I care. She, in her beauty, is my reason for being. And she is why it occurs to me to be grateful. She makes me a better man.

We tend to find what we are looking for if we look hard enough, good luck out there, it is a jungle.

This is one of the best posts ever on this site. Thanks, petro; really glad you and your wife find your bliss in each other.

Quote: beachbumbabs

I disagree that the "average" married couple treat each other like that.

I think the key is the quotation marks regarding 'average'.

On the Real Housewives of Anywhere, its all spend money and bicker all day and night. Some of that is ratings and some of that is probably how they actually live. Alot depends on what they've grown up to expect.

An acquaintance of mine told me of her experience buying a new tire. The clerk was all set to walk outside and see the size when she told him the size which prompted some sort of "most women don't know their tire size" and retort of "You have not met most women".

Many marriages are based upon mutual interests, not necessarily carbon copies of each other but certainly complementary personalities. A husband can race cars, his wife can race airplanes or one can be an artist in water colors and the other an artist in oils. I've posted about the young windsurfers who each took several months to surf the Columbia River while awaiting their California bar exam results. Similar personalities and interests right there and alot more mutual interests easily discovered on a relaxed first date.

I know one couple whose relationship started at a "mixer" with the woman saying we've each invested a great deal of time and energy in getting into graduate school, what do you say we simply take care of each others basic biological needs without any time wasting preliminaries. Three years later they were graduated from law school and married on the same day.

Some marriages seem to be more based on animal herds that lead separate lives except during mating season. Each day and night the separateness grows until its separate bedrooms as they realize they don't really have anything in common but a marriage license and some kids and alot of debt. Some stay out of fear of the frying pan, some stay out of financial fears and the possibility of making the same mistake again. Some leave.

Some women actually believe that life is a process of reading the tabloids, painting their nails and eating bon bon's until What'sHisName, the guy they picked from the Stag Line, comes home for dinner.

One young girl in a coffee shop had laid down the law on her boyfriends maniacal driving and habit of leaving a trail of crumbs on her rug. Immediately after the marriage, he seemed to have forgotten about that brake pedal and that plate for his pastry. And she decided to divorce him, not because of the crumbs per se, but because those crumbs revealed his lack of respect for her. His promises were to lure her into marriage, not a committment to an agreed upon life style. So she nipped it in the bud.
I think this is what was mean in that recently posted TED talk about the longest lasting relationships don't have much change, the partners have high standards and neither gives in.

Quote: FleaStiff

I think this is what was mean in that recently posted TED talk about the longest lasting relationships don't have much change, the partners have high standards and neither gives in.

I can't disagree with that statement more. I have been with the same woman for 50 years and I would say the secret is the exact opposite of the TED talk. For a relationship to last you spoil each other and each you 'give in' to each other all the time. Neither side never giving in will never create a long term relationship at anything from marriage to a business partnership.

The problem with many of the marriages today is that we have too many princess's who actually believed the Disney movies.

Quote: beachbumbabs

This is one of the best posts ever on this site. Thanks, petro; really glad you and your wife find your bliss in each other.

Thank you Barbara. When I saw this I realized what a hard time I have editing my own writing. : ) My brain is willing to make the same printing mistakes more than once.

Quote: kenarman

The problem with many of the marriages today is that we have too many princess's who actually believed the Disney movies.

What? You mean the "happy ever-aftering" isn't guaranteed, you actually have to settle down and work at ... real life?


By the way that TED talk defined long term relationship as six years, not 50, so perhaps Australian math is different.

Just consider how lucky some people are: In Saudi Arabia women don't even meet their husband after they have been married. In India one woman asked the groom a simple arithmetic question and her resulting declaration of not marrying an illiterate man caused the police to be called.

Quote: FleaStiff

I think the key is the quotation marks regarding 'average'.

On the Real Housewives of Anywhere, its all spend money and bicker all day and night. Some of that is ratings and some of that is probably how they actually live. Alot depends on what they've grown up to expect.

...

Flea,

Please don't take Real Housewives of Anywhere as even close to reality. Those women are cast for drama, paid to be on the show, told to start fights and say catty things, edited into absurdity. Women in general are NOT NOT NOT like that. Those ladies are completely superficial and raised to be spoiled princesses, and the men who put up with them deserve every tantrum and every piece of placating jewelry. In fact, the ones who are too dull and ordinary get fired from the shows; see Andy Cohen's blog.

Real Housewives being used to illustrate ANY point about women should be the gender equivalent of Godwin's Law.

That is all....

:)

Quote: petroglyph

Thank you Barbara. When I saw this I realized what a hard time I have editing my own writing. : ) My brain is willing to make the same printing mistakes more than once.

You, in fact, should show her what you wrote about her.

Quote: beachbumbabs

Real Housewives being used to illustrate ANY point about women should be the gender equivalent of Godwin's Law.

I had to resort to Wikipedia on that Godwin's Law.

As to any reality show, its cheap to produce but will only be profitable if it has ratings which means it has to be spiced up to the absurdity level. Real without "producer interference" will be cheap and devoid of ratings.