Mosca
Mosca
Joined: Dec 14, 2009
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August 14th, 2018 at 7:17:24 AM permalink
There was a young lady from Britain,
Who at a card table was sittin’


I dunno, I gotta get my day moving, it’s already 10AM here and I’ve wasted 3 hours screwing around.
NO KILL I
DogHand
DogHand
Joined: Sep 24, 2011
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Thanks for this post from:
JoemanMoscaRigondeauxCrystalMathodiousgambit
August 14th, 2018 at 7:26:36 AM permalink
Quote: Mosca

There was a young lady from Britain,
Who at a card table was sittin’


I dunno, I gotta get my day moving, it’s already 10AM here and I’ve wasted 3 hours screwing around.



Mosca,

How about this?

There was a young lady from Britain,
Who at a card table was sittin’
She did not know B.S.
So she just had to guess
Among splittin', standin', or hittin'.

Dog "Longfellow" Hand
Joeman
Joeman
Joined: Feb 21, 2014
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Mosca
August 14th, 2018 at 7:29:15 AM permalink
Quote: Mosca

There was a young lady from Britain,
Who at a card table was sittin’

She looked down to find there
A nice pocket pair,
And said, "That fishy's stack I'll be gettin'!"
"Dealer has 'rock'... Pay 'paper!'"
odiousgambit
odiousgambit
Joined: Nov 9, 2009
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Mosca
August 14th, 2018 at 7:35:39 AM permalink
Quote: Mosca

There was a young lady from Britain,
Who at a card table was sittin’


I dunno, I gotta get my day moving, it’s already 10AM here and I’ve wasted 3 hours screwing around.



There was a young lady from Britain,
Who at a card table was sittin’
cuz her face was so sad
[her luck ran really bad]
Everyone thought her knickers weren't fittin'

btw,
https://www.google.com/search?source=hp&ei=1-hyW6vrCubbjwTojInACw&q=british+slang+knickers&oq=british+slang+knickers&gs_l=psy-ab.13..0j0i22i30k1l2.2187.8440.0.10706.24.18.0.0.0.0.1072.1914.6-1j1.2.0....0...1.1.64.psy-ab..22.2.1913....0.MqCUkqJONXA
the next time Dame Fortune toys with your heart, your soul and your wallet, raise your glass and praise her thus: “Thanks for nothing, you cold-hearted, evil, damnable, nefarious, low-life, malicious monster from Hell!” She is, after all, stone deaf. ... Arnold Snyder
rxwine
rxwine
Joined: Feb 28, 2010
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RomesodiousgambitMosca
August 14th, 2018 at 9:13:03 AM permalink
There was a young lady from Britain,
Who at a card table was sittin’
She held the best pair
On the front of her chest
And it got all the dealer's attention.
Quasimodo? Does that name ring a bell?
Romes
Romes
Joined: Jul 22, 2014
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odiousgambitMosca
August 14th, 2018 at 9:25:52 AM permalink
There was a young lady from Britain,
Who at a card table was sittin'
She refused to big bet
Took a ton of house edge
And all of the ploppies were smitten
Playing it correctly means you've already won.
beachbumbabs
Administrator
beachbumbabs
Joined: May 21, 2013
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August 14th, 2018 at 10:16:24 AM permalink
This is fun, Mosca! Not to stop the first one, but here's another start to work with.

There was a young girl from Decatur
Who asked the casino to rate her
If the House lost every hand, they wouldn't deal the game.
Joeman
Joeman
Joined: Feb 21, 2014
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beachbumbabsCrystalMathRigondeauxMosca
August 14th, 2018 at 10:20:05 AM permalink
Quote: beachbumbabs

There was a young girl from Decatur
Who asked the casino to rate her

The boss said, "Let's see,
You look OK to me.
I'd say you're a seven or eighter."
"Dealer has 'rock'... Pay 'paper!'"
beachbumbabs
Administrator
beachbumbabs
Joined: May 21, 2013
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Thanks for this post from:
RomesCrystalMathodiousgambit
August 14th, 2018 at 10:20:11 AM permalink
Quote: Romes

There was a young lady from Britain,
Who at a card table was sittin'
She refused to big bet
Took a ton of house edge
And all of the ploppies were smitten



I like your last line. Steal!


There was a young lady from Britain,
Who at a card table was sittin'
Her spread was her legs
While chippies she begs
And all of the ploppies were smitten
If the House lost every hand, they wouldn't deal the game.
Ayecarumba
Ayecarumba
Joined: Nov 17, 2009
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Romesodiousgambit
August 14th, 2018 at 10:37:11 AM permalink
There was a young lady from Britain,
Who at a card table was sittin’
She meant to just call
But did lose it all
Motion counts, the Floor isn’t kiddin’
Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication - Leonardo da Vinci

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