Just don't ask!
OK. Lifetime bankroll still positive, but slaughtered by recent recreational play. One day, I'll republish the chart.
So, a week or so back credited online account with £275
Ground it up to £525 with online BJ
So far so good.
Today decided to throw £25 at a new online gaff to test it out. Lost that £25 while being unimpressed by its offering. No biggy. £25 is peanuts.
Returned to my regular gaff where that £525 was sat as credit.
Mugs game, decided to throw my £525 into a progressive to recover that lost 25.
Balance at £551
Had a couple or three of unmeasured Jack Daniels,
Recreational play is ok, but doesn't mix well with recreational drinking.
Fsking good job it's pocket change.
Yayyy. I doubled my money tonight
OK. This is not a serious post.
The last few month have seen my lifetime bankroll slaughtered, because I've been playing totally recreationally, but at rather higher stakes than I should. I do still have a comfortable life-time profit, but decided that I should tone back my recreational gambling.
So it was that I went to my local Bricks and Mortar tonight for the first time in a couple of months. My wallet had £100 and I took along a £1000 wad just in case the dealer got sloppy in my favour. Playing at this time in the evening (5pm) they put the rookie dealers on BlackJack.
So I ordered a snack and bought in with £50 at the £3 table.. . . . Actually at the only table. There was just one roulette wheel rolling and one BJ table on.
Played between 3 and 10 a hand, usually 5, expecting to lose that 50 before my food arrived. Bobbled about between about 30 and 75 and food arrived just as I found myself back at 50, so stopped briefly to eat.
Resumed, and ground my pile of chips up to £98, then to £101, but played on at £5 for a while to change out a few 1s that I'd accumulated. Stumbled back down to about £50.
Then the decisive hand of the night came up. There is always one:-
£10 wagered, get 66 v 5
Split, giving me £20 out there, get a 6 and a 5. Decided to stand the 6-6 (scaredy cat) and double the 6-5. So I have £30 out. Got a 4 on the 6-5
(If I'd resplit those 6's I'd have found myself doubling a 6-4 for another £10 and this would have been at least a +/- £50 proposition)
Dealer bust. whoop whoop +£30 rather than -£30
Played on another 30 minutes or so trying to grind back to £100. Eventually made it and coloured up my stack of £5s into one £100 chip.
Went to the cage with my one pathetic chip, cashed out and went home.
So, I'd doubled my single £50 buy in and had pretty much 3 hours amusement and two free coffees. Result!
$:o) Last of the high rollers!
Now compare and contrast with some of the other guys at the table playing all sorts of side bets and £25 wagers. I never saw them cash out anything.
Only two dealer errors of the night, he tried to take my £10 wager on a push and he paid out on another £5 push. I pulled him up on one and forgave the other.
One thing worthy of note. Three times the dealer tried to tell me that I was wrong to stand soft 19 against a ten. I won two of them and lost the third which I would have lost either way.
A Ploppy Freeroll Trip
OK. The Freeroll was mine: The ploppy was me. Here is the story, with a twist in the tail.
It all started when I received an email on Friday evening.
Subject: Important Information about [redacted]Casinos.com
You may have experienced some problems when trying to play at [redacted]Casinos.com recently. We’d like to apologise and let you know that we’ve added £20 to your cash balance as a gesture of goodwill.
Erm. Thanks. I hadn't noticed the problems as the account was pretty much dormant.
So, I logged in, and sure enough, I had £20 of cash credit, which I could just draw out and spend on a bottle of JD, if the mood took me.
But it was Friday night and I was just finishing a JD, so I figured what the heck. Fired up RNG blackjack with table min of £1
Played silly little 1,2,3,3,3 progressive for a while, never going below the initial £20 until I reached £50 balance. Had easily an hour of silly fun and here I was with £50 of free money. What the heck!
Went on a 10% per bet spree, wagering 10% of my rounded down bankroll on each hand. So, started at £5 per hand. I was bobbing around between about £30 at £3 per hand and £75 at £7 per hand. After about another 30 minutes, I was at £90 and so I switched back to a 1,2,3,3,3 progressive. Bingo! I stumbled up to £100.50
Now, I'd had nearly 2 hours of free play and I had £100.50 of free money. I was already visualising what I would treat myself to as I put in the cash-out request.
So far so good.
But Saturday night, I got bored, so step forth Mr Ploppy :o)
Cancelled the pending withdrawal and started playing again with 2,4,6,6 progressive.
Stumbled up to £120 and realised that I was being a completely degenerate knob. Requested cash-out again, this time for £120.
Still, I was feeling pretty happy. I had £120 of money on its way to my bank and was heart set on a little personal treat.
Sunday morning, step forth Oncedear the complete knob-head. I wonder if £150 would be achievable from that £120, so sure enough, I again cancelled the pending withdrawal.
What a stupid, stupid thing to do!!!
FFS I'd blown it all. This didn't feel like £20 of free money squandered. It felt like, and was indeed, a nice £120 treat flushed down the pan. I was angry with myself.
and then the insanity struck.
Freeroll be damned. I would chuck £50 of my own money in, which I did.
Flush: Bye bye my own £50.
But now comes the twist. The sickening twist.
I had £150 sat in my PayPal account that wasn't earmarked for anything. Lets see if I can use that to at least win my own £50 that I'd squandered. Transferred to my casino account.
Remember now, I'd taken £20 freeroll up to £120, then lost it, then dumped £50 of my own money and was now dumping another £150 of my own money.
This was all really rather stupid.
But good fortune prevailed for a little while, and soon I had turned my none-freeroll losses round: Balance reached the £200 that I had 'invested'
The only sensible thing to do now was to cash out and lick my wounds.
Did I hell. I played on. Doing a 5,10,15,15, 15 progressive.
Now here is the twist.
220 ( Yayy I was back to that free £20 situation)
300 ( Yayy I was back to being £100 up )
OMG. I was now back to being £120 up on the weekend. Requested cash-out.
I'm damned well going to put £200 back in my bank account and I'm spending that £120 on something of an undeserved treat.
But being £120 up on my own seed money was nowhere near as sweet as when I was first up £120 on my freeroll.
Oncedear, once again a lucky tit. A bigger tit than usual, and luckier than I deserved.
Outed Myself As A Counter
Recent session playing £5 per hand blackjack. 4 players at the table. CSM game with discard tray going up to about 2 decks.
A round came out with NO HIGH CARDS! No Tens or aces.
We all looked at each-other amazed and amused and I mumbled "Wow! after that hand . . . " as I pushed a massive £10 into the circle! Dealer says "Ah. A card counter eh?". I reply, "Yeah. As if that works :o)"
We both grinned.
Fact is, I'm known as a steady BS player, but at the stakes I play, I'm convinced they don't care one jot.
Still, I've taken the sum total of £870 from them over 15 sessions and 6 months.
Just luck and occasional recklessness: Not by counting.
Three Hours Of Fun
That's what I just had. Three hours of really amusing Blackjack, and it didn't break the bank.
I don't get to the casino so often nowadays, but today I was in the mood. Local Grosvenor £3 min table. got there at 5pm only one other player at first.
I'd got £400 in my pocket and had decided that £200 was expendable.
Bought in for £50 in £5s. Started playing £5 a hand. OnceDear <> High Roller !
After very few minutes and a few good doubles and splits, I was at £100, never actually having gone below £40. Too soon to go home. Target set at £150 :o)
So, I started to play silly beggars, doing a 5, 10, 15, 15 progressive. After a total of about 20 mins, I was at £150, so I excused myself while I had a bar snack.
Because I left my chips at the table, and maybe because there were few staff on, they left me 'on the screen' as though I was still playing, this clocking up points. Yayyy.
After my food, I was almost tempted to buy some more chips to ensure that I really was still getting points, but it would have looked a bit odd.
So, back to it: £5, £10, £15, £20, £20 progressive, I ebbed and flowed my way through 3 dealers and still sat at about £160 in chips.
Then a nice newbie dealer came on and I soon found myself with £187.50 in chips. What to do? Should I Marty for the £200?
Nooooo. Been there done that. I wanted a bit of time in play, so no Marty tonight.
I was having fun, so I stuck with a mix of £5, £10 and occasionally £15 bets in no particular pattern.
Could I reach the magical £200? Could I hell! I could not get that extra £12.50 to save my life. But I was ticking over OK.
Then. Another dealer. As it happened, the last one for me tonight.
He was just having golden luck. I just kept getting hands to split and resplit and double and at £10 to £20 a hand, he was slaughtering me with his 21s and Blackjacks.
I stumbled down back to my original £50. Dammit. ( OK. £52.50 if we are going to be pedantic)
Kept playing at £10 a hand.
And there I was. With just £22.50 in chips where once was £187.50 What a darned fool. But I had enjoyed the ebb and flow and had way over two hours of fun behind me.
So I went all in with that last $20 ( held back the £2.50 if you must have all the details :o)
Blackjack. Yayyyy. I had my £50 starting roll back.
In with £25. Win.
Hells teeth, I'd turned that sniveling £22.50 into £102.50 and was 100% up on the session. Shall I go home?
Then, I can only describe the rest of the play as nuts. Fueled by Adrenalin and free caffeine, I was like a man possessed. Even the dealer seemed to be having a sugar rush.
£25 a hand straight betting. This is me in high-roller mode!
Bankroll=£127.50 (that pesky £2.50)
Phone rang. It was the wife wondering where I was. Rejected the call.
Rejected the call again. Not like me :o)
FFS. Surely not.
Went back to £5, £10, £15 progressive.
and there I was. . . £202.50
Handed the £2.50 over as a tip ( Last of the big spenders :o)
Cashed out my £200 for a net profit of £150 on the session. All that on just a single £50 buy-in.
I never expected that. Well, at least not when I was down to that last £22.50.
Dealer errors? Only caught two that affected me, one where he tried to pick up my £20 on a hand that I'd won. And one where the newbie dealer asked me if I wanted to take more cards after splitting aces. She had to confirm with the supervisor when I pointed out that I was not allowed to do that.
Card counting. . . I practiced a bit it was a 6 deck CSM with a discard tray that got emptied at about 75 cards, so not worth the effort. True count never reached 2 in any case, but it was OK to practice.
But tonight was the very essence of what I think it should be like. Playtime was value for money. Food was value for money. Banter with dealers and players was ongoing and friendly. And I came out far enough ahead to afford another session next time the mood takes me.
Oncedear = A lucky Tit once more.