Death of cars and AP

The virus was airborne, all inclusive, and struck indiscriminately all models regardless of nationality.

The first death was recorded on August 29th, 2023.

The symptoms first were a sluggishness of operations of the car. Then, sputtering and coughing, oil spillage and eventually the total and final death of the corroded car parts.

It was an inexplicable car virus that spread throughout the united states. New cars were dead on arrival. By 2025, the entire U.S. was without automobiles.

Bus, trains and planes were immune and so the country resorted to mass transit.

Most business people adjusted. Bus companies created a first class at the front. Other people had to sit in the back (disproportionate amounts of people of color complained the world had stepped backwards while some people claimed America was simply great again).

Car pornography was on the rise. People who fantasized over the sleek curves and sexy colors of unattainable models. Some of the more crass magazines displayed closeups of the exhaust and showed nothing but tail pipe.

The hardest hit were Advantage Players across the west and midwest. These gamblers refused to take buses or trains to their destinations. Effectively, they were put out of business athough many casinos breathed a sigh of relief at the loss of these predators.(the casinos began charging high parking fees for cars which could be stored in the massive parking garages until a hopeful cure might one day be found -- in essence, creating massive multi-storied car mausoleums)

In an interview with car porn magazine "Muffler", AP Axel stated: I was named after a car part, the Axel, so this has been difficult. I used to be all over but since I will never take a train or bus, all I can do is AP those locations I can walk to. I also have a 10-speed bike but if its further than 15 minutes away, I dont bother."

Another AP, Max (real name withheld) was completely shut down. "I used to have a lot of penetration into the casinos but now, I am stranded at my home. I, mean, I know all the paytables. I just cant do anything with that information."

When queried why they dont take the train, both Max and Axel, began looking wistfully into the distance and sighed.

Other AP's from mass transit hubs in the East have seen to take advantage of the sudden power vacuum, people like Darkoz, spreading fear amongst casinos in the west.

Meanwhile, the Wizard of Odds, Mike Shackleford has been working on a combinatorial analysis of how mass transit, combined with bus promos and travel time affects house edge. He is preparing a page of this analysis to come out circa 2026 on his site, WizardofOdds.com

The world of AP was thrown into a tailspin, but due to members like Darkoz, the most feared AP of the entire country now, it is not dead.

Whatever differences people have, I think everyone has to concede, that was funny, well written and creative.

Great story! I've never known an AP to use public transportation of any sort. Recently I took a couple kicking and screaming onto the Monorail, which they had never ridden before, despite living in Vegas for years.

I always enjoy your writing Darkoz, I like the humour.

Quote: darkoz

The virus was airborne, all inclusive, and struck indiscriminately all models regardless of nationality.

The first death was recorded on August 29th, 2023.

The symptoms first were a sluggishness of operations of the car. Then, sputtering and coughing, oil spillage and eventually the total and final death of the corroded car parts.

It was an inexplicable car virus that spread throughout the united states. New cars were dead on arrival. By 2025, the entire U.S. was without automobiles.

Bus, trains and planes were immune and so the country resorted to mass transit.

Most business people adjusted. Bus companies created a first class at the front. Other people had to sit in the back (disproportionate amounts of people of color complained the world had stepped backwards while some people claimed America was simply great again).

Car pornography was on the rise. People who fantasized over the sleek curves and sexy colors of unattainable models. Some of the more crass magazines displayed closeups of the exhaust and showed nothing but tail pipe.

The hardest hit were Advantage Players across the west and midwest. These gamblers refused to take buses or trains to their destinations. Effectively, they were put out of business athough many casinos breathed a sigh of relief at the loss of these predators.(the casinos began charging high parking fees for cars which could be stored in the massive parking garages until a hopeful cure might one day be found -- in essence, creating massive multi-storied car mausoleums)

In an interview with car porn magazine "Muffler", AP Axel stated: I was named after a car part, the Axel, so this has been difficult. I used to be all over but since I will never take a train or bus, all I can do is AP those locations I can walk to. I also have a 10-speed bike but if its further than 15 minutes away, I dont bother."

Another AP, Max (real name withheld) was completely shut down. "I used to have a lot of penetration into the casinos but now, I am stranded at my home. I, mean, I know all the paytables. I just cant do anything with that information."

When queried why they dont take the train, both Max and Axel, began looking wistfully into the distance and sighed.

Other AP's from mass transit hubs in the East have seen to take advantage of the sudden power vacuum, people like Darkoz, spreading fear amongst casinos in the west.

Meanwhile, the Wizard of Odds, Mike Shackleford has been working on a combinatorial analysis of how mass transit, combined with bus promos and travel time affects house edge. He is preparing a page of this analysis to come out circa 2026 on his site, WizardofOdds.com

The world of AP was thrown into a tailspin, but due to members like Darkoz, the most feared AP of the entire country now, it is not dead.

My first advice in writing 101 is, understand
what a paragraph is for and use it correctly.
Here's a hint:

"The unity and coherence of ideas among sentences is what constitutes a paragraph."

One of the hardest things to achieve in
writing is knowing when a new paragraph is
needed. In Hemingway's Green Hills of
Africa there is a paragraph that's 496 words
long. Not only is it a paragraph, it's a single
sentence. This paragraph has been studied
in college writing classes since the 30's as
literary genius.

Quote: Wizard

Great story! I've never known an AP to use public transportation of any sort. Recently I took a couple kicking and screaming onto the Monorail, which they had never ridden before, despite living in Vegas for years.

I have both taken the bus AND ridden my bike to a casino to partake in advantage play. I wouldn't categorize myself as an AP, but I do sometimes do AP. If that makes sense.

I’ve driven both a car and a motorcycle, I’ve walked, bused shuttled and I’ve also taken a tuk tuk. I am the jack of all ways to get to a casino lol.

Edit: of course a taxi too.

Quote: Wizard

Great story! I've never known an AP to use public transportation of any sort. Recently I took a couple kicking and screaming onto the Monorail, which they had never ridden before, despite living in Vegas for years.

I'll take the Deuce in Vegas and took the bus to work here while I waited for a parking lease to open up. But beyond that I just do not do it.

OTOH, when I have a gig in downtown I will park for free at the casino and take the free subway to downtown most times, a case of AP in itself I guess.

Very clever darkoz!

A much needed break, from all that's gone on here the last week or so.

Thanks

BLOCKED!!!!!

Quote: mcallister3200

BLOCKED!!!!!

You need a way bigger font, like 100.
Makes a point..

Quote: darkoz

Bus, trains and planes were immune and so the country resorted to mass transit.

Anyone who has had a successful career up until this point can just buy their own bus and drive it around as their own personal vehicle. Without competition from up-and-comers, who can't get around very easily, they do even better than ever

Quote: TomG

Anyone who has had a successful career up until this point can just buy their own bus and drive it around as their own personal vehicle. Without competition from up-and-comers, who can't get around very easily, they do even better than ever

Oh I forgot

The government prohibited private ownership of buses and planes due to the overload of passengers caused by the outcome of the virus.

Every working bus and plane was necessary for mass transit use

Only APs willing to take the bus survive.

P.S. its my story. I get to decide how it goes thank you very much :)))

Quote: darkoz

The virus was airborne, all inclusive, and struck indiscriminately all models regardless of nationality.

The first death was recorded on August 29th, 2023.

The symptoms first were a sluggishness of operations of the car. Then, sputtering and coughing, oil spillage and eventually the total and final death of the corroded car parts.

It was an inexplicable car virus that spread throughout the united states. New cars were dead on arrival. By 2025, the entire U.S. was without automobiles.

Bus, trains and planes were immune and so the country resorted to mass transit.

Most business people adjusted. Bus companies created a first class at the front. Other people had to sit in the back (disproportionate amounts of people of color complained the world had stepped backwards while some people claimed America was simply great again).

Car pornography was on the rise. People who fantasized over the sleek curves and sexy colors of unattainable models. Some of the more crass magazines displayed closeups of the exhaust and showed nothing but tail pipe.

The hardest hit were Advantage Players across the west and midwest. These gamblers refused to take buses or trains to their destinations. Effectively, they were put out of business athough many casinos breathed a sigh of relief at the loss of these predators.(the casinos began charging high parking fees for cars which could be stored in the massive parking garages until a hopeful cure might one day be found -- in essence, creating massive multi-storied car mausoleums)

In an interview with car porn magazine "Muffler", AP Axel stated: I was named after a car part, the Axel, so this has been difficult. I used to be all over but since I will never take a train or bus, all I can do is AP those locations I can walk to. I also have a 10-speed bike but if its further than 15 minutes away, I dont bother."

Another AP, Max (real name withheld) was completely shut down. "I used to have a lot of penetration into the casinos but now, I am stranded at my home. I, mean, I know all the paytables. I just cant do anything with that information."

When queried why they dont take the train, both Max and Axel, began looking wistfully into the distance and sighed.

Other AP's from mass transit hubs in the East have seen to take advantage of the sudden power vacuum, people like Darkoz, spreading fear amongst casinos in the west.

Meanwhile, the Wizard of Odds, Mike Shackleford has been working on a combinatorial analysis of how mass transit, combined with bus promos and travel time affects house edge. He is preparing a page of this analysis to come out circa 2026 on his site, WizardofOdds.com

The world of AP was thrown into a tailspin, but due to members like Darkoz, the most feared AP of the entire country now, it is not dead.

Someone told me I should come read this story. It's pretty much what I expected. A bus bench induced fantasy. You really have to watch out for those exhaust fumes. Not very cohesively structured I might add. Personally, I just plan on buying and learning to fly a helicopter, if that happens, as they don't seem to be affected by the virus according to the story.
Also, I'm aware enough to ensure that I am surrounded by enough casinos within walking distance to survive many lifetimes.
I find it ironic that it's not acceptable to discuss religion but science fiction is perfectly acceptable.

Edit: also Axle is not Axel. Little details like that can help one understand a potato chip contest.

I spent 5 minutes writing the OP amd already I am being compared to Hemingway

Dont know much about Hemingway but Tolkien took 40 years to write the LOTR

For the Wizard and the rest of you who enjoyed this story which literally came to me 10 minutes before posting it,

I thank you and you are welcome for the appreciation

I actually had a dream. I think it was inspired by <one politician saying stuff about potus>. We were all there, it was a marathon or some sort of a running thing. Darkoz had all the top notch marathon running person equipment and clothing on. For some reason MaxPen was dressed to the nines wearing a super nice suit. DRitch was there wearing a hospital gown (fresh out of surgery), we were like dude you shouldn’t be running and he was like “f*** them doctors, I’m gonna die eventually right?” Then he lit up a cigarette and kept on running.

Quote: darkoz

Dont know much about Hemingway but Tolkien took 40 years to write the LOTR

Yeah, not even close.

Tolkien began working on the story in late 1937. He completed a semi-final draft of the main narrative in 1948 but by 1950 J.R.R. Tolkien had begun working on the Appendices. He paused his work to make changes to the background material that would be compatible with the published 2nd edition of The Hobbit. When The Lord of the Rings was finally accepted for publication Tolkien made numerous changes on the galley proofs, even rewriting many paragraphs. The final galley proofs were sent to the publisher in 1954 or 1955. It would thus be more accurate to suggest that it took about 17 years; (allowing for some breaks) from start to finish for J.R.R. Tolkien to write The Lord of the Rings.

Took 17 years to complete it, but 11
years to actually write it. Where you
pulled 40 from is a mystery.

Fortunately for me - I live in one of the hick middle states smack dab in the middle of flyover country so I'd travel to casinos the same way I do now - on my faithful steed Nappy (short for Napoleon Complex because - bless his heart - he has delusions of being the most feared stallion west of the Mississippi.)

After a hard day of casino hopping, he is shown here being consoled in soothing hushed tones by my best friend Billy Bob Chuck Fred after a drunk casino patron yelled that Nappy's growth had been retarded by policies of Donald Trump and that Nappy would best serve humanity by being sent off to a meat packing plant in Belgium.

Quote: Puckerbutt

Fortunately for me - I live in one of the hick middle states smack dab in the middle of flyover country so I'd travel to casinos the same way I do now - on my faithful steed Nappy (short for Napoleon Complex because - bless his heart - he has delusions of being the most feared stallion west of the Mississippi.)

After a hard day of casino hopping, he is shown here being consoled in soothing hushed tones by my best friend Billy Bob Chuck Fred after a drunk casino patron yelled that Nappy's growth had been retarded by policies of Donald Trump and that Nappy would best serve humanity by being sent off to a meat packing plant in Belgium.

The image of Nappy does not show up for me. But i copied and pasted the url into my browser and it came up clear as a bell. Nappy is BEAUTIFUL.

Quote: Puckerbutt

Fortunately for me - I live in one of the hick middle states smack dab in the middle of flyover country so I'd travel to casinos the same way I do now - on my faithful steed Nappy (short for Napoleon Complex because - bless his heart - he has delusions of being the most feared stallion west of the Mississippi.)

After a hard day of casino hopping, he is shown here being consoled in soothing hushed tones by my best friend Billy Bob Chuck Fred after a drunk casino patron yelled that Nappy's growth had been retarded by policies of Donald Trump and that Nappy would best serve humanity by being sent off to a meat packing plant in Belgium.

Nappy is gorgeous. I know people who would be absolutely gaga over him as a mini horse, just as he stands.

Quote: EvenBob

Yeah, not even close.

Tolkien began working on the story in late 1937. He completed a semi-final draft of the main narrative in 1948 but by 1950 J.R.R. Tolkien had begun working on the Appendices. He paused his work to make changes to the background material that would be compatible with the published 2nd edition of The Hobbit. When The Lord of the Rings was finally accepted for publication Tolkien made numerous changes on the galley proofs, even rewriting many paragraphs. The final galley proofs were sent to the publisher in 1954 or 1955. It would thus be more accurate to suggest that it took about 17 years; (allowing for some breaks) from start to finish for J.R.R. Tolkien to write The Lord of the Rings.

Took 17 years to complete it, but 11
years to actually write it. Where you
pulled 40 from is a mystery.

Tolkien began writing his stories of middle earth as early as 1917. Many early drafts have been published by his son Christopher. These early versions would morph in many ways but Tolkien was writing the histories of middle Earth for nearly 20 years by 1937.

Thats why when Bilbo finds the ring in The Hobbit there is so much backstory about the ring even then.

So 1917 to the 1950's approximately 40 years give or take a few.

I suppose if you want to discount notes and the creation of the Elvin linguistics and the lays and songs and other background material in LOTR and just start the clock from the most polished draft as published then its 17 years.

Quote: darkoz

Tolkien began writing his stories of middle earth as early as 1917.

So what. That's like saying Hemingway
took 30 years to write Old Man and
the Sea because he wrote a bunch of
fishing stories in the early 20's (he did)
and finished with OMATS in 1952. Sorry,
it doesn't work that way.

You could say it took Tolkein 40 years
to create LOTR, like Hemingway had
the idea for his book 25 years earlier.
But it actually took Tolkein 11 years
to write it, not 40.

Quote: EvenBob

So what. That's like saying Hemingway
took 30 years to write Old Man and
the Sea because he wrote a bunch of
fishing stories in the early 20's (he did)
and finished with OMATS in 1952. Sorry,
it doesn't work that way.

You could say it took Tolkein 40 years
to create LOTR, like Hemingway had
the idea for his book 25 years earlier.
But it actually took Tolkein 11 years
to write it, not 40.

Meh, 11 years, 17 years, 40 years.

Still not a 5 minute forum post.

Not sure why you like comparing me to Hemingway and Tolkien but I will take the compliment

Even saying I am NOT in their league is a compliment that you would even make the comparison.

I have no clue how many minutes it took you to write that, but whatever it was you spent way too much time on it. And now I have how's the well. Whatever it was, I'm sure it was just fine, I wouldn't know because I stopped reading after the first few sentences.

Quote: AxelWolf

I have no clue how many minutes it took you to write that, but whatever it was you spent way too much time on it. And now I have how's the well. Whatever it was, I'm sure it was just fine, I wouldn't know because I stopped reading after the first few sentences.

Is it me or was that post incoherent?

"And now I have how's the well."

What?

Quote: darkoz

What?

Must be auto-correct or something. I think the intent was "And now I have as well." Anyway, as for his final sentence, it is his loss.

Quote: darkoz

Not sure why you like comparing me to Hemingway and Tolkien

If you'd ever read Hemingway or Tolkein
you'd realize how hilarious your sentence
is.

Quote: EvenBob

If you'd ever read Hemingway or Tolkein
you'd realize how hilarious your sentence
is.

Well once again thanks for the comparison

Im glad you recognize how good my writing is

Quote: darkoz

Well once again thanks for the comparison

To repeat: If you'd ever read Hemingway or Tolkein
you'd realize how hilarious your sentence
is. A real belly laugh.

buses, trains, cars, planes...........meh..............................


this is what I'm going to buy - personal flying machine - rocks big time - as the kids say or maybe used to say - awesomely radical




https://www.rt.com/viral/361663-jetpack-test-flight-monaco/

Quote: Wizard

Great story! I've never known an AP to use public transportation of any sort.

Ahem.

Quote: EvenBob

To repeat: If you'd ever read Hemingway or Tolkein
you'd realize how hilarious your sentence
is. A real belly laugh.

You continue to compare me to Hemingway and Tolkien

I am genuinely complimented.

Thank you so much for the vote of confidence

Even though I don't feel in their league its very reassuring to see you make the comparison

Only by such great writing skills can one expect such comparisons

Again EB, thanks for your support.

Quote: lilredrooster

buses, trains, cars, planes...........meh..............................


this is what I'm going to buy - personal flying machine - rocks big time - as the kids say or maybe used to say - awesomely radical




https://www.rt.com/viral/361663-jetpack-test-flight-monaco/

Now this guy definitely looks like he could be the most feared AP, at least in Western Europe!

PS, I'm not ashamed to say I took a city bus to a casino once. Not to mention various shuttle buses.

Until the last couple of years, I have generally not rented a car in Vegas, so I can say I've used the monorail many times, the Deuce, and shuttle buses more than once. I'm also quite fond of the AC jitney when I'm up there.

Quote: Wizard

Great story! I've never known an AP to use public transportation of any sort.

It's all the new rage, along with being a once homeless AP. It started off with Mickey going from ridding the rails to an turning his life around to now a sober AP. He had to be one up'ed by a once homeless subway living bus ridding AP.

The next big thing will be a homeless heroin addict that rose from the ashes of a burnt down crack house who walks to all his AP plays.

Oh, nvm ,that's half the downtown machine vultures.

Quote: AxelWolf

It's all the new rage, along with being a once homeless AP. It started off with Mickey going from ridding the rails to an turning his life around to now a sober AP. He had to be one up'ed by a once homeless subway living bus ridding AP.

The next big thing will be a homeless heroin addict that rose from the ashes of a burnt down crack house who walks to all his AP plays.

Oh, nvm ,that's half the downtown machine vultures.

We have a caste system here in America?

It feels like you respect people who worked their way up from the bottom less

Quote: darkoz

P.S. its my story. I get to decide how it goes thank you very much :)))

Oh, now I get it. This is fiction!
Well, slip Fleastiff a handful of red chips and he will be happy to compare you to both Ernest Hemmingway and also his arch rival, Mickey Spillane.

But please...
(sudden urge for a new paragraph)
do tell us if the virus compelled the APs to take down their Place Bets in a whimsical pattern.

(Forgive me folks, but I just completed one mile on my Mini Exercise Bike and it seems to have drained what ever is left (or right) of my brain cells).

Quote: darkoz

We have a caste system here in America?

It feels like you respect people who worked their way up from the bottom less

Just like a drug addict, it takes a certain mentality to wind up homeless in the first place. Especially for an extended period of time. No, the victim of circumstance BS doesn't fly 99.97% of the time and no amount of some joker's fantasy changes that.

Quote: MaxPen

Just like a drug addict, it takes a certain mentality to wind up homeless in the first place. Especially for an extended period of time. No, the victim of circumstance BS doesn't fly 99.97% of the time and no amount of some joker's fantasy changes that.

Which makes me the .03% thanks I appreciate the compliment

Quote: darkoz

Which makes me the .03% thanks I appreciate the compliment

Delusional disorders are abundant in the homeless community.

Quote: MaxPen

Delusional disorders are abundant in the homeless community.

I agree.

Gamblers too

Welcome to the club Max

Quote: beachbumbabs

Until the last couple of years, I have generally not rented a car in Vegas, so I can say I've used the monorail many times, the Deuce, and shuttle buses more than once. I'm also quite fond of the AC jitney when I'm up there.

Not having the monorail go to McCarran is the dumbest infrastructure decision. Instead of making the city easier and cheaper for everyone, lets just maker sure all our visitors dump more money than they need to into Uber and Lyft.

Quote: Puckerbutt

After a hard day of casino hopping, he is shown here being consoled in soothing hushed tones by my best friend Billy Bob Chuck Fred after a drunk casino patron yelled that Nappy's growth had been retarded by policies of Donald Trump and that Nappy would best serve humanity by being sent off to a meat packing plant in Belgium.

That person may not be aware of new rules,
but I take this as a direct personal attack AND an unwarranted attack on my country.

On QWERTY keyboards, is S so close to P?

Quote: darkoz

We have a caste system here in America?

It feels like you respect people who worked their way up from the bottom less

That's absolutely not true, I came to Vegas at 18 years old on one of your beloved Greyhound buses. I had a suspended driver's license, I owed a bunch of money in fines to get it back.Talk about bad luck, within hours after getting to vegas I got a ticket for driving a motor cycle around the block.

I had very little money and very little education, however, I was always able to get and maintain a job and shelter. The first job I got after I arrived to Vegas was due to my persistence, I kept going back to the same restaurant that was in walking distance almost daily and kept asking the owners to give me a job or hinting at it, and he finally did. He told me later when he gave me a "promotion" it was only due to my persistence that I got the job in the first place.

I finally bough a Honda Elite scooter and within 3 weeks I was pulled over hand cuffed and almost arrested, it turns out it had been stolen. I watched as they towed it off. Compared to all the bad s*** that happened to me since at various times throughout the years that was happy times. I don't feel the need to bring it all up on a public forum.

When I barely first got into Advantage play, at one point I had three different jobs and one was full-time,yet, I still never had any money or a car, it all went to bills, paying off fines, trying to have fun and just living. I was always looking for a better job or something different that improve my situation. I Always trying to figure out who were idiots VS the smart and wise, and then try to learn something from people who knew what they were talking about and perhaps even improve on that.

Quote: AxelWolf

That's absolutely not true, I came to Vegas at 18 years old

When was that, 2014 or so? Or
was it later.

Quote: EvenBob

When was that, 2014 or so? Or
was it later.

I really wish I were that young Bob.

Quote: kubikulann

That person may not be aware of new rules,

I'm aware of the new rule and was aware at the time of my posting.

I got a nice laugh out of it. Sorry you are having to deal with a large amount of criticism over it, darkoz.

Quote: EvenBob

So what. That's like saying Hemingway
took 30 years to write Old Man and
the Sea because he wrote a bunch of
fishing stories in the early 20's (he did)
and finished with OMATS in 1952. Sorry,
it doesn't work that way.

You could say it took Tolkein 40 years
to create LOTR, like Hemingway had
the idea for his book 25 years earlier.
But it actually took Tolkein 11 years
to write it, not 40.

I don’t want to derail this thread but as a Tolkien fan, I just have to jump in.

Tolkien began the stories that would eventually be published as the Silmarillion in 1914. The stories form the underlying mythology of the Lord of the Rings. They are more then just casually related, or “other stuff” that Tolkien wrote in a similar vein. Galadriel is a character in the story. Elrond is a character in the story. Elrond’s brother Elros is an ancestor of Aragon, which is why Aragorn is actually the “hidden king” of Gondor. Sauron is the main antagonist from the second age on. Gandalf, Saruman, Celeborn and too many others to mention play minor roles.

The whole arc of the first half of the book is the story of the Elven exile to Middle-Earth by the Valar and eventual redemption and invitation to return by ship to the Undying Lands. That’s why the last chapter of the LOTR has so much underlying emotional weight.

Not to mention all the histories, languages, place names, etc. etc.

So while I understand your interpretation that it took Tolkien 11 years to actually write the book, the idea that it took him 40 years is not a new or ridiculous idea.

The Lord of the Rings was his life’s work. Every Tolkien fan I’ve ever spoken with knows that. That’s precisely what we love about it... that’s what we marvel at.

Sorry if I got a bit carried away... but there’s my 2c.
DJ