The Greatest Machine Pro Of Allltime
He was known as the Fremont Street Commando in his bygone days. But now he is pushing 62 years old and lives in Montana. He doesn't give a rats ass about how old he is or where he lives. He simply maintains his position, and he calls out all others, about who is the real sharp machine pro on the plant earth.
Mickey Crimm, the Fremont Street Commando, will tell the whole world that he is the best machine pro of all time.
Quote: mickeycrimmThe greatest machine pro of all time lives in Great Falls, Montana. What he knows about the gambling world is the inside looking out. No one in the gambling world has the power to touch him. He knows he holds it over all of them. He knows that there is not another machine pro on the planet who can claim that their only income comes from the machines. He knows that he has no problem whacking machines for $100,000 a year. And if he worked harder he could push it to $150,000 a year.
He was known as the Fremont Street Commando in his bygone days. But now he is pushing 62 years old and lives in Montana. He doesn't give a rats ass about how old he is or where he lives. He simply maintains his position, and he calls out all others, about who is the real sharp machine pro on the plant earth.
Mickey Crimm, the Fremont Street Commando, will tell the whole world that he is the best machine pro of all time.
Reminds me of Tommy Carmichael and Dennis Nikrasch.
Quote: mickeycrimmThe greatest machine pro of all time lives in Great Falls, Montana. What he knows about the gambling world is the inside looking out. No one in the gambling world has the power to touch him. He knows he holds it over all of them. He knows that there is not another machine pro on the planet who can claim that their only income comes from the machines. He knows that he has no problem whacking machines for $100,000 a year. And if he worked harder he could push it to $150,000 a year.
He was known as the Fremont Street Commando in his bygone days. But now he is pushing 62 years old and lives in Montana. He doesn't give a rats ass about how old he is or where he lives. He simply maintains his position, and he calls out all others, about who is the real sharp machine pro on the plant earth.
Mickey Crimm, the Fremont Street Commando, will tell the whole world that he is the best machine pro of all time.
I get a big ego when I'm drinking.
Quote: mickeycrimmI get a big ego when I'm drinking.
We hadn't noticed Mickey. Lol
Hey Mickey, how about tonight when you get good and cocked give us a little rant on your pal R S.Quote: mickeycrimmI get a big ego when I'm drinking.
The position of screw you
Quote: mickeycrimmHe knows that he has no problem whacking machines for $100,000 a year. And if he worked harder he could push it to $150,000 a year.
The problem is this is not that much money compared to jobs in the real world :)
Quote: MoscaIs this where you're at? I envy you. (Video linked instead of embedded due to language. NSFW, nor the kids.)
The position of screw you
Thanks for giving me a goal to shoot for. I needed that.
Quote: FroggerThe problem is this is not that much money compared to jobs in the real world :)
100k a year is far above the average individual salary in America (I think its above the average household income).
So if he makes that much just working a few hours a week (not mention probably has a lot more fun than somebody in a office grind type job). Plus, no doubt, all of the awesome comps from being a heavy slot player.
Quote: mickeycrimmThe greatest machine pro of all time lives in Great Falls, Montana. What he knows about the gambling world is the inside looking out. No one in the gambling world has the power to touch him. He knows he holds it over all of them. He knows that there is not another machine pro on the planet who can claim that their only income comes from the machines. He knows that he has no problem whacking machines for $100,000 a year. And if he worked harder he could push it to $150,000 a year.
He was known as the Fremont Street Commando in his bygone days. But now he is pushing 62 years old and lives in Montana. He doesn't give a rats ass about how old he is or where he lives. He simply maintains his position, and he calls out all others, about who is the real sharp machine pro on the plant earth.
Mickey Crimm, the Fremont Street Commando, will tell the whole world that he is the best machine pro of all time.
A rare photo of Crimm in his youth...
Quote: MoscaIs this where you're at? I envy you. (Video linked instead of embedded due to language. NSFW, nor the kids.)
The position of screw you
Goodman sounds like me when I'm at the bar.
Quote: FroggerThe problem is this is not that much money compared to jobs in the real world :)
Machine pros are the low men/women on the gambling world totum pole. Poker players, sports bettors, blackjack players have gotten filthy rich. There have been times where machine pros made 7 figure scores but it is extremely rare. When I'm not drunk I consider the late Tuna Lund to be the best machine pro of all time. He probably made more money than anyone ever has.
There is a machine pro out there, Mike S., who related the story to us of him and Tuna making 8 million dollars in four years on an 8-spot progressive keno play in Florida. They wound up partners on the play so they wouldn't be butting heads. They were paying people $30 an hour to play the game. They got ripped off for 2 jackpots when the people wouldn't turn over the money. This was the late nineties/early 2000's and Tuna had disappeared out of the poker world. Everyone was wondering where he was. It was his sister that told me where Tuna was and what he was doing. He was also raising two kids and sending the baby mother through rehab.
I think I'm a pretty rare breed. I don't there are that many non team machine pros that can do $100,000 a year. You can probably count them on one hand.
Quote: mickeycrimmMachine pros are the low men/women on the gambling world totum pole. Poker players, sports bettors, blackjack players have gotten filthy rich. There have been times where machine pros made 7 figure scores but it is extremely rare. When I'm not drunk I consider the late Tuna Lund to be the best machine pro of all time. He probably made more money than anyone ever has.
There is a machine pro out there, Mike S., who related the story to us of him and Tuna making 8 million dollars in four years on an 8-spot progressive keno play in Florida. They wound up partners on the play so they wouldn't be butting heads. They were paying people $30 an hour to play the game. They got ripped off for 2 jackpots when the people wouldn't turn over the money. This was the late nineties/early 2000's and Tuna had disappeared out of the poker world. Everyone was wondering where he was. It was his sister that told me where Tuna was and what he was doing. He was also raising two kids and sending the baby mother through rehab.
I think I'm a pretty rare breed. I don't there are that many non team machine pros that can do $100,000 a year. You can probably count them on one hand.
There was also the Chicagoland boats from 2000 to 2004 where a few machine pros made 7 figures. And, of course, no one told me about it until it was over with.
Quote: FroggerThe problem is this is not that much money compared to jobs in the real world :)
The problem for me with jobs in the real world is I'm unemployable. I'm just gonna get drunk and screw it up. I'm happy with what I make and I don't answer to anyone. Employee's answer to employers. Employers answer to the public. I don't answer to anyone.
Quote: sodawaterWe haven't heard of the best machine pro of all time because he has enough sense not to brag about it.
And he also has no soul if he is willing to take his secrets to the grave and not let future generations know his secrets and techniques. When a person masters something and doesn't pass it on to future generations then in my opinion this type of person is a thoroughly miserable bastard.
Quote: MoscaIs this where you're at? I envy you. (Video linked instead of embedded due to language. NSFW, nor the kids.)
The position of screw you
John Goodman pretty much echoed my sentiments. Bob Dancer practically begged me to let him get my life story published. I think he intended to do it through Huntington Press. F--- You, blow me. There is no way in hell I would become beholden to Bob Dancer. Henry Tamburin asked me to write for his newsletter. F--- You blow me. Do you think I'm gonna punch your time clock? Blow me. For 8 years I have been pushed by the public, those who know me over the internet. I will never make such a statement to them. I have it in the works where I have full control. Because publishers can all blow me too. I maintain full control or nobody gets nothing. Yes' I'm just like John Goodman. The world can f---off and blow me.
Quote: mickeycrimm
I think I'm a pretty rare breed. I don't there are that many non team machine pros that can do $100,000 a year. You can probably count them on one hand.
I know 6 :)
Quote: FroggerI know 6 :)
I'm number 7. I think we are going to two hand now.
No, I don't think so.Quote: mcallister3200Best machine pro: kerkebet or whatever his name is, hands downNo,;)
Quote: mcallister3200Best machine pro: kerkebet or whatever his name is, hands down;)
Nope it's Rob Singer.
I would like to nominate someone I care about very much as the worst part time machine pro of all time. The other day, she couldnt stop playing wild cherry pies and diamond mine regardless of how full they were. She also likes 65 super aces and now believes in dice influencing.
Quote: RogerKintNope it's Rob Singer.
I would like to nominate someone I care about very much as the worst part time machine pro of all time. The other day, she couldnt stop playing wild cherry pies and diamond mine regardless of how full they were. She also likes 65 super aces and now believes in dice influencing.
This is a hilarious post. Thanks for making me laugh.
You will have to elaborate on that.Quote: RogerKintNope it's Rob Singer.
I would like to nominate someone I care about very much as the worst part time machine pro of all time. The other day, she couldnt stop playing wild cherry pies and diamond mine regardless of how full they were. She also likes 65 super aces and now believes in dice influencing.
It might be intervention time.
Quote: AxelWolfYou will have to elaborate on that.
It might be intervention time.
Well, when she finds multi-strike she exclaims "I love this game!" and puts in a couple bills. I say "dont you want to at least check the pay table before you start playing?" Her response is "Nerd alert!!!." It's a good thing Vegas is so far away.
Quote: RogerKintWell, when she finds multi-strike she exclaims "I love this game!" and puts in a couple bills. I say "dont you want to at least check the pay table before you start playing?" Her response is "Nerd alert!!!." It's a good thing Vegas is so far away.
Thanks for still making me laugh. You know the old saying. Roger, you can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink.
LOL!! good one.Quote: RogerKint" Her response is "Nerd alert!!!." .
Quote: mickeycrimmRoger, the most hilarious situation in gambling is the stone cold pro who has a compulsive gambling girlfriend. The dumb ass bitch has only one thing working for. She makes him hornier than hell and makes him start thinking with his penis. She squanders his money, which is totally foreign to his nature, but he can't stop thinking with his penis. I've been there.
U make me feel better that I am not alone. I can't seem to convince these girls not to gamble negative ev and I can't tell them what I do until I totally trust them. I never win in this situation.
Just out of curiosity who got her into gambling in to "AP" in the first place.Quote: RogerKintWell, when she finds multi-strike she exclaims "I love this game!" and puts in a couple bills. I say "dont you want to at least check the pay table before you start playing?" Her response is "Nerd alert!!!." It's a good thing Vegas is so far away.
Thank god no girl I ever dated was a gambler or money hungry. You can usually tell what type of girl they are in just a few minutes, if not your FKed. If shes into Money or gambling plan upfront to hit it, quit it and forget it. Girls like that might be fun for a few weeks, but then not so much, they are usually the pernicious type anyways, you'll just drive yourself crazy in the end.Quote: mickeycrimmRoger, the most hilarious situation in gambling is the stone cold pro who has a compulsive gambling girlfriend. The dumb ass bitch has only one thing working for. She makes him hornier than hell and makes him start thinking with his penis. She squanders his money, which is totally foreign to his nature, but he can't stop thinking with his penis. I've been there.
My GF is very risk adverse she will help on good plays, but she doesn't care if she plays or not. Most of the time if given a choice, she's not interested. I usually have to force her to put in a $20 instead of a $10 to get a comped drink. She will play 5 hands and cash out like its her last 20.
Mostly she just wants me to take her out once a week for free dinner or something comped. No buying of gifts that cost more than $100 (I have to lie about the price and claim it was on sale).
She doesn't car about expensive things and actually objects to them. She is a coupon cutter /price matcher/99 cents store. She refuses to buy name brand stuff. Sometimes I like name brand food or something more expensive. She says, "if I want that stuff, go yourself get it all you want, but I'm not going to be an enabler." If I demand it, she will begrudgingly get it knowing Ill just buy more expensive stuff.
I'm a more compulsive buyer than she is. She claims I wast money.
Quote: AxelWolfThank god no girl I ever dated was a gambler or money hungry. You can usually tell what type of girl they are in just a few minutes, if not your FKed. If shes into Money or gambling plan upfront to hit it, quit it and forget it. Girls like that might be fun for a few weeks, but then not so much, they are usually the pernicious type anyways, you'll just drive yourself crazy in the end.
My GF is very risk adverse she will help on good plays, but she doesn't care if she plays or not. Most of the time if given a choice, she's not interested. I usually have to force her to put in a $20 instead of a $10 to get a comped drink. She will play 5 hands and cash out like its her last 20.
Mostly she just wants me to take her out once a week for free dinner or something comped. No buying of gifts that cost more than $100 (I have to lie about the price and claim it was on sale).
She doesn't car about expensive things and actually objects to them. She is a coupon cutter /price matcher/99 cents store. She refuses to buy name brand stuff. Sometimes I like name brand food or something more expensive. She says, "if I want that stuff, go yourself get it all you want, but I'm not going to be an enabler." If I demand it, she will begrudgingly get it knowing Ill just buy more expensive stuff.
I'm a more compulsive buyer than she is. She claims I wast money.
I've always had a taste for wild women. The kind that can't be broke. That's my own fault. I don't blame them.
3 kids with 2 ex husbands, no panties, "oh thats just a cold sore" "Can you buy me a drink and cigarettes?" chippies, But anything goes.Quote: mickeycrimmI've always had a taste for wild women. The kind that can't be broke. That's my own fault. I don't blame them.
Quote: ontariodealer"oh thats just a cold sore" lol
Why is that funny?
Quote: RogerKintI say "dont you want to at least check the pay table before you start playing?" Her response is "Nerd alert!!!."
Please quit dating my wife.
The few times I have went to a WOV gathering my wife calls it a meeting of the Math Nerds.
Quote: DRichThe few times I have went to a WOV gathering my wife calls it a meeting of the Math Nerds.
You should have brought your wives along last month. They could have seen that no matter how nerdy we may appear, math may not really be a very strong suit. Why, we were tremendously thankful for a generous member who covered our entire bill, because without that we probably couldn't have calculated how to split it!
Quote: DocYou should have brought your wives along last month. They could have seen that no matter how nerdy we may appear, math may not really be a very strong suit. Why, we were tremendously thankful for a generous member who covered our entire bill, because without that we probably couldn't have calculated how to split it!
I was, in fact, going around the table with the bill and asking for payment from each person individually when I was told someone had stepped up (very early in the process, thank goodness). I can't thank that person enough. But I was prepared to dun everyone and check off the items after the waitress informed me she would not be able to split out the bill and asked if I would take care of it. All FWIW.
Quote: mickeycrimmQuote: MoscaIs this where you're at? I envy you. (Video linked instead of embedded due to language. NSFW, nor the kids.)
The position of screw you
John Goodman pretty much echoed my sentiments. Bob Dancer practically begged me to let him get my life story published. I think he intended to do it through Huntington Press. F--- You, blow me. There is no way in hell I would become beholden to Bob Dancer. Henry Tamburin asked me to write for his newsletter. F--- You blow me. Do you think I'm gonna punch your time clock? Blow me. For 8 years I have been pushed by the public, those who know me over the internet. I will never make such a statement to them. I have it in the works where I have full control. Because publishers can all blow me too. I maintain full control or nobody gets nothing. Yes' I'm just like John Goodman. The world can f---off and blow me.
Awesome, I salute you.
You know what, though, your system would be wasted on me, if you told me. That life doesn't work for me. I often try to tell people: understand DIFFERENCES. What works for me doesn't work for you, what works for you doesn't work for me... except, when we meet we can raise a glass together.
We all SAY we want that, but when we are offered the choice to do it, for one reason or another we decline. From one point of view, it can be called cowardice. From another point of view it can be called courage. But what it really is: people being who they are wired to be.
Quote: mickeycrimm
I've always had a taste for wild women. The kind that can't be broke. That's my own fault. I don't blame them.
Quote: AxelWolf3 kids with 2 ex husbands, no panties, "oh thats just a cold sore" "Can you buy me a drink and cigarettes?" chippies, But anything goes.
Hysterical, both of you. Me 40 years ago (without the kids, ex's, or cold sores; teen rebellion at its finest). But I woke up after a couple of years. Although, for mickeycrimm, I suspect I could resurrect a bit of it. hahaha
Quote: beachbumbabsI was, in fact, going around the table with the bill and asking for payment from each person individually when I was told someone had stepped up (very early in the process, thank goodness). I can't thank that person enough. But I was prepared to dun everyone and check off the items after the waitress informed me she would not be able to split out the bill and asked if I would take care of it. All FWIW.
OK. Now we know the identity of the designated math nerd. ;-)
Quote: DocYou should have brought your wives along last month. They could have seen that no matter how nerdy we may appear, math may not really be a very strong suit. Why, we were tremendously thankful for a generous member who covered our entire bill, because without that we probably couldn't have calculated how to split it!
Point well taken. To be fair, the only one of this group she has met is Michael and that was years ago when she worked at Huntington Press and he was publishing his book.
Quote: DRichPoint well taken. To be fair, the only one of this group she has met is Michael and that was years ago when she worked at Huntington Press and he was publishing his book.
For those not aware, my use of the plural "wives" is a reference to the tee shirt DRich wore to the 2015 Winter Event.
I am the King. You can be 2nd best MC.
ZCore13
zcore, don't even think about going to Montana without Mickey's permission, or he will stick his boot up your ass, or knock your balls clean upiinto your chin, or something like that.Quote: Zcore13I believe I am the greatest machine pro in the Country. I actually just nailed a quick hits for a jackpot in my first 5 spins last weekend.
I am the King. You can be 2nd best MC.
ZCore13
Quote: mcallister3200zcore, don't even think about going to Montana without Mickey's permission, or he will stick his boot up your ass, or knock your balls clean upiinto your chin, or something like that.
A few months ago, I was invited to meet Mickey if I was even in Montana. I don't meet many folks from the sites, but I would actually love to meet Mickey. I find him very entertaining and interesting and am sure I could learn many things from him. (whether or not he would be willing to teach me anything is an entirely different matter...lol). But my problem is that I don't like to travel outside the US, and Montana qualifies as outside the US to me (a foreign and STRANGE land). Lol.
Quote: mcallister3200zcore, don't even think about going to Montana without Mickey's permission, or he will stick his boot up your ass, or knock your balls clean upiinto your chin, or something like that.
In my younger days and with the right woman, both of those would have seemed like a great night out.
I know better than to go into Montana and play slots or go to a bar without Mickey's permission and protection. There's been a lot of stories of athlete's and business owners working their way out of the slums and tough life that Montana brings you. Watts, Detroit and Brownsville have nothing on the streets of Montana!
ZCore13
Quote: Zcore13In my younger days and with the right woman, both of those would have seemed like a great night out.
I know better than to go into Montana and play slots or go to a bar without Mickey's permission and protection. There's been a lot of stories of athlete's and business owners working their way out of the slums and tough life that Montana brings you. Watts, Detroit and Brownsville have nothing on the streets of Montana!
ZCore13
Montanans have excepted me but they tell me to tell everyone else to stay where they are at. They don't like the big city folk bringing their big city problems to Montana. Except during tourist season. But once you've seen it go home. That's their attitude.
We mostly get the white racist whack jobs moving here. They have dreams of breaking off the northwest from the rest of the country. The Montana Minutemen come to mind. They were one of the first paramilitary organizations in the country. They are still moving into the state mostly settling up on the Flathead. I would suggest to any of the bad guys of Watts or Detroit that if they want to go up there messing with those racist thugs they better come in formidable numbers and be armed to the teeth.
Then there are the Montana Freemen out of Jordan who don't mind getting into an occasional armed standoff with the FBI. BTW, Benny Binion's cattle ranch was at Jordan. Benny spent a lot of summers at Jordan. I imagine he got along fine with the Freemen because he had no problem shooting black people that tried to move in on his Policy operations in Dallas.
Then we get the occasional dude that likes to blow people up, like Ten Kaczynski, the Unabomber. I stop in to Lincoln here and there. The first time there I was on a play in the Watering Hole Bar and, just to get a conversation going with the locals, I asked them if the Unabomer drank at that bar. That got a big laugh out of everybody. I got told that the dude was a teetotaler. He only came into town to check his mail and buy provisions. I suspect the dude was probably drawing food stamps.
So, in closing, we have enough whack jobs here already. Don't send any more up. BTW, did you know the Unabomber has a PHD in mathematics?
