Star Trek The Experience

Does anyone know anything about the future of this attraction?

I'm a rehabilitated trekkie (don't ask), but I enjoyed it a lot in 08 (just in time, too) back at the Hilton. Last I heard it was being moved downtown to Neonopolis. During my last visit, May 09, it wasn't there yet (not open at any rate).

Last I heard the reopening in Neonopolis was pushed back until 2010.

Thanks! I don't suppose you know when on 2010? I usually travel to Vegas in may, but I'd like to try March next year (it's bound to be cooler on March).

Don't believe everything you read on the internet.

You can still, easily, pull up press releases that state that it will open on 5/8/9 in Neonopolis. The opening would coincide with the opening of the movie.

FYI: Neonopolis is a retail mall, with 11 movie theaters, adjacent to Freemont.

Instead, the Experience never opened, and, ironically, the theater closed on 5/8/9. Some of the stores are still open.



Now you can find plenty of press releases stating that it will open in Neonopolis 'sometime' in 2010.

I wouldn't hold my breath waiting...





Interestingly, the Experience advertising wall on the exterior of the Hilton is still there (At least it was when I was there 2 months ago). You can see this plain as day from the monorail. I don't know if you can see it from the street.

Quote: DJTeddyBear

Don't believe everything you read on the internet.

You can still, easily, pull up press releases that state that it will open on 5/8/9 in Neonopolis. The opening would coincide with the opening of the movie.

FYI: Neonopolis is a retail mall, with 11 movie theaters, adjacent to Freemont.

Instead, the Experience never opened, and, ironically, the theater closed on 5/8/9. Some of the stores are still open.



Now you can find plenty of press releases stating that it will open in Neonopolis 'sometime' in 2010.

I wouldn't hold my breath waiting...

I undertsand Neonopolis si the Great White Elephant on Fremont Street. Everything else downtown, or at least around the Fremont Street Experience area, seems to be doing well, except Neonopolis. It seems every city has some large, failed mall, though usually it fails due to a bad location or the lack of a good anchor store.

Still, a big draw ia a big draw. So the question is: how many people would visit the Trek rides? Judging from the audience I saw at the Hilton in 08, a great many who are not Trek fans (Trek fans wouldn't laugh at the plot). What I mean is the Trek exhibit may save Neonopolis, if it ever opens.

BTW I never understood why they chose Vgeas for this attraction. You'd think it was better suited to Universal Studios or the Disney/MGM Park (which of course are not Paramount properties, but Disney/MGM has another Paramount-brand attraction: Indiana Jones)

Quote: Nareed

Quote: DJTeddyBear

Don't believe everything you read on the internet.

You can still, easily, pull up press releases that state that it will open on 5/8/9 in Neonopolis. The opening would coincide with the opening of the movie.

FYI: Neonopolis is a retail mall, with 11 movie theaters, adjacent to Freemont.

Instead, the Experience never opened, and, ironically, the theater closed on 5/8/9. Some of the stores are still open.



Now you can find plenty of press releases stating that it will open in Neonopolis 'sometime' in 2010.

I wouldn't hold my breath waiting...

I undertsand Neonopolis si the Great White Elephant on Fremont Street. Everything else downtown, or at least around the Fremont Street Experience area, seems to be doing well, except Neonopolis. It seems every city has some large, failed mall, though usually it fails due to a bad location or the lack of a good anchor store.

Still, a big draw ia a big draw. So the question is: how many people would visit the Trek rides? Judging from the audience I saw at the Hilton in 08, a great many who are not Trek fans (Trek fans wouldn't laugh at the plot). What I mean is the Trek exhibit may save Neonopolis, if it ever opens.

BTW I never understood why they chose Vgeas for this attraction. You'd think it was better suited to Universal Studios or the Disney/MGM Park (which of course are not Paramount properties, but Disney/MGM has another Paramount-brand attraction: Indiana Jones)

I missed it the first time and I have been dying for it to re-open at Neonopolis. However, after reading more about it, I stopped holding my breath.

In the meantime, if you're still holding your breath, here's a poor substitute that will provide a quick gulp of air:

http://www.trektoday.com/content/2009/11/virtual-star-trek-the-experience/
http://www.digitalproperties.ca/exp/

Quote: DJTeddyBear

You can still, easily, pull up press releases that state that it will open on 5/8/9 in Neonopolis. The opening would coincide with the opening of the movie.

Instead, the Experience never opened, and, ironically, the theater closed on 5/8/9.

I'd love to know what management was thinking. You had to beleive that the movie would be profitable, right? I mean, just how sucky was that theater that the management couldn't resolve to stay open for just a couple more weeks?

I used to meet with Benjamin Spillman (the reporter who used to write on downtown business for the Las Vegas Review Journal). He said someone asked him about this project almost daily. The Neonopolis mall is still in desperate financial shape.
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The owner of the Downtown Cocktail Room , the hip bar across the street, said he would gamble his bar on the ST experience never opening. He has stated publicly that he heard that the company that is storing the equipment is now suing because they haven't been paid.

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The movie theaters has to close when they did. Neonopolis got in a fight with their contractor and their air-conditioning was cut off. It was a sweat box in there. No one wants to go to movies in the summer without AC. Star Trek the Experience was going to try and open at the same time as the new movie opened. Basically if it ever opens is anyone's guess. All the restaurants that were supposed to open vanished. There were two that opened, but they have since closed.
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The casino next door Fitzgeralds is quietly on the market. It was put up to guarantee a $35 million bond last year. Right now it is geared at a fairly old clientelle with about half the machines as penny or nickel machines. I was thinking it might be a showcase for WMS gaming slot machines which prominently feature the Star Trek line of machines. WMS is the former video game company which is developing a lot of innovative slot games and is the darling company of the market right now. It might cater to the clients that want to go to Vegas for two days and the Star Trek Experience would be their primary destination. We have a latino casino, a gay casino, a lot of trendy casinos, so why not a nerd casino? Nerds have a lot of money.

Quote: pacomartin

We have a latino casino, a gay casino, a lot of trendy casinos, so why not a nerd casino? Nerds have a lot of money.

Ahem.

We're GEEKS, not nerds.


---


There's a gay casino?

Gay Lesbian Friendly is actually the proper term. When the depression started Harrah's starting marketing directly to GLBT customers. They got Barry Manilow to move over to their showroom at the Paris.

They also started marketing Rio directly to Brazilians and other Latinos. I don't think that is making much difference.

OK, a GEEK Casino. I figure that 7 million people watch NBC Chuck, and a lot more watch CBS Big Bang Theory. Stock up on Star Trek games. Special seminars with the Wizard. Invite the hottest geek heroines like "Summer Glau".

The average TWENTY-ONE table downtown makes $520 a day (231 tables). Now I am sure that the tables at Golden Nugget make a lot more than average.
==========================

I have a theory about blackjack which I would love to test. Perfect for a Geek Casino. You have a game where you must flatbet $100. After every hand a computer reads out the optimal strategy for each player. Whenever the recommended play deviates from basic strategy because of composition dependence or cards that have been previously played and changed the odds the readout explains the reason. At the end of the deck each player says the count, and the computer reads out the count using several different systems. Since it is only flatbetting at $100 the player can't use the count. I would think that single deck game with 90% penetration would make the players more excited.

By using a single deck and high penetration, you would guarantee that sometimes the count would be very high. This would keep players excited. At random intervals you would open up betting from $100 to $500 so that they could test their theory. The casino would run a risk on those times that the count will go high. But players will have to flatbet twenty or thirty times.

Any player who wins $9.9K is a winner. He must stop playing, but his name is added to the winner's board (if he wishes it could be some made up nickname).

The players would get a good game, and top notch training, and I am willing to bet those tables would earn several thousand per day because of the large bets.

Speaking of a geek casino, some years ago I mulled over a story idea for a science-fiction themed park. Not entirely disimilar from Niven's "Dream Park," but withour role-playing games and rides based on actual SF shows, movies and novels. I'd have set the park just outside Vegas. This, mind, before I ever went to Vegas (ok. I did go with my parents when I was 8 or so, but I really don't recall much of it). I may still do somehting with it if I can sort out the copyright issues. perforce I must make extensive use of Trek, Star Gate, Star Wars, two of Niven's novels, Asimov's Foundation, etc.

In the abstract, then, would such a theme park be suitable for Las Vegas? It would seem the idea of family entertainment didn't work for Sin City (sorry). On the other hand the Star Trek attraction did seem to have done well while it ran.

Quote: Nareed

In the abstract, then, would such a theme park be suitable for Las Vegas? It would seem the idea of family entertainment didn't work for Sin City (sorry). On the other hand the Star Trek attraction did seem to have done well while it ran.

Vegas seems to favor the 90 minute rule. If it's an act, musical, amusement, or anything it can't go over 90 minutes. It has to be a distraction, but they don't want you to be away from the tables for very long.

Quote: pacomartin

Vegas seems to favor the 90 minute rule. If it's an act, musical, amusement, or anything it can't go over 90 minutes. It has to be a distraction, but they don't want you to be away from the tables for very long.

I've noticed that. All the free sidewalk shows, including the Fremont Street Experience, are rather short, too. I dind't time them, but it felt like the Bellagio Fountians and the Sirens of TI are much shorter than the nightly fireworks show at Disney and Epcot.

Oh, well. My idea was the park would be the place for adults to drop off their children while they went on to the casinos. Having seen Vegas, I did notice very few children (except at Circus Circus and Excalibur), and a total lack of teenagers. So parents would just leave the kids home or send them to summer camp instead.

Anyway, any news on The Trek ride's future?

Quote: Nareed

Quote: pacomartin

Vegas seems to favor the 90 minute rule.

All the free sidewalk shows are rather short, too. It felt like the Bellagio Fountians and the Sirens of TI are much shorter than the nightly fireworks show at Disney and Epcot.

Hmmmm.... Free shows in a town where you're expected to risk several dollars per minute, vs. shows at a theme park with a very high gate price.

Yeah, the shows at Disney SHOULD be longer!


The free shows are just to get you in or near the door.

The '90 minute rule' is for stage shows that have admission costs. Give 'em value, but don't take them away from the casino for too long.

Ok, I concede I said something stupid. My bad.

Anwyay, not to beat on a dead horse (too much), but:

1) Does anyone know why the Hilton closed down the Trek ride/shops in the first place? and

2) Any more news about it's likely or unlikely future? I'm assuming Neonopolis is merely waiting for the wrecking crew.

Quote: Nareed

1) Does anyone know why the Hilton closed down the Trek ride/shops in the first place? and
2) Any more news about it's likely or unlikely future? I'm assuming Neonopolis is merely waiting for the wrecking crew.

Star Trek simply wasn't bringing in enough money to justify the costs. A lot of the stuff was getting old.
It's future is still the stuff of rumor. I doubt that Neonopolis will get the wrecking ball, simply because having an empty hole will probably be worse. The feeling is that Rohit Joshi is now playing an endgame with the city, where the city will end up giving him the parking garage, just to see some development. Gaming revenue downtown is about where it was in 1986 and non-gaming revenue is pretty bad also. Many of the casinos (except for those owned by Boyd corporation) are trying to minimize themselves as much as possible (i.e. close bars, not serve hot food at night, close restaurants, close hotel towers, etc.). The slot parlors (with no games) are no longer even open at night. One of the casinos, Las Vegas Club, has shut down half the casino and replaced it with a dance club called Foxy's. Amateur mixed martial arts is another event being held in the Plaza casino.

December 2009 gaming revenue was $36.2 million down almost 30% from two or three years earlier. What is particularly discouraging is that the Golden Nugget just opened there brand new 500 room hotel tower, the first tower since 1989. It was thought that at the very least table games would go up, but they set a new record low for downtown.

Part of the issue is that the Stratosphere is considered a downtown casino because it is inside the city limits of Las Vegas. Most people would consider it the extreme north end of the Las Vegas strip. All the north end casinos (Stratosphere, Sahara, Riviera, Circus Circus, Palace Station) are doing terrible, and are just barely staying open. With the massive oversupply of rooms and the empty chasm created by imploding the New Frontier and the Stardust, most people are finding inexpensive rooms at the southern end of the strip where it is easier to walk to more stuff. The north strip attractions tend toward the cheesy (NASCAR museum, Bite- the topless vampire show, Crazy Girls topless revue, Comedy Hypnotist, Comedy Stop, Adventure Dome, American Superstars, Sandy Hackett's Rat Pack Show, Magic and Tigers of Rick Thomas ).

Quote: Nareed

Speaking of a geek casino, some years ago I mulled over a story idea for a science-fiction themed park.

In the abstract, then, would such a theme park be suitable for Las Vegas? It would seem the idea of family entertainment didn't work for Sin City (sorry). On the other hand the Star Trek attraction did seem to have done well while it ran.

Attractions that you might spend 4-6 hours seemed to have all closed. Wet & Wild, and MGM GRAND park. Even movies are difficult to come by in a place that attracts 40 million people. Adventuredome at circus Circus is one of the few remaining such attractions, and it is bleeding money.

The economics is all moving at things that take you half and hour at most (Shark Reef at Mandalay Bay, roller coaster at NY-NY, SPEED the ride at roller coaster at Sahara, etc.) or shows that take 90 minutes at most. On a minute by minute basis these attractions are actually very expensive. Conventional wisdom is that Vegas like to distract people, but they don't want people to dwell on what they are doing since even a half hour at the slots are more cost effective to the resorts. I never saw Star Trek, the experience, but my impression was that it only occupied about 30 minutes of your time.

Quote: pacomartin

I never saw Star Trek, the experience, but my impression was that it only occupied about 30 minutes of your time.

You got the wrong impression. There were two attractions within: The Borg Invasion 4-D, and Klingon Encounter. Both feature live actors, and they lasted about 20 minutes each - after waiting in line.

When I went, the lines were very short. Maybe 15 minutes.

They designed the queues to be entertaining for extremely long lines. Instead of ropes & stands, they had 3 foot walls. And the tops of the walls were designed to look like the command console / railing of the bride on Next Generation. The artwork in the rail was the history of the 'known' universe. A lot of interesting historical stuff, as well as a lot of cool 'future history'. On the full length walls, were museum quality artifacts. Props and wardrobe actually.

My point is, depending on how much of a nerd you are, you could have taken your time and made a very enjoyable day of it.


Just outside the experience was Quark's - a restaurant. This, in my opinion, is where they really missed the boat.

On Deep Space Nine, Quark's was a bar with some gambling. It was a 24th century version of an old western saloon.

At the Hilton, Quark's was just a restaurant, with menu item names taken from Star Trek. I.E. Romulan Ale. Klingon Blood Pie. The food was OK, but the concept very disappointing.

I, for one, am very disappointed that I missed out on this. Drinking a bottle of 2309 while playing Dabo (roulette) would have made my life worth living.

You know what's sad? I actually knew 2309 without looking it up.

Quote: ahiromu

You know what's sad? I actually knew 2309 without looking it up.

That IS sad.

I didn't even know that Dabo was Roulette!

I went in mid-May 2008. There weren't many people, but then May isn't high season in Vegas. There were no lines, bu there was a wait for the next turn at each ride. At the time you could ride as many times as you wanted with the same ticket.

Yes, Quark's in the series included a casino, but I can't see a Trek casino having any reasonable success. I mean, had there been more Trekkies going to Vegas, the attraction would have been much more successful. They might have put a few Trek-themed slots nearby, possibly a Trek-themed table game a well.

Well yeah, I wouldn't expect them to have REAL dabo. Dabo is like roulette, but different, it's never really been released exactly how it's played. I think it would be neat if they had something called "dabo" but it's really just a double zero electronic roulette wheel as well as maybe a 5 card draw game like they played in next generation. The few people who like it, would really eat it up.

Quote: ahiromu

Well yeah, I wouldn't expect them to have REAL dabo. Dabo is like roulette, but different, it's never really been released exactly how it's played.

Just one more of the gazillion Trek details never detailed. I'm sure millions of words have been exchanged by Trekkies, to put it mildly, arguing about its exact nature.

Quote: ahiromu

I think it would be neat if they had something called "dabo" but it's really just a double zero electronic roulette wheel as well as maybe a 5 card draw game like they played in next generation. The few people who like it, would really eat it up.

As I recall, the Hilton had two, and only two, Trek-themed slots at their casino. I saw more than that in 09 at IP and other places, but these were newer slots.

On a review I posted elsewhere, I called Star Trek The Experience a miniature Trekkie heaven. Thinking back on it it's a miniature near-Trekkie heaven. If it were heaven, they'd have the original series rather than Voyager ;P

Seriously it may be Trek's no longer popular outside of the long-time enthusiasts. That may have made the Vegas rides less popular over time. It's too bad. I'm past my Trekkie days, but I did enjoy visiting the Enterprise's bridge, and the transporter effect remains unique among thrill rides. I also liked how the Klingon ride ended with a phaser fight over Las Vegas.

Alert, Saturday , April 10, 2010 10 a.m.-3 p.m. at a storage facility on 66 Spectrum Blvd., Las Vegas, 89101.
Purchase a Klingon!

They are selling some Star Trek the Experience stuff. In theory this does not mean that the revival of the production is dead, but they are simply selling some of the excess props.

"It's dead, Jim!"

When I was in Vegas last year, I was surprised to see that the Star Trek Experience facade was still attached to the exterior of the Hilton. So when in town last week, I had to check to see if it had been removed yet. Yeah, it's still there, and not difficult at all to get close up.

Taken from the last monorail window while at the station.
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Taken from the monorail platform.
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Taken from the sidewalk.
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This is me, reaching up to touch the bottom of the facade.
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After taking the picture, the person that shot it remarked that there's STE stuff inside. It hadn't occured to me to simply walk in and check. Duh!

I had no idea what to expect, except that the attractions would be gone. I was hoping they left behind the timeline railing for the attraction queues, but it was gone. It looked like anything not permanently attached to the building was gone, as if to say that the stuff that was left behind was easier or cheaper to abandon than to remove.

The decor is futuristic, but you can't exactly pin it to Star Trek.

Personally, I get the futuristic feel to the decor, but having big screen images of a Bruce Sprinsteen video kinda kills the effect.
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On one wall is something that is supposed to make you think it's a Dilithium crystal. But true trekies know that Dilithium crystals are not crstaline. Whatever. They made an attempt....
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The rest rooms have a futuristic look with all stainless steel fixtures. When you step up to the urinal, the blinky lights above it blink more and some audio track plays, but it's an old recording and hard to hear. I did hear something about a sensor scan, and a mention of a Damon, so that's definately Ferengi / Star Trek, but it was lame at best. I didn't bother to see what happens if I enter a stall.
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Quark's restaurant is gone, but there is a futuristic themed bar there named Spacequest Casino. I was there in the afternoon, so I don't know if it gets any business later.
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There are a bunch of slot machines in the area, including four Star Trek machines. Personally, I think having Star Trek machines in the Star Trek Experience casino ruins the illusion. And I felt that way when I was there about 8 years ago too. Whatever.
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The most obvious Star Trek tie-in is the lettering over the exit doorway specifying "Monorail Station". It uses a Star Trek font.
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The most out-of-place item in the entire place is this spacesuit. It looks like a relic from some 1950's movie. And they put a Hilton logo on the helmet....
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Bottom line, if you're a little kid, you might think it's cool - but in a cool, futuristic sort of way. The only cool thing a trekkie would see, is the STE sign outside the building. Maybe that's why they left it up....

About the urinals: they make some goofy reference to scanning your urine. Something like "fluid analysis shows increased winning potential. Good luck!"

The Hilton has been a favorite spot of my wife and me, but less so with every year. We actually just finished watching a DS9 episode when I found this thread.

In 2005 we were in Vegas on our honeymoon. The Star-Trek casino area was PERFECTION. They had *penny* 9/6 Jacks or Better. We had just finished school and I didn't have a job yet, so penny machines were much preferred. A $5 bill could last for days. We could sit there, with full view of cheesy 80's music videos on the big screens. The drinks kept coming. Best of all, fully costumed, in-character Klingons, Vulcans, and Ferengi would periodically stop by to chat.

But like most things in Vegas, it gets less cool with each passing year. First, the Star Trek attraction shut down, so the characters were gone. Then they moved the machines so the JoB no longer faced the TVs. Now, it seems like half of the machines are gone and they only intermittently show the videos.

BTW, she's the perfect wife. She likes Star Trek more than I do. Not that I'm that big of a Trekkie, but that's a rare quality to find in a beautiful woman.

To reiterate:

"It's dead, Jim!"

I'd think, "Its life Jim, but not as we know it."

Quote: dudestupid

BTW, she's the perfect wife. She likes Star Trek more than I do. Not that I'm that big of a Trekkie, but that's a rare quality to find in a beautiful woman.

Lucky man,

The happiest man in the world has an American salary, a British house, a Japanese wife, and eats Chinese food.
The saddest man in the world has a Chinese salary, a Japanese house, an American wife, and eats British food.

Quote: pacomartin

The saddest man ... eats British food.

I think I should feel offended.

Quote: Croupier

I think I should feel offended.

Don't take it too seriously. It's an old joke and refers to the days when British food was completely without any spice.

It's like the movie with Penelope Cruz where in heaven everyone speaks French, in hell everyone speaks English, on the real world everyone speaks Spanish, and the demons carry Swiss passports.

The movie is called Don't Tempt Me (Spanish: Bendito Infierno, also known as Sin noticias de Dios in Spanish and No News From God in English) and is a 2001 Mexican and Spanish co-production comedy film.

I know, I was just yanking your chain.

Heaven and Hell

Heaven Is Where:

The French are the chefs
The Italians are the lovers
The British are the police
The Germans are the mechanics
And the Swiss make everything run on time

Hell is Where:

The British are the chefs
The Swiss are the lovers
The French are the mechanics
The Italians make everything run on time
And the Germans are the police

Another old joke

An American consultant was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellowfin tuna. The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them.

The Mexican replied, “Only a little while.”

The American then asked, “Why don’t you stay out longer and catch more fish?

The Mexican said, “Well, I catch enough to feed my family.”

The American then asked, “But what do you do with the rest of your time?”

The Mexican fisherman said, “I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siesta with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos, I have a full and busy life, senor.”

The American scoffed, “I am a Harvard graduate and could help you with a new Business Plan. You should spend more time fishing and with the proceeds, buy a bigger boat with the proceeds from the bigger boat you could buy several boats eventually you would have a fleet of fishing boats. Instead of selling your catch to a middleman you would sell directly to the processor, eventually opening your own cannery. You would control the product, processing and distribution. You would need to leave this small coastal fishing village and move to Mexico City, then LA and eventually NYC where you will run your expanding enterprise.”

The Mexican fisherman asked, “But senor, how long will this all take?”

To which the American replied, “15-20 years to realise the business plan.”

“But what then, senor?”

The American laughed and said, “That’s the best part. When the time is right you would announce an IPO and sell your company stock to the public and become very rich, you would make millions.”

“Millions, senor? Then what?”

The American said, “Then you would retire. Move to a small coastal fishing village where you would sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, take siesta with your wife, stroll to the village in the evenings where you could sip wine and play your guitar with your amigos.”

I'm kind of taking a step back in the thread, but I just read the whole thing...

PART of the reason that STE closed was because Paramount sold its theme parks (ie King's Island, King's Dominion) to CedarFair (owners of Cedar Point). The costs of running the live shows were prohibitive, but my understanding was that CedarFair decided that it didn't really fit into the portfolio and sold off STE, with the intentions of reopening at Neonopolis. Obviously, that never happened...

As far as the attraction itself, I went a few times and really enjoyed myself, even though I'm not a Trekkie at all. I found the museum of the future fascinating, simply b/c it tried to use a bunch of stories and connect them into one.

To the comments about the casino stuff being left up and the signs... I imagine the amount of space that the attraction took up (The original ride was on shown on an IMAX type screen) could easily be converted to casino space, storage, etc. However, given the state of the economy, it's probably not in LVH best interests to try to convert it. If they can pay homage to a successful part of the history (at least for the first few years), and space theming is kind of cool, albeit out of place, so why not leave all the decor up?

It's too bad that it came to an end... that really was a lot of fun

A big part of the reason it closed was because of low attendance.

I was there on a Sunday (OK - Mother's Day) about 8 years ago. The wait to get in the attractions was less than 10 minutes.

Although I didn't go exploring too much, the area that retains the STE decor was the area that had the casino and Quarks Restaurant. The attraction area has been re-deployed.

When I was at the STE, in 2007, it was a weekday, and while the line to get in the attractions was handled quicky with only a 15 min wait, the place was packed out. Quark's restaurant had a 30 minute wait to be seated, and then another 30 minutes for your first sniff of food, which was advised by the staff. Their onion rings (Rings of Betazed in think) were amazing, and the James "Tea" kirk coctail was fantastic.

Another variation of the joke:

Canada could have had French food, American technology, and British culture.
Instead they ended up with British food, French technology, and American culture.