Witnessing a vulturegasm!

So I'm at Sam's Town, and I got a 30X multiplier for Old Fart Day--very unusual. I decided to play some short-pay nickel Ultimate X. There's a bank of six machines near where the FPDW used to be. So I'm playing the leftmost machine, when this guy skulks in and starts checking all the multipliers. On each machine. For each denomination. For each game. One by one. The entire process takes him a good twenty minutes. He finds nothing, or at least nothing to suit his fancy. He oozes away.

An hour later, he's back. I'm still on the same machine. The other machines are still empty. He checks all the multipliers on each machine. For every game. For every denomination. He finds nothing, so he oozes away again.

At this point, I'm wondering: does he do this every day? For how long? He appears to be on an hourly schedule, so given that this is the only bank of Ultimate X in the casino and there are no other casinos within walking distance, what does he do in the meantime? Nurse a cup of coffee at McDonald's? Check all the slots for uncashed credits? Go through the dumpsters out back?

An hour later (I was up $50 and was enjoying the game), he came back. He started his methodical checking again with the machine next to me. I couldn't stand it. I said, "Look, I know what you're looking for, and there hasn't been anyone playing these machines since the last time you checked. You're wasting your time, and hardly anyone leaves multipliers on these machines anyway--they play them off before they quit." He shot me a venomous glance and snarled, "Mind your own bleepity blankity business." That it was a mistake on my part to have said anything was shown when I got a whiff of his breath. It was like a dead cat.

Anyway, he proceeded down the row of machines and lo! he found a 2X multiplier on one line of the .25 Triple Play Double Bonus game--he must have missed it before. He shot me a triumphant look and extracted a urine-soaked $5 bill from his pocket--or somewhere in his pants--and fed it into the machine. His pupils dilated and he was breathing hard as he anticipated the windfall of the extra $1.25 in EV. Alas, the machine dealt him 98752, mixed suits, and after an agony of indecision, he went for the inside straight (the proper play! Good on yer, mate!), and whiffed all three times. He cashed out his remaining $1.25 and left, without even checking the other machines one more time--swearing and mumbling as he went.

I felt soooooo sorry for him. Three hours' (at least) worth of effort, then he finds his $1.25 pot of gold, and he LOSES $3.75--his entire weekly budget, no doubt, in the attempt. I wondered: how will he afford flea powder now?

Edit: actually, there are a few scattered UX nearby, so he may have been making the rounds. I think it would be absolutely hilarious if he found an active 12X multiplier on all ten lines of a dollar game and didn't have the cash to play it. He'd probably still be there a week later, sitting on top of the machine and sucking his thumb.

Just curious - seems like it would be hard to know it was urine soaked- you seem to be a very angry person

Good story. I get a kick out of the desperate vultures.

That was a fun read, thanks!

He goes between Eastside Cannery and Sams Town. At least he is not on the corner with a cardboard sign.

Why do you think nobody wanted to play beside you?

Quote: Joeshlabotnik

So I'm at Sam's Town, and I got a 30X multiplier for Old Fart Day--very unusual. I decided to play some short-pay nickel Ultimate X. There's a bank of six machines near where the FPDW used to be. So I'm playing the leftmost machine, when this guy skulks in and starts checking all the multipliers. On each machine. For each denomination. For each game. One by one. The entire process takes him a good twenty minutes. He finds nothing, or at least nothing to suit his fancy. He oozes away.

An hour later, he's back. I'm still on the same machine. The other machines are still empty. He checks all the multipliers on each machine. For every game. For every denomination. He finds nothing, so he oozes away again.

At this point, I'm wondering: does he do this every day? For how long? He appears to be on an hourly schedule, so given that this is the only bank of Ultimate X in the casino and there are no other casinos within walking distance, what does he do in the meantime? Nurse a cup of coffee at McDonald's? Check all the slots for uncashed credits? Go through the dumpsters out back?

An hour later (I was up $50 and was enjoying the game), he came back. He started his methodical checking again with the machine next to me. I couldn't stand it. I said, "Look, I know what you're looking for, and there hasn't been anyone playing these machines since the last time you checked. You're wasting your time, and hardly anyone leaves multipliers on these machines anyway--they play them off before they quit." He shot me a venomous glance and snarled, "Mind your own bleepity blankity business." That it was a mistake on my part to have said anything was shown when I got a whiff of his breath. It was like a dead cat.

Anyway, he proceeded down the row of machines and lo! he found a 2X multiplier on one line of the .25 Triple Play Double Bonus game--he must have missed it before. He shot me a triumphant look and extracted a urine-soaked $5 bill from his pocket--or somewhere in his pants--and fed it into the machine. His pupils dilated and he was breathing hard as he anticipated the windfall of the extra $1.25 in EV. Alas, the machine dealt him 98752, mixed suits, and after an agony of indecision, he went for the inside straight (the proper play! Good on yer, mate!), and whiffed all three times. He cashed out his remaining $1.25 and left, without even checking the other machines one more time--swearing and mumbling as he went.

I felt soooooo sorry for him. Three hours' (at least) worth of effort, then he finds his $1.25 pot of gold, and he LOSES $3.75--his entire weekly budget, no doubt, in the attempt. I wondered: how will he afford flea powder now?

Edit: actually, there are a few scattered UX nearby, so he may have been making the rounds. I think it would be absolutely hilarious if he found an active 12X multiplier on all ten lines of a dollar game and didn't have the cash to play it. He'd probably still be there a week later, sitting on top of the machine and sucking his thumb.

He's obviously really new to doing this or he's a VERY slow learner because there's absolutely no reason to check the same machines that haven't been played in between his last checks, the amount of the last cashout should be displayed on the machine. He could/should make a TITO for 1.25 or whatever and put that TITO in while he checks the first time or anytime he checks a new one. This would save him from having to check an unplayed machine.

If he found a 12x multiplier he could just short coin it or have the machine locked up for a while until he found another hustler and made a deal.

As MaxieP said, at least he's trying to do something short of begging for money.

You don't know his circumstances, so be careful judging him. I know a couple of very intelligent people who started out credit hustling. They had a strange series of events that took them on that path. They parlayed that into advantage play and huge bankrolls and ended up becoming fierce very successful advantage players who could put many guys to shame. They might even laugh at some guy playing a .5 short-pay nickel Ultimate X on a 30x point multiplier day as they just won 20k for the day.

Quote: onenickelmiracle

Why do you think nobody wanted to play beside you?

Why do you think it was necessary to make a comment like that?

That aside, I WISH no one ever wanted to play beside me. The actuality is that I seem to attract drunks and stinkarette smokers the way a dog attracts fleas. Every nutball who mumbles to his personal gods before hitting the draw button, bashes the deal button like he was playing whack-a-mole, or taps and pounds on the screen--if there are two people playing in the entire casino, and I am one of them, the other one will be such a person and will be playing right next to me.

Quote: MaxPen

He goes between Eastside Cannery and Sams Town. At least he is not on the corner with a cardboard sign.

I'm given to understand that the cardboard sign gig is MUCH more lucrative than vulturing UX on an hourly basis, so he's making an unwise career choice. Obviously, six years at Harvard Business School didn't teach him anything.

And if he was on the corner with a cardboard sign, he'd be much harder to smell.

Quote: Joeshlabotnik

I'm given to understand that the cardboard sign gig is MUCH more lucrative than vulturing UX on an hourly basis, so he's making an unwise career choice. Obviously, six years at Harvard Business School didn't teach him anything.

And if he was on the corner with a cardboard sign, he'd be much harder to smell.

I'm sure marrying a wealthy old lady might be might be much more lucrative than many other career choices, but it doesn't mean someone wants to do that. He might have an issue with begging for money or it's just to hot outside.

Quote: Joeshlabotnik

--if there are two people playing in the entire casino, and I am one of them, the other one will be such a person and will be playing right next to me.

Same for bars. I vape/smoke and the person gets all upset. Bish there's 5000 different machines go play those. PS jump off a bridge (not you but the people who do this)

The people who smoke indoors? Please do.

Quote: djatc

Same for bars. I vape/smoke and the person gets all upset. Bish there's 5000 different machines go play those. PS jump off a bridge (not you but the people who do this)

They should go to a non smoking bar or casino (-;

Quote: AxelWolf

They should go to a non smoking bar or casino (-;

I don't understand it. It's a casino, there's gonna be drinking, gambling, smoking, and all those things. Some casinos have non-smoking areas, so they can go there and gamble. I don't like "service" (another BS issue but whatevs) dogs near me, so if I'm next to one I'll move or put up with it if I really want that machine.

Although the non-smoking areas usually have crappy games, but that's not my problem.

Ate a restaurant last weekend and was asked if I wanted smoking or non. It has been a decade since I have been asked that.

Quote: GWAE

Ate a restaurant last weekend and was asked if I wanted smoking or non. It has been a decade since I have been asked that.

Were you in Missouri? That is the last place that I remember seeing smoking in a restaurant.

Quote: GWAE

Ate a restaurant last weekend and was asked if I wanted smoking or non. It has been a decade since I have been asked that.

That's one of many reasons I would never live in a redneck flyover state. Social advancement is retarded there. Vegas casinos are supposed to be one of those places where you can misbehave, and from a social as well as a legal standpoint in most of the US, smoking indoors in public is misbehavior.

I would like to give smokers the benefit of the doubt, in that they may not realize just how offensive and annoying stinkarette smoke really is. Sitting next to a smoker is like sitting next to someone with horrible body odor and uncontrollable flatulence.

I don't buy the "it's a casino, so it's OK to smoke" argument. Sure, it's legal, but it's also offensive and inconsiderate. It's legal for me to have a loud cell phone conversation in a restaurant, or for that matter, whip out my trombone while I'm playing video poker and practice between hands, but common decency dictates that I shouldn't. That's why I've gone ballistic when some smoke pig sits down next to me, lights up, and when I have the colossal effrontery to wave the smoke away from my face, tells me, "it's a casino."

Apropos of that, whatever happened to "mind if I smoke"? When was it replaced with "up yours, I'm gonna smoke, my addiction is more important than your health or comfort"?

Quote: Joeshlabotnik

That's one of many reasons I would never live in a redneck flyover state. Social advancement is retarded there. Vegas casinos are supposed to be one of those places where you can misbehave, and from a social as well as a legal standpoint in most of the US, smoking indoors in public is misbehavior.

I would like to give smokers the benefit of the doubt, in that they may not realize just how offensive and annoying stinkarette smoke really is. Sitting next to a smoker is like sitting next to someone with horrible body odor and uncontrollable flatulence.

I don't buy the "it's a casino, so it's OK to smoke" argument. Sure, it's legal, but it's also offensive and inconsiderate. It's legal for me to have a loud cell phone conversation in a restaurant, or for that matter, whip out my trombone while I'm playing video poker and practice between hands, but common decency dictates that I shouldn't. That's why I've gone ballistic when some smoke pig sits down next to me, lights up, and when I have the colossal effrontery to wave the smoke away from my face, tells me, "it's a casino."

Apropos of that, whatever happened to "mind if I smoke"? When was it replaced with "up yours, I'm gonna smoke, my addiction is more important than your health or comfort"?

I haven't agreed with alot of your previous posts,but I'm with you on this one 100%.

Quote: Joeshlabotnik

That's one of many reasons I would never live in a redneck flyover state. Social advancement is retarded there. Vegas casinos are supposed to be one of those places where you can misbehave, and from a social as well as a legal standpoint in most of the US, smoking indoors in public is misbehavior.

I would like to give smokers the benefit of the doubt, in that they may not realize just how offensive and annoying stinkarette smoke really is. Sitting next to a smoker is like sitting next to someone with horrible body odor and uncontrollable flatulence.

I don't buy the "it's a casino, so it's OK to smoke" argument. Sure, it's legal, but it's also offensive and inconsiderate. It's legal for me to have a loud cell phone conversation in a restaurant, or for that matter, whip out my trombone while I'm playing video poker and practice between hands, but common decency dictates that I shouldn't. That's why I've gone ballistic when some smoke pig sits down next to me, lights up, and when I have the colossal effrontery to wave the smoke away from my face, tells me, "it's a casino."

Apropos of that, whatever happened to "mind if I smoke"? When was it replaced with "up yours, I'm gonna smoke, my addiction is more important than your health or comfort"?

Non-smoking section. Smokers in there will be asked to leave. Problem solved. If you want to play the trombone next to me IDGAF. If I'm on a good play I'll stick around, if not I'll leave.

Hollywood Toledo actually put slot machines on the outdoor smoking patios for the truly addicted.

Quote: Joeshlabotnik

Sure, it's legal, but it's also offensive and inconsiderate.

Kinda like some of your posts.

Quote: DRich

Were you in Missouri? That is the last place that I remember seeing smoking in a restaurant.

Close, Arkansas

Quote: bobbartop

Kinda like some of your posts.

Lol

Quote: bobbartop

Kinda like some of your posts.

Lmao, there goes my Michelob.

Quote: Joeshlabotnik

That's one of many reasons I would never live in a redneck flyover state. Social advancement is retarded there.

Wow, you can generalize a whole region with the word retarded? I take huge offense to that.

He's not offensive.
He's controversial.
Reminds me of Trump ;-)

Quote: Joeshlabotnik
That's one of many reasons I would never live in a redneck flyover state. Social advancement is retarded there.

Quote: beerseason

Wow, you can generalize a whole region with the word retarded? I take huge offense to that.

I think it's fair to say Joe used the word in its correct dictionary definition way, meaning "slow" or "slower than", not "retarded" as slang for the people who live there. "Social advancement is slower there than other parts of the US." would be equivalent. No flag.

Not that I agree with him. There are considerate smokers, even in smoking areas. And yes, there are rude ones. In my experience, most are considerate. And I really appreciate Arkansas, Mississippi, Missouri, and other holdouts who try and serve all their patrons, not just the smug or whiny non-smokers who demand everyone stop everywhere they go. Consideration goes both ways, including most non-smokers I know.

Smoking outdoors is considerate. No such thing as polite indoor smoking IMO. Just ranges from mildly inconsiderate to complete jerkoff. In 20 years won't be allowed anywhere indoors but native casinos or the privacy of your home . Where's the time machine.

Quote: bobbartop

Kinda like some of your posts.

And yours. And those of many others. But you're making a pretty stupid comparison. Unlike cigarette smoking:

1. You can easily avoid reading any or all of my posts if you choose, and without ceasing your activities in this forum. The only way you can avoid cigarette smoke in a casino is to leave, or to play in a tiny nonsmoking alcove with bad machines.
2. My posts--and yours--won't affect anyone's health.
3. My posts--and yours--won't irritate, annoy, or distract anyone if they choose not to be so affected.
4. My posts--and EVEN yours (wait, let me think about that for a bit...well...OK, even yours, yeah) may have some amusement or other value to some people; secondhand cigarette smoke doesn't have any value for anybody.

So Bob, once again you have failed the logic test. You do have my sympathy :)

Quote: beerseason

Wow, you can generalize a whole region with the word retarded? I take huge offense to that.

Many well-known dictionaries are available online for free.

How about starting a smoking thread instead of vulturing this one.

Good idea

Quote: Ibeatyouraces

Hollywood Toledo actually put slot machines on the outdoor smoking patios for the truly addicted.

Add Scioto Downs, Rocky Gap, Hollywood Columbus and I'm sure a few others to that list, those are just the ones I've seen. Actually, Rocky Gap might just be a smoking section rather than a patio, don't remember.

Quote: mcallister3200

Smoking outdoors is considerate. No such thing as polite indoor smoking IMO. Just ranges from mildly inconsiderate to complete jerkoff. In 20 years won't be allowed anywhere indoors but native casinos or the privacy of your home . Where's the time machine.

I disagree, I just ask the people around me if it's the smoking section in a casino whether or not my smoking would bother them. Seems polite enough to me.

Quote: beerseason

Wow, you can generalize a whole region with the word retarded? I take huge offense to that.

interesting term "flyover country". It strikes me as a judgement of places that you've only seen from a plane, not actually experienced. Using the term seems to declare your ignorance.

"We got amber waves of grain and bathtub speed. We even got Starebucks. What else you need?" - REK

Quote: JimRockford

interesting term "flyover country". It strikes me as a judgement of places that you've only seen from a plane, not actually experienced. Using the term seems to declare your ignorance.

"We got amber waves of grain and bathtub speed. We even got Starebucks. What else you need?" - REK

And saying that shows YOUR ignorance. How do you know where I have and haven't been? What "strikes" you has little to do with reality.

Quote: Joeshlabotnik

And saying that shows YOUR ignorance. How do you know where I have and haven't been? What "strikes" you has little to do with reality.

I don't care where you've been. Don't take it so personally. My point is, the term suggests a vast region not worth considering beyond a space to that must be traversed to get from one coast to the other. It implies a willful ignorance.

Quote: Joeshlabotnik

And saying that shows YOUR ignorance. How do you know where I have and haven't been? What "strikes" you has little to do with reality.

His using the term "your ignorance" seemed generic to me. I don't think you need to take it personal, he's addressing the term "flyover country", and he is correct about that. And you brought it up. Relax, no one's out to get you.

Quote: Mission146

I disagree, I just ask the people around me if it's the smoking section in a casino whether or not my smoking would bother them. Seems polite enough to me.

Asking is a nice courtesy. You probably also do a courtesy exhale straight up into the air. The problem for us non smokers is when that smoke rolling off your idle cigarette makes a beeline right into our face. I'm not going to get all pissy and wave my hand in front of my face just because you're smoking, I'm doing it because there's stinky smoke all up in my face. And for non smokers that's certainly near the bottom of the list of situations we would choose to be in.

Quote: BTLWI

Asking is a nice courtesy. You probably also do a courtesy exhale straight up into the air. The problem for us non smokers is when that smoke rolling off your idle cigarette makes a beeline right into our face. I'm not going to get all pissy and wave my hand in front of my face just because you're smoking, I'm doing it because there's stinky smoke all up in my face. And for non smokers that's certainly near the bottom of the list of situations we would choose to be in.

This exactly. I don't mind smokers/smoking per se. But when the ventilation in the casino happens to circulate the air so that it goes straight from the cigarette directly into my face, it's definitely annoying but not enough for me personally to make a scene about it or anything.

Quote: Ibeatyouraces

Hollywood Toledo actually put slot machines on the outdoor smoking patios for the truly addicted.

JACK Cincinnati (when it was Horseshoe) did the same thing. It was worse than a typical smoking casino because 70%+ of the ~200 machines were occupied and everyone one lit up obviously. I wanted craft beer though, and that was the only place in the casino where they served it...D'Oh! I bailed the area quick once I bought my beer, but the difference between there in the non-smoking area was night and day unlike most set-ups.

Quote: DRich

Were you in Missouri? That is the last place that I remember seeing smoking in a restaurant.

Varies locally around here. Fortunately the restaurants we typically go to have either banned it voluntarily, or must due to local law.