Advice on long distance relationship

Hello Wizard :) You've got some great posts! Maybe you can help me too...
I first met my boyfriend shortly 7 years ago, we liked each other but that wasn't the right time for us, something that we both knew and I took the decision to not continue with our friendship and we both respected that. We live in different countries and on the 1st of jan last year he found me on facebook. He spent a few months being totally adorable chatting and sending me emails and I began to like him a lot and accepted to have a relationship with him. He visited me twice and we had a wonderful time together and all past year was very dedicated, loving and understanding. While our possibilities of living together require time because I could only think of changing country next year due to circumstances that we both understand, our long distance relationship has been going wonderfully until recently. He has started a new job a few weeks ago that is like the culmination of his life career and we communicate less now. I could feel that the intensity of our relationship decreased and I suggested a longer communication break than usual that he accepted easier than ever. I also realized that deciding for a moment to meet again has been several times postponed.
Last night I had a dream that he met another girl that seemed more beautiful, attractive and so successful and he was so impressed by her. I could feel some of his thoughts and feelings in my dream, he was full of admiration and wanted that girl to the extent that he felt that he had to choose between us. She chose another guy and he then understood that I was the one that was meant to be in his life. We were spending time together and he seemed to want our relationship to move to another level but was still thinking about her and became open about it. I told him that I could chose between giving him time to clarify himself or ending our relationship. And then I suddenly got upset and left feeling very sad and hurt...
Me telling you a dream might seem strange to you but I have had on many occasions dreams that have proved to be so true! Thing is I deeply love him now, he really has succeeded to conquer my heart. I think the possibility of meeting someone that could turn you upside down exists in everyone's life to some extent.
Could this be true? Can your intuition help, dear Wizard? If it's true what should I do?
Thank you! Enjoy your day!

I guess you know everyone answers these.

If your dream proves accurate, you will need to move on. The long distance means it is very likely *something* will go wrong. You need to have alternatives and not be tied to this. Your heart will heal.

Dreams are about how your mind feels, not the truth. So ignore the dream, please. That's just your own insecurities talking. Dreams come true because you allow them to.

For the facts at hand, he's starting a new job, and has cut you out of your life. Solve the issue at hand. It's worth another visit. Get your ass on a plane and go see him and figure out what you are going to do. It's easy to ignore someone over the phone.

Long distance relationships require dedication and nurturing. If you aren't talking on the phone at least 3-4 times a week and seeing him whenever you can (more than twice a year), you got nothin'. Move on.

First, I wouldn't put much stock in this dream, or any dream.

Second, intuition is not the only thing you should be listening to. What does your brain tell you to do? There needs to be a plan for one of you to move to be with the other. Who would making the lesser sacrifice to do so? Seven years is a long time. I think you need to come up with a plan or face the reality that the relationship is going nowhere and move on with your lives.

Assuming there is a long-term plan in place, any relationship is bound to have ups and downs. There are a host of reasonable explanations about why your BF has been distant lately, many of them reasonable. My advice is to give him his space.

I read a sociological study long ago the results of which are you usually marry someone within a 5 mile radius of your residence. Familiarity breeds.

Long distance only works if 1. you see each other, at least occasionally, and 2. if there is an end-goal, some period of time in the future where you will be together.

I made it through 4 years of long distance this way.

My wife and I lived 150 miles apart (and through the border) for 8 months before we moved in together. I saw her at least once a week and sometimes went there during the week. It's that dedication that's required to make it work.

I realize that soldiers, etc, are away from their loved ones for a long time, but that is AFTER the relationship has been well established. If you've rekindled online and have only managed to see each other twice in the last year, you've got little more than nothing. I doubt that he feels obligated to you.

However, if you insist on the long distance fare, then by own means, upgrade your technology to Skype or FaceTime so that you can *see* each other. Make sure you talk to each other more than 3 times a week, job or no. Save all of your sheckels and see each other more often.

Thank you all...Seven years ago when we first met he had a few weeks job in Portugal where I live. We hung out together innocently until I saw his wedding ring. It took me three days to see it. He told me he was unhappy in his marriage and thinking of separating and that he really liked me but I decided to stop seeing him. He called me and wrote a few times when he came back to Portugal and even from Holland but I didn't reply. So last year he found me on facebook. He still had my old telephone number, even a picture that he asked to be taken with his phone the first night we met 7 years ago. He had been divorced for four years, so he was a free man and he really wanted to know me better. I didn't want a relationship in the first months and I was clear about it but he insisted again and again. I must admit he was very charming! We proved each other last year in many ways that we are the right person for one another.

I think we might be facing our first crises now and relationships as you say have their ups and downs. My heart tells me to get closer to him but my mind tells me it might not be the right moment. He is very responsible at work and starting a new job puts a lot of pressure on him. It could also be that he simply needs some space. Or it could be that he has recently met someone quite spectacular that has got his attention, maybe more than that. I will be patient and time will tell. If there is a problem, I will confront it in the best possible way, we really have something special that is so much worth it. If we are somehow facing the end, it will be painful because I love him now with all my heart but I will survive, I know I will. We have met twice in life and on both occasions he needed me much more than I needed him.

Thank you for allowing me to speak about this, it was really important for me and for all your replies. Much joy on your way!

Lisbon to Amsterdam is 2,296km driving and a $222 3 hour flight. $222 for a weekend with your boyfriend is well worth it. I'd budget $222 a month and fly every month to see him. Meet him halfway in Bordeaux.

So right on the last comment, boymimbo :) It's very generous of all you, I think, to have taken the time to read my post and give me so good replies. And this is not really a relationship site and it has nothing to do with your real interests! Only explored the site and realized after I desperately posted my first comment on the obsessing dream. I appreciate it! Viva Las Vegas :)

Men will do anything for love. It doesn't seem like he loves you. Sorry.

Just an update :) I spent a week with terrible and painful doubts, feeling that we were suddenly disconnected, panicking, needing so much to ask what was happening but I felt that I had to control myself and project a different image. If he was distant because work or because he was charmed by somebody new or he just needed some space, me sounding desperate and controlling wouldn't have helped much. It was the most difficult and painful thing that I had to do since we've been together but it worked. I was many times joking when we chatted but I was crying in the same time and I sent him the most beautiful and loving texts and emails ever. He is coming back little by little and life is wonderful again. I understood that I love him more than I thought I did and sometimes relationships really try our limits of giving and understanding. I even had another dream exactly one week later around the same time in the morning in which he was sending me a love letter expressing his deep feelings for me. Immediately after that my phone rang and I woke up. I had just received a lovely good morning text from him and in that moment I simply knew that whatever the danger was, it was gone :)
Nice weekend and good luck to everyone!