How should I handle this?

My group is having a Christmas Grab-bag this year. (yes, the reason I asked odds on White Elephant) It is a "direcetd" grab-bag meaning you know who you buy for, you know who buys for you, and you ask for what you want. I elected not to participate for a few reasons among them:

1. Office politics is a problem where I work and I really don't want some names and I don't want some folks getting my name
2. Despite the politics I mentioned I really don't like "directed" gifts at work anywhere
3. I am trying to make an effort to minimize purchase and accumulation of "junk and trinkets" in my life. I'd rather we just give another small gift to the Salvation Army gifts-for-needy-kids or somehting.

The problem is a few people seem to want to ask "why" I opted-out. One asked if I "don't like Christmas" and another mentioned lack of teamwork to those who didn't opt in. I think it will come up again at some point. Clearly I don't want to mention #1 above. But what would anyone say to explain they don't like direct office gift exchanges?

Please, no mentions of "you brought this on yourself" I'd like a constructive thread as others might feel the same way.

God, that sounds like a horrible system.

Secret Santa is fine, as is a grab bag (with no take overs... that seems like a silly system... let people trade after the event if they want to).

This sounds like silly, silly way to make someone upset.

I have no idea how to respond, but I'd suggest the thrift aspect or "I'm donating my gift to XXXXX charity".

Quote: AZDuffman

what would anyone say to explain they don't like direct office gift exchanges?

I would tell them straight up, but temper it with reason number 3 above. There is nothing wrong with the truth. Perhaps you can "give" a donation to the SA or other charity in the name of the group to demonstrate your commitment to, "team spirit".

Don't give a specific reason for opting out. Just say "It's personal, and I'd rather not discuss it."

Quote: AZDuffman

Office politics is a problem where I work and I really don't want some names and I don't want some folks getting my name

I can sympathize, I work in a shrinking industry [shrinking jobs more than shrinking in share of economy] and I think I can testify that this escalates the general problem of fellow employee friction. We can barely be civil to each other anymore during this recession, and dirty tricks are at an all-time high.

You have to figure a bad recession can bring this on in places that didnt have such problems normally.