MY GUPPY IS GAY and OH, MY GOD!, ANOTHER IS A LESBIAN!

MY GUPPY IS GAY and OH, MY GOD!, ANOTHER IS A LESBIAN!

I have three fish tanks in my house: a five gallon tank with a Beta and five Guppies (this sits right here on my desk); a 20 gallon tank with 18 Guppies and 12 neon tetras; and a 55 gallon tank with eight really big Angel fish and about 14 Platys. Although this is gruesome, my Angels have gotten huge because the Platys are livebearers and they constantly have babies which the Angels constantly eat. With flake food and Platy babies my Angels have a good, clean, healthy diet. The 55 gallon tank is right behind me.

So the five and 55 gallon tank are in my office and the 20 gallon tank is in my dining room.

Today I got in an order of 12 more really, really fancy Guppies for my 20 gallon tank, four males and eight females You always need more females because the males are maniacs when it comes to sex --- they must have 100 orgasms a day!. Then I noticed something --- one of my new, magnificently beautiful male Guppies is gay, I kid you not.

After they got used to the tank, which for Guppies takes about five minutes, the other male Guppies were nailing the female Guppies all over the place. These fellows have constant boners. They are like 12-year-old human males.

But this Guppy didn’t go near a female. No. Instead he’d go under the male Guppies and try to copulate with them (dare I say this?) anally. I mean, Guppies do have, uh, openings and you should see how long and fearsome their do-do’s are and this guy was going for the exit. He totally ignored the females. (You cannot mistake a male Guppy for a female. They are two totally different looking fish.)

I watched for a good half hour and not once did he give a damn about the females scurrying all over the place trying to escape the rapaciousness of the other male Guppies. This guy just kept trying to plow the other guys. I’ve never seen anything like it. A gay fish! By the way, I have nothing against gay fish; I am very liberal about such things.

Then I noticed something else --- something amazing --- one of my new female Guppies was a lesbian, I swear to God. What the hell was going on? There was one female Guppy who fought --- and I mean went head to head --- with the male Guppies trying to, uh, court her. She was a tough gal. The male Guppies were much smaller and actually afraid of her. Of course, the raging boners of the males made them go to her time and again and she just violently shoed them away.

The male Guppies had to avoid the jabs of my gay Guppy and then they had to be really wary of the big female Guppy who seemed to have murder in her heart.

It is possible that this is an evolutionary breakthrough --- although I don’t know how the gay Guppy and the lesbian Guppy will reproduce more of their, uh, kind. I only have this to say, God created these Guppies so He must approve of them and want them to (you know) do whatever the hell they do.

(My new book “Confessions of a Wayward Catholic” is now available at Amazon.com)

Don't ask, don't tell.

Frank, it sounds to me as though your 55 gallon tank is representative of the real world. Not that one in four males are gay, although one can always hope. :-) As for your 1 in 8 female lesbo, population. 12% sounds high, but I know in the real world, those scary broads are all over the f***king place. You can't hardly turn around without getting beat up by one. Lol

Cool. Another fish guy. It's about time for another $1 per gallon sale at Petco.

I'm into rainbow fish. 6 foot 125 gallon tank that has old tank syndrome. Algae on the wood and back glass. It's an eyesore, but the fish are nice looking and colorful.

11 various rainbow. Red,yellow,emerald,millenium,others.
3 Roseline sharks
2 flying fox
1 angelfish
1 clown barb EDIT clown loach not barb. This guy took care of my snail problem. Had 1000's. Haven't seen one in 2 years.
1 rainbow shark.

High nitrates, low phosphates. A few Anubis, sword plants, and others. All fish are at least 2 years old a few are 3 and a couple at 4. I haven't lost a fish since the male angel killed his mate. Two hob filters. Penguin and whisper.

Been a lover of fish tanks since I was a little kid.

Gay & lesbian fish? Well, if they can vote then that helps explain how the most incompetent president in history got voted in for another term of more damage to the US!

Quote: tournamentking

Gay & lesbian fish? Well, if they can vote then that helps explain how the most incompetent president in history got voted in for another term of more damage to the US!

Re-election of the most incompetent president in history: I don't think the gay and lesbian fishies were responsible for George W's 2004 re-election. :-) (and I use the 're' in re-election generously...lo)

My gay and lesbian fish only vote for people with names such as Fischer, Fisher, Fishman, Fisherman and Barney Frank.

Quote: kewlj

Re-election of the most incompetent president in history: I don't think the gay and lesbian fishies were responsible for George W's 2004 re-election. :-) (and I use the 're' in re-election generously...lo)

I don't get it. you don't believe that Bush was re-elected in 2004? Are you refering to the electoral upset over the popular vote in 2000?

I used to breed guinea pigs and some of the males were either bisexual or all-the-way gay. Then again, once I put a horny male guinea pig in a rabbit cage, and these were rabbits the size of cats, and he humped them too.

You never can tell with animals. My buddy's dog fell in love with my leg. :( After awhile I had to give em an ass kicking to end his love affair.

Quote: Wizard

I used to breed guinea pigs and some of the males were either bisexual or all-the-way gay. Then again, once I put a horny male guinea pig in a rabbit cage, and these were rabbits the size of cats, and he humped them too.

It's obvious you guys have spent most your time around the city.

If you spend much time around an uncut billy goat you will think that guinea pig had good manner's.

Monkey's aren't much better, they act like that prisoner next to Hannibal Lecter. Nothing will make you hate the zoo like a bunch of feces flingin monkey's.

Quote: tournamentking

Gay & lesbian fish? Well, if they can vote then that helps explain how the most incompetent president in history got voted in for another term of more damage to the US!

Post of the decade! Well, also since 2008...

I know animals can be lecherous but I never saw fish like this. I just checked the 20 gallon tank and this guy was still going after the other guys. Maybe I have discovered a brand new fish behavior.

Quote: FrankScoblete

ANOTHER IS A LESBIAN!



Then I noticed something else --- something amazing --- one of my new female Guppies was a lesbian, I swear to God. What the hell was going on? There was one female Guppy who fought --- and I mean went head to head --- with the male Guppies trying to, uh, court her.

You can't call her a lesbian just because she fights off the 4 males in her tank, you don't know her past, maybe she loves someone from a previous tank, maybe the males are too fancy for her, she may like big, rough and tumble guppies.

Miles you may be right. All she does is fight off the males. She doesn't have any interest in the females.

I moved my guppy to the five gallon tank. It is he and four females. If you know guppies, the males just do it constantly but my guy ignores the women and seems more interested in the Beta in that tank.

I'm pretty sure this belongs in the Diversity Tomorrow forum.

Quote: Sabretom2

I'm pretty sure this belongs in the Diversity Tomorrow forum.

I agree. I'm closing this thread.