aceofspades
aceofspades
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March 27th, 2015 at 10:16:27 AM permalink
Back again to haunt AC - goal of trip is +3750
Trying to get a little back at a time before LV


LET'S DO THIS!!!
Joeman
Joeman
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March 27th, 2015 at 11:00:33 AM permalink
Best of luck, Ace! Go get 'em!

Hey, why stop @ +3750? I say keep winning til you own the Revel! :)
"Dealer has 'rock'... Pay 'paper!'"
Romes
Romes
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March 27th, 2015 at 11:04:15 AM permalink
Quote: Joeman

...Hey, why stop @ +3750? I say keep winning til you own the Revel! :)


Doesn't $100 and a smack on the ass get you the keys to Revel now days?

Ace, best of luck tonight! Stay sharp, stay hydrated, hit 'em hard and take no prisoners! Don't focus on how many in a row you're losing... Just move from hand to hand and worry about how many/much this/that after the shootin's done. Eagerly be awaiting the action... Good variance!
Playing it correctly means you've already won.
Face
Administrator
Face
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March 27th, 2015 at 11:09:33 AM permalink
But, Mousie, thou art no thy lane,
In proving foresight may be vain;
The best-laid schemes o' mice an' men
Gang aft agley,
And lea'e us nought but grief an' pain
For promised joy!

Still thou art blest, compar'd wi' me
The present only toucheth thee:
But, Och! I backward cast my e'e.
On prospects drear!
An' forward, tho' I canna see,
I guess an' fear!
The opinions of this moderator are for entertainment purposes only.
bj4fun
bj4fun
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March 27th, 2015 at 11:25:59 AM permalink
Good luck ACE!

Just got back from AC and had an decent trip. Of note (for you ACE), is one particular shoe I lost the first 11 hands! I stayed calm, played my game, and by the end of the shoe I was down just 1/2 a unit. Went on to have a nice win during that session.
aceofspades
aceofspades
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March 27th, 2015 at 11:56:23 AM permalink
Quote: bj4fun

Good luck ACE!

Just got back from AC and had an decent trip. Of note (for you ACE), is one particular shoe I lost the first 11 hands! I stayed calm, played my game, and by the end of the shoe I was down just 1/2 a unit. Went on to have a nice win during that session.




Wow glad you ended up making a comeback
losing 11 in a row -- I hear the pitter-patter of the mathletes running this way to tell you it didn't happen
aceofspades
aceofspades
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March 27th, 2015 at 11:59:52 AM permalink
Quote: Face

But, Mousie, thou art no thy lane,
In proving foresight may be vain;
The best-laid schemes o' mice an' men
Gang aft agley,
And lea'e us nought but grief an' pain
For promised joy!

Still thou art blest, compar'd wi' me
The present only toucheth thee:
But, Och! I backward cast my e'e.
On prospects drear!
An' forward, tho' I canna see,
I guess an' fear!



no plans - just wishful thinking
GWAE
GWAE
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March 27th, 2015 at 12:11:25 PM permalink
Quote: aceofspades

Wow glad you ended up making a comeback
losing 11 in a row -- I hear the pitter-patter of the mathletes running this way to tell you it didn't happen


oh come on, 11 is possible as long as it was on 1 table.

goood luck on the trip. Do me a favor, head on over to Ramseys new restaurant in Caesars and let me know if the Beef Wellington is worth a trip.
Expect the worst and you will never be disappointed. I AM NOT PART OF GWAE RADIO SHOW
Baccaratfrom79
Baccaratfrom79
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March 27th, 2015 at 12:11:52 PM permalink
I was told I better not post but whatever.

All the luck! I know you have a host but Ralph D. my host there will buy you dinner at Grotto and consider it me buying it! LOL, power of the comp. He guaranteed me tix to Bennett and Gaga concert in July as I text you about. So we are set. AC in late July, think it will be humid?

GOOD LUCK!
Bac79=Hazardous Material and Chemical person correcting other's mistakes. Non AP'er, I can't count cards, low intelligence. Sprinkles magical dust on the cards. Has a lucky monkey. Baby also has a green one. Sum it up: "It's okay just blame me, it's all my fault"! ( No one believes me--so I chose to stop posting)
1BB
1BB
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March 27th, 2015 at 1:00:36 PM permalink
Quote: Baccaratfrom79

I was told I better not post but whatever.

All the luck! I know you have a host but Ralph D. my host there will buy you dinner at Grotto and consider it me buying it! LOL, power of the comp. He guaranteed me tix to Bennett and Gaga concert in July as I text you about. So we are set. AC in late July, think it will be humid?

GOOD LUCK!



A reasonable person reading this could get the idea that you are being threatened or harassed by being told that you better not post. Is that the case? Did someone on this site actually tell you that? I hope not. Can you please elaborate?
Many people, especially ignorant people, want to punish you for speaking the truth. - Mahatma Ghandi
aceofspades
aceofspades
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March 27th, 2015 at 1:07:44 PM permalink
Was even through 3 1/2 shoes then just lost the last 11 of 14 hands in the 4th shoe
Baccaratfrom79
Baccaratfrom79
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March 27th, 2015 at 1:13:09 PM permalink
Yes, I classified them as banter. I erased my whole inbox and lost a couple of numbers I wanted. I was on here trying to find her name on the AC Board and seen Ace was going down to AC again..Not threats I never said that, come on. Anyways, only on here to wish AoS great luck and keep it positive pls. I was on here trying to find that lady at the Borgata but I got my problem solved a few min's ago. I don't post anywhere else, give it a break man.
Bac79=Hazardous Material and Chemical person correcting other's mistakes. Non AP'er, I can't count cards, low intelligence. Sprinkles magical dust on the cards. Has a lucky monkey. Baby also has a green one. Sum it up: "It's okay just blame me, it's all my fault"! ( No one believes me--so I chose to stop posting)
Baccaratfrom79
Baccaratfrom79
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March 27th, 2015 at 1:13:12 PM permalink
Come'on Ace you can do it!
Bac79=Hazardous Material and Chemical person correcting other's mistakes. Non AP'er, I can't count cards, low intelligence. Sprinkles magical dust on the cards. Has a lucky monkey. Baby also has a green one. Sum it up: "It's okay just blame me, it's all my fault"! ( No one believes me--so I chose to stop posting)
aceofspades
aceofspades
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March 27th, 2015 at 1:36:30 PM permalink
Guy sat down and played 1k a hand - he would make 21 on 8 doubles - he only lost 5 hands the entire shoe

I, of course, was treated quite the opposite - losing 2300 in the shoe and, I was so annoyed that on the last hand of the shoe I was dealt an Ace, 6 v dealer Q -- I hit and got an Ace for 18 -- then, as if I was in an out of body experience--I saw myself waving off a hit and, of course, lost
Since it was the last hand I asked to see the next card and it was a 3

FML
Baccaratfrom79
Baccaratfrom79
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March 27th, 2015 at 1:43:56 PM permalink
slow down and think.... on the other note, we will be right there where you are at. My guy there is calling me back after he gets the tickets or at least the confirmation letter in his hand--he went to get it. Then he will book the reservation. Concert is July 24th, so be there a few days before and after. Waiting by the phone for the guy to call me to confirm. If you want to come along to the concert, better let me know now and I will get an extra tix.
Bac79=Hazardous Material and Chemical person correcting other's mistakes. Non AP'er, I can't count cards, low intelligence. Sprinkles magical dust on the cards. Has a lucky monkey. Baby also has a green one. Sum it up: "It's okay just blame me, it's all my fault"! ( No one believes me--so I chose to stop posting)
aceofspades
aceofspades
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March 27th, 2015 at 2:02:02 PM permalink
Got on a nice nice run and was 100 from being even on the trip on 3 occasions - of course, as usually happens, I get a double and lose then lose a few in a row after that
So, after being down 2800 I am now only down 500

Taking a break
Baccaratfrom79
Baccaratfrom79
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March 27th, 2015 at 2:08:36 PM permalink
Play to win! You can do it. It's like 4:05pm where I am at. Attorney just calls me for a trucking company he represents. Says our bill is too high and something was unjustified. Great. No problem. Stop yelling. I ask him, "How do we make this a win-win"? He goes, take off this item for $2,500.00 and this one for $480.00. I told him I would the $2,500.00 one but the other I can't. He says, "great and done". I already know his spiel, to call the client and tell them he just saved them $2,500.00 and his bill for $1,000.00 or so is now justified. Glad I marked that one up more than $2,500.00 expecting this. (not fraudulently, just no discounts and charging what I know the job brings in other markets generally with lesser results) Damn attorney's! Say I got beat, nope-not this time!!
Bac79=Hazardous Material and Chemical person correcting other's mistakes. Non AP'er, I can't count cards, low intelligence. Sprinkles magical dust on the cards. Has a lucky monkey. Baby also has a green one. Sum it up: "It's okay just blame me, it's all my fault"! ( No one believes me--so I chose to stop posting)
Romes
Romes
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March 27th, 2015 at 2:09:43 PM permalink
Quote: aceofspades

Go a nice nice run and was 100 from being even on the trip on 3 occasions - of course, as usually happens, I get a double and lose then lose a few in a row after that
So, after being down 2800 I am now only down 500

Taking a break


Oh the fun start to a trip. Being a 'mathlete' you won't find me scrambling about losing X hands in a row. I pretty much start every session with at least 5-10 losses in a row within the first 30 min of play or so...

Keep breathing and keep calm. If you get to a point where you're not paying correct basic strategy you should definitely take a break. When my partner and I experienced our first big loss he looked at me when he had an A-6 V dealer 10 as to ask me what to do... I said "If you have to ask, get off the table."

Fun thing about getting smashed at the tables, even if your EV is slightly negative in blackjack, you shouldn't be "that" negative... so in the long run it WILL balance out =).
Playing it correctly means you've already won.
aceofspades
aceofspades
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March 27th, 2015 at 2:21:58 PM permalink
Quote: Baccaratfrom79

All the luck! I know you have a host but Ralph D. my host there will buy you dinner at Grotto and consider it me buying it! LOL, power of the comp. He guaranteed me tix to Bennett and Gaga concert in July as I text you about. So we are set. AC in late July, think it will be humid?

GOOD LUCK!




Well, there is an ocean breeze
MaxPen
MaxPen
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March 27th, 2015 at 3:46:41 PM permalink
Good Luck on your trip. Looking forward to meeting you and B79 in Vegas for the Monkey Challenge.
aceofspades
aceofspades
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March 27th, 2015 at 4:38:59 PM permalink
Quote: MaxPen

Good Luck on your trip. Looking forward to meeting you and B79 in Vegas for the Monkey Challenge.



Excellent - only a few weeks away
MrV
MrV
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March 27th, 2015 at 4:46:31 PM permalink
Quote: aceofspades

Well, there is an ocean breeze



Breeze, shmeeze.

That ain't the kind of blow you need.

Dial in a hooker (or better yet, bring a date) and get your tubes cleaned out.

Then attack the tables.

Not for nothing do sex and gambling go together.
"What, me worry?"
aceofspades
aceofspades
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March 27th, 2015 at 5:12:23 PM permalink
Quote: MrV

Breeze, shmeeze.

That ain't the kind of blow you need.

Dial in a hooker (or better yet, bring a date) and get your tubes cleaned out.

Then attack the tables.

Not for nothing do sex and gambling go together.




I am celibate/abstinent so that is not going to happen
EvenBob
EvenBob
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March 27th, 2015 at 5:31:43 PM permalink
Quote: aceofspades

I am celibate/abstinent



So are hookers, they just want to get into
your room so they can rip you off.
"It's not called gambling if the math is on your side."
Baccaratfrom79
Baccaratfrom79
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March 27th, 2015 at 5:56:53 PM permalink
Quote: aceofspades

I am celibate/abstinent so that is not going to happen[/II

Introduce you to one of my wife's friends. They also claim they are celebrating, I mean celibate. See how long you will last, lol.

Bac79=Hazardous Material and Chemical person correcting other's mistakes. Non AP'er, I can't count cards, low intelligence. Sprinkles magical dust on the cards. Has a lucky monkey. Baby also has a green one. Sum it up: "It's okay just blame me, it's all my fault"! ( No one believes me--so I chose to stop posting)
GWAE
GWAE
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March 27th, 2015 at 5:59:42 PM permalink
Quote: aceofspades

I am celibate/abstinent so that is not going to happen



I have seen you write that a few times. Is this a new thing?
Expect the worst and you will never be disappointed. I AM NOT PART OF GWAE RADIO SHOW
sc15
sc15
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March 27th, 2015 at 6:12:21 PM permalink
Quote: GWAE

I have seen you write that a few times. Is this a new thing?



I dunno, if I were him I'd bang my recently divorced clients.
aceofspades
aceofspades
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March 27th, 2015 at 6:51:51 PM permalink
Quote: GWAE

I have seen you write that a few times. Is this a new thing?




Been quite some time now - over a year
aceofspades
aceofspades
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March 27th, 2015 at 6:55:10 PM permalink
Ok had dinner at Grotto's (rigatoni bolognese)

Relaxed a bit watching Shark Tank in the room then headed down to the floor

It is packed here - noticed a whole bunch of new employees all formerly from the Revel

Also watched a roulette game where 6 of the last 10 spins were all "9"

I sat down to play and hit the ground running
I played one shoe, was dealt 3 naturals...but no doubles or splits
However, they weren't necessary as I made my way to the positive side of the ledger

Trip is +1650
Baccaratfrom79
Baccaratfrom79
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March 27th, 2015 at 7:07:52 PM permalink
Quote: aceofspades


It is packed here - noticed a whole bunch of new employees all formerly from the Revel.

I heard. just spent 30min's on the phone with Ralph, one of the v.p.'s of marketing. he said they took most of the higher line players from taj and a lot of the Trop's as well. gave me the spiel about how nice their suites are there at the g.n. and the pool, cabanas and they have the fire pits, etc. he just confirmed the tix my wife wanted for the concert at the Borgata. so I confirmed with him the trip for late july there.

keep winning.

Bac79=Hazardous Material and Chemical person correcting other's mistakes. Non AP'er, I can't count cards, low intelligence. Sprinkles magical dust on the cards. Has a lucky monkey. Baby also has a green one. Sum it up: "It's okay just blame me, it's all my fault"! ( No one believes me--so I chose to stop posting)
sodawater
sodawater
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March 27th, 2015 at 7:27:36 PM permalink
Quote: Baccaratfrom79


I heard. just spent 30min's on the phone with Ralph, one of the v.p.'s of marketing. he said they took most of the higher line players from taj and a lot of the Trop's as well. gave me the spiel about how nice their suites are there at the g.n. and the pool, cabanas and they have the fire pits, etc. he just confirmed the tix my wife wanted for the concert at the Borgata. so I confirmed with him the trip for late july there.

keep winning.



Can you get me 2 below-market Paramore tickets -- May 8?
AxelWolf
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March 27th, 2015 at 8:01:25 PM permalink
Quote: MaxPen

Good Luck on your trip. Looking forward to meeting you and B79 in Vegas for the Monkey Challenge.

Sorry to derail your thread Ace, however I didn't see it nessisary to revive a new one. Since you seem to be involved in the meet up ill post here. I just wanted to say that I meet up with Max the other day( nice level headed normal gu, his wife was nice as well). He had the cash as promised and offered me the entire amount. I declined the entire amount because I didn't feel it nenecessary. He insisted but I said how about $200 and deal we with the rest when and if this all happens.

Looks like we have 800 in action with Baccaratfrom79.

I have $ 50 to win $125 on a side bet with Maxpen If for any reason this doesn't happen by May first I win. If the bet goes down as mentioned he wins.
♪♪Now you swear and kick and beg us That you're not a gamblin' man Then you find you're back in Vegas With a handle in your hand♪♪ Your black cards can make you money So you hide them when you're able In the land of casinos and money You must put them on the table♪♪ You go back Jack do it again roulette wheels turinin' 'round and 'round♪♪ You go back Jack do it again♪♪
aceofspades
aceofspades
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March 27th, 2015 at 8:07:14 PM permalink
Quote: AxelWolf

Sorry to derail your thread Ace, however I didn't see it nessisary to revive a new one. Since you seem to be involved in the meet up ill post here. I just wanted to say that I meet up with Max the other day( nice level headed normal gu, his wife was nice as well). He had the cash as promised and offered me the entire amount. I declined the entire amount because I didn't feel it nenecessary. He insisted but I said how about $200 and deal we with the rest when and if this all happens.

Looks like we have 800 in action with Baccaratfrom79.

I have $ 50 to win $125 on a side bet with Maxpen If for any reason this doesn't happen by May first I win. If the bet goes down as mentioned he wins.




No problem with a de-rail -- my TR's are like living organisms -- they wander and veer and take on a life of their own
Baccaratfrom79
Baccaratfrom79
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March 27th, 2015 at 8:18:10 PM permalink
Quote: sodawater

Can you get me 2 below-market Paramore tickets -- May 8?



My host (Julie e.) whom was at the Borgata when I used to go there went to the Tropicana. I don't have a current host there, my g.n. host (whom I knew for years at The Taj), is getting me those tickets cause we made a commitment to stay at his property.
Bac79=Hazardous Material and Chemical person correcting other's mistakes. Non AP'er, I can't count cards, low intelligence. Sprinkles magical dust on the cards. Has a lucky monkey. Baby also has a green one. Sum it up: "It's okay just blame me, it's all my fault"! ( No one believes me--so I chose to stop posting)
AxelWolf
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March 27th, 2015 at 8:47:13 PM permalink
Quote: aceofspades

No problem with a de-rail -- my TR's are like living organisms -- they wander and veer and take on a life of their own

kind of like crabs.
♪♪Now you swear and kick and beg us That you're not a gamblin' man Then you find you're back in Vegas With a handle in your hand♪♪ Your black cards can make you money So you hide them when you're able In the land of casinos and money You must put them on the table♪♪ You go back Jack do it again roulette wheels turinin' 'round and 'round♪♪ You go back Jack do it again♪♪
djatc
djatc
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March 28th, 2015 at 12:17:36 AM permalink
Quote: sc15

I dunno, if I were him I'd bang my recently divorced clients.



During the divorce and bill the soon to be ex husband for services rendered
"Man Babes" #AxelFabulous
sc15
sc15
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March 28th, 2015 at 1:05:52 AM permalink
Quote: djatc

During the divorce and bill the soon to be ex husband for services rendered



Well, typically during a divorce each party has their own attorney.. so he'd be billing the woman.
Greasyjohn
Greasyjohn
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March 28th, 2015 at 5:02:32 AM permalink
Good luck AoS.
aceofspades
aceofspades
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March 28th, 2015 at 6:49:41 AM permalink
Quote: Greasyjohn

Good luck AoS.




Thanks good morning everyone
Baccaratfrom79
Baccaratfrom79
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March 28th, 2015 at 6:55:12 AM permalink
Quote: aceofspades

Thanks good morning everyone



Shit I waited for you to get up. Make it count..... I am off to the interstate to finish 2 out of the four jobs I have open. Be on tonight, I want to see results. Call me if you want, phones open. If your host cant do something call me also, mine there owes me, he can certainly cross-comp, etc. Please for all mankind, win and stop. Period.
Bac79=Hazardous Material and Chemical person correcting other's mistakes. Non AP'er, I can't count cards, low intelligence. Sprinkles magical dust on the cards. Has a lucky monkey. Baby also has a green one. Sum it up: "It's okay just blame me, it's all my fault"! ( No one believes me--so I chose to stop posting)
aceofspades
aceofspades
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March 28th, 2015 at 8:45:07 AM permalink
Started shoe as follows:

BJ
BJ
press to 300 - split 8,8 lose
BJ
BJ
Press to 400 lose

Over the next 2 shoes I would lose 90% of doubles and presses


Ughhhhh - variance is a killer


Trip is +1700
RonC
RonC
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March 28th, 2015 at 8:52:34 AM permalink
Enjoying your trip report. Thanks for bringing us along!!
aceofspades
aceofspades
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March 28th, 2015 at 11:00:30 AM permalink
Just lost 9 hands in a row including 3 doubles -- back to even
aceofspades
aceofspades
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March 28th, 2015 at 11:14:58 AM permalink
Ok new shuffle

First 5 hands:

BJ
Pressed to 200 got a k,k v dealer 6 flips over Ace
Rode the 200 and dealt 10,3 v dealer 5 flips over 6 draws 5 draws 10
Have 200 up dealt 7,7 v dealer 7 split
First 7 dealt 4 double draw 9 for 20
Second 7 dealt 4 double draw 10 for 21
Dealer turns over an Ace for 18

Then went on a little roller coaster ride and by the end of the shoe I was back to +1700
MrV
MrV
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March 28th, 2015 at 12:29:26 PM permalink
Quote: sc15

I dunno, if I were him I'd bang my recently divorced clients.



Lawyers do it in their briefs.
"What, me worry?"
rdw4potus
rdw4potus
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March 28th, 2015 at 12:58:12 PM permalink
Quote: MrV

Lawyers do it in their briefs.



Is that a confession, counselor?
"So as the clock ticked and the day passed, opportunity met preparation, and luck happened." - Maurice Clarett
MrV
MrV
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March 28th, 2015 at 12:59:23 PM permalink
She offered her honor, he honored her offer, and he was on her and off her all night.
"What, me worry?"
EvenBob
EvenBob
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March 28th, 2015 at 12:59:28 PM permalink
Back and forth, back and forth for Ace. I have
a bad feeling it's going to get worse before it gets
better.
"It's not called gambling if the math is on your side."
1BB
1BB
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March 28th, 2015 at 1:08:55 PM permalink
Quote: aceofspades

I am celibate/abstinent so that is not going to happen



I hope I'm not out of line but I have to ask since you've mentioned it at least four times. Is there a story brewing here? I hope I'm reading this right in thinking that you want to be asked about this. Is this something you'd like to share? Did you have a scare or a near miss?

Ace, you are one of our most interesting posters. You could write about paint drying and make it fun. What say you on this subject?
Many people, especially ignorant people, want to punish you for speaking the truth. - Mahatma Ghandi
Kerkebet
Kerkebet
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March 28th, 2015 at 1:12:32 PM permalink
Quote: rdw4potus

Is that a confession, counselor?


ACCOUNTANTS are good with figures.

ACTORS do it on cue.

ADVERTISERS use the "new, improved" method.

AMBULANCE DRIVERS come quicker.

ANSI does it in the standard way

ARCHEOLOGISTS like it old.

ARCHITECTS have great plans.

ARTISTS are exhibitionists.

ASSEMBLY LINE WORKERS do it over and over.

ASTRONOMERS do it with Uranus.

ATTORNEYS make better motions.

AUDITORS like to examine figures.

BABYSITTERS charge by the hour.

BAILIFFS always come to order.

BAKERS knead it daily.

BAND MEMBERS play all night.

BANKERS do it with interest - penalty for early withdrawal.

BARBERS do it with shear pleasure.

BARTENDERS do it on the rocks.

BASEBALL PLAYERS make it to first base.

BASKETBALL PLAYERS score more often.

BEEKEEPERS like to eat their honey.

BEER BREWERS do it with more hops.

BEER DRINKERS get more head.

BICYCLISTS do it with 10 speeds.

BOOKKEEPERS do it with double entry.

BOSSES delegate the task to others.

BOWLERS have bigger balls.

BRICKLAYERS lay all day.

BRIDGE PLAYERS try to get a rubber.

BUS DRIVERS come early and pull out on time.

BUTCHERS have better meat.

C'Bers do it on the air.

CAMPERS do it in a tent.

CARPENTERS hammer it harder.

CARPET LAYERS do it on the floor.

CHEERLEADERS do it with more enthusiasm.

CHEMISTS like to experiment.

CHESS PLAYERS check their mates.

CHIROPRACTORS do it by manipulation.

CLOCK MAKERS do it mechanically.

CLOWNS do it for laughs.

COACHES whistle while they work.

COBOL PROGRAMMERS do it with bugs.

COCKTAIL WAITRESSES serve highballs.

COMPUTER GAME PLAYERS just can't stop.

COMPUTER OPERATORS get the most out of their software.

CONSTRUCTION WORKERS lay a better foundation.

CONSULTANTS tell other how to do it.

COPS have bigger guns.

COWBOYS handle anything horny.

COWGIRLS like to ride bareback.

CRANE OPERATORS have swinging balls.

CREDIT MANAGERS always collect.

DANCERS do it in leaps and bounds.

DEADHEADS do it with Jerry.

DEER HUNTERS will do anything for a buck.

DENTAL HYGIENISTS do it till it hurts.

DENTISTS do it in your mouth.

DETECTIVES do it under cover.

DIETICIANS eat better.

DIRECT MAILERS get it in the sack.

DIVERS do it deeper.

DOCTORS do it with patience.

DRUGGISTS fill your prescription.

DRUMMERS do it in 4/4 time.

DRY WALLER'S are better bangers.

ELECTRICIANS check your shorts.

ENGINEERS charge by the hour.

EXECUTIVES have large staffs.

FARMERS spread it around.

FIREMEN are always in heat.

FISHERMEN are proud of their rods.

FOOTBALL PLAYERS are measured by the yard.

FOUR-WHEELERS eat more bush.

FURRIERS appreciate good beaver.

GARBAGE MEN come once a week.

GARDENERS have 50 foot hoses.

GAS STATION ATTENDANTS pump all day.

GEOLOGISTS are great explorers.

GOLFERS do it in 18 holes.

GYMNASTS mount and dismount well.

HACKERS do it with fewer instructions.

HAIRDRESSERS give the best blow jobs.

HAM OPERATORS do it with frequency.

HANDYMEN like good screws.

HEWLETT PACKARD does it with precision.

HORSEBACK RIDERS stay in the saddle longer.

HUNTERS do it with a bang.

INSURANCE SALESMEN are premium lovers.

INTERIOR DECORATORS do it all over the house.

INVENTORS find a way.

JANITORS clean up afterwards.

JEWELERS mount real gems.

JOGGERS do it on the run.

LANDSCAPERS plant it deeper.

LAWYERS do it in their briefs.

LIBRARIANS do it quietly.

LOCKSMITHS can get into anything.

LONG DISTANCE RUNNERS last longer.

MACHINISTS make the best screws.

MAGICIANS are quicker than the eye.

MAINTENANCE MEN sweep 'em off their feet.

MANAGERS supervise others.

MARKETING REPs do it on commission.

MILKMEN deliver twice a week.

MILLIONAIRES pay to have it done.

MINERS sink deeper shafts.

MINISTERS do it on Sundays.

MISSILE MEN have better thrust.

MODELS do it in any position.

MODEM MANUFACTURERS do it with all sorts of characters.

MOTORCYCLISTS like something hot between their legs.

MOVIE STARS do it on film.

MUSICIANS do it with rhythm.

NONSMOKERS do it without huffing and puffing.

NURSES call the shots.

OCEANOGRAPHERS do it down under.

OPERATORS do it person-to-person.

OPTOMETRISTS do it face-to-face.

PAINTERS do it with longer strokes.

PARAMEDICS PHOTOGRAPHERS do it with a flash.

PHYSICISTS do it with uniform harmonic motion.

PILOTS keep it up longer.

PLUMBERS do it under the sink.

POLICEMEN like big busts.

POLITICIANS do it for 4 years then have to get re-erected.

POSTMEN come slower.

PRINTERS do it without wrinkling the sheets.

PRINTERS reproduce the fastest.

PROCTOLOGISTS do it in the end.

PROFESSORS do it by the book.

RACERS like to come in first.

RACQUETBALL PLAYERS do it off the wall..

RADIO and TV ANNOUNCERS broadcast it.

REAL ESTATE PEOPLE know all the prime spots.

RECYCLERS use it again.

REPAIRMEN can fix anything.

REPORTERS do it daily.

RESEARCHERS are still looking for it.

RETAILERS move their merchandise.

ROOFERS do it on top.

RUNNERS get into more pants.

SAILORS like to be blown.

SALESPEOPLE have away with their tongues.

SCIENTISTS discovered it.

SECRETARIES do it from 9 to 5.

SKYDIVERS are good till the last drop.

SOCCER PLAYERS have leather balls.

SPEECH PATHOLOGISTS are oral specialists.

SPELUNKERS do it underground.

SPORTSCASTERS like an instant replay.

STEWARDESSES do it in the air.

STUDENTS use their heads.

SURGEONS are smooth operators.

TAILORS make it fit.

TAXI DRIVERS do it all over town.

TAXIDERMISTS mount anything.

TELEPHONE CO. EMPLOYEES let their fingers do the walking.

TELLERS can handle all deposits and withdrawals.

TENNIS PLAYERS have fuzzy balls.

TRUCK DRIVERS have bigger dipsticks.

TRUCKERS carry bigger loads.

TYPISTS do it in triplicate.

VETERINARIANS are pussy lovers.

VOLLEYBALL PLAYERS keep it up.

WAITRESSES serve it piping hot.

WATER SKIERS come down harder.

WELDERS have hotter rods.

WRESTLERS know the best holds.

WRITERS have novel ways.

ZOOLOGISTS do it with animal instinct.

Quote: EvenBob

Back and forth, back and forth for Ace.

Nonsense is a very hard thing to keep up. Just ask the Wizard and company.
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