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glenwiggy
glenwiggy
Joined: Mar 26, 2012
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Thanks for this post from:
onenickelmiracle
March 26th, 2012 at 10:48:01 AM permalink
While counting cards for over ten years, I've had the privilege of sitting besides many other counters. They're always serious and methodical. Do any of them have a sense of humor? Do you? Let me know if you think the following short story is funny:

~ The Genius ~

During a drive from Omaha to Oklahoma City to visit my parents, I stopped at a roadside casino in some no-name Kansas town. I wanted to play a few hands to break the monotony of driving. I sat at a blackjack table which had no posted rules. Since the dealer was in the middle of a chip exchange with the pit boss and security staff, I asked the only player at the table a couple questions. The man was diminutive, probably weighing less than 100 pounds, and wore thick, black-framed glasses.

"What are the double-down rules? Do they offer surrender?"

Without looking in my direction, the wee man said, "Some dogs are named Talmadge."

"Pardon," I responded.

He repeated with a ton of attitude, "SOME DOGS ARE NAMED TALMADGE!"

I stood up and slowly walked from the table saying, "Oooookay then." The guy might've been mentally challenged. Some dogs are named Talmadge? Or maybe he was simply intoxicated or under the influence of something stronger than alcohol. Either way, I determined he should remain in solitude. I found another table where I played head's up with the dealer. A half hour later, a loud, obnoxious woman approached the game. She started blabbering even before taking a seat, and did not stop talking when the cards were dealt.

"We've been on the road all day in that blasted sun—Cousin Mary is driving me crazy in the RV—If we don't get to Yellowstone soon, I'm gonna bust—Where is the potty in this place?"

She wouldn't stop yammering. Eventually, she turned my way.

"Hi, my name's Shelly, I'm from Rolla, Missouri—What's your name?"

I looked straight ahead, thought a moment, and responded, "Some dogs are named Talmadge."

"Dogs are whaaaaat?" Shelly responded with a puzzled look on her face.

I screamed, "SOME DOGS ARE NAMED TALMADGE!"

The woman quit talking for the first time, and gently pulled herself away the table, all the while giving me a strange look. The dealer, pit boss and security staff gave me puzzled looks as well, but continued their business. At that moment, I realized that the little guy with the thick, black-framed glasses was a genius.
bobbarker14
bobbarker14
Joined: Mar 18, 2012
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March 26th, 2012 at 12:09:06 PM permalink
So what was the count at that point?
Boney526
Boney526
Joined: Sep 25, 2011
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March 26th, 2012 at 6:17:29 PM permalink
Haha.

Genius.
seviay
seviay
Joined: May 19, 2010
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March 30th, 2012 at 9:43:56 AM permalink
I'm no card counter, but that's fantastic!
i0r0retardod
i0r0retardod
Joined: Mar 29, 2012
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March 30th, 2012 at 7:45:57 PM permalink
Priceless man. Priceless. I would have to say if I do not have a sense of humor at the Blackjack tables. Same for roulette. However who cant have fun at the craps table. And hold'em forget about it.
HorseJeff
HorseJeff
Joined: Feb 21, 2012
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April 4th, 2012 at 2:25:05 PM permalink
Great yarn. But on a more serious note, a sense of humor is a good attribute for a card counter. it helps in the game of camouflage if you feel you will be getting heat. A stern or serious look all the time is one the markers pit personnel look for in counters, especially at a table where everyone else seems to be having a good time. Sunglasses and ball caps fall in that category too. I don't known if thrive ever broken it down along ethnic lines, but I suspect whites and Asians top the suspicion list.
The only thing more pathetic than watching a gambler who's afraid to lose is watching a gambler who is afraid to win. And I've seen plenty of both.
Ibeatyouraces
Ibeatyouraces
Joined: Jan 12, 2010
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April 4th, 2012 at 2:41:18 PM permalink
deleted
DUHHIIIIIIIII HEARD THAT!
HorseJeff
HorseJeff
Joined: Feb 21, 2012
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April 4th, 2012 at 8:50:53 PM permalink
I think the ball cap thing is strange too but I just threw it in there because I read it from someone who's opinion I respect (it may have been Kevin Blackwood). What struck me as odd about it is that LV is in the middle of the desert and temps regularly top 100° in the summer. You damn right I'm going to be wearing a cap of some sort!
The only thing more pathetic than watching a gambler who's afraid to lose is watching a gambler who is afraid to win. And I've seen plenty of both.
PopCan
PopCan
Joined: Feb 15, 2012
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April 4th, 2012 at 9:25:23 PM permalink
Ball caps are worn so that the cameras can't get a good picture of you for Biometrica or the surveillance networks. It works. So yes, it's a bit of a red flag.

EDIT: That last sentence may have seemed like a sarcastic understatement; it wasn't. It's just a bit of a red flag. It doesn't scream "COUNTER!" like being a stern-faced, nervous, middle-aged white guy with glasses who stares at the cards and discard rack.
HotBlonde
HotBlonde
Joined: Feb 8, 2011
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April 4th, 2012 at 9:47:22 PM permalink
I've been trying hard but I just don't get it. Maybe cuz I'm not a card counter. :(
OFFICIALLY and justifiably reclaimed my title as SuperHotBlonde!

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