is my boyfriend cheating?
November 17th, 2010 at 10:18:53 AM
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I recently received a telephone call saying that they saw my boyfriend
was with another girl. He huuged her and kissed her. The person that saw my boyfriend recognized him 100%. My boyfriend and I have been together for ten years.
Wehave been living together for nine years.
My boyfriend is a driver/sales delivery guy for energy drinks. The person says it was him 100%. They did send me pictures of the van
that he was on next to the the truck that he was in with.
However, I asked my boyfriend and he said it was not him and that he was delivering products. In fact, he was just listening to what I was saying of what I found out. . He said that
he was working. I don't know what to believe I don't know if to believe that person or my boyfriend. I don't know what to do. I am
confused. I love him a lot and have been having trouble trusting him.
I have gut feelings that he is cheating on me and I have had dreams as
well that he is cheating on me. I need to some advise in what to do
regarding this situation.
Today, I was driving down the same path that he was spotted cheating on me. I saw him driving the same van, same time they spotted him and same direction he was driving too. However, I did not see the truck. I keep asking for the truth and he denies the fact that it was not him. I don't know who to believe and what to do? please advise. thank you.
was with another girl. He huuged her and kissed her. The person that saw my boyfriend recognized him 100%. My boyfriend and I have been together for ten years.
Wehave been living together for nine years.
My boyfriend is a driver/sales delivery guy for energy drinks. The person says it was him 100%. They did send me pictures of the van
that he was on next to the the truck that he was in with.
However, I asked my boyfriend and he said it was not him and that he was delivering products. In fact, he was just listening to what I was saying of what I found out. . He said that
he was working. I don't know what to believe I don't know if to believe that person or my boyfriend. I don't know what to do. I am
confused. I love him a lot and have been having trouble trusting him.
I have gut feelings that he is cheating on me and I have had dreams as
well that he is cheating on me. I need to some advise in what to do
regarding this situation.
Today, I was driving down the same path that he was spotted cheating on me. I saw him driving the same van, same time they spotted him and same direction he was driving too. However, I did not see the truck. I keep asking for the truth and he denies the fact that it was not him. I don't know who to believe and what to do? please advise. thank you.
November 17th, 2010 at 11:02:42 AM
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Oh boy. This one can't be fun to answer ...
Short answer: yup, he's cheating. Maybe not that single, particular instance, but yeah, he's cheating.
Longer answer: you say, "I love him a lot and have been having trouble trusting him," which I think is pretty revealing. IMHO, a lot of things can *feel* like love, and maybe you do have real love for him. But whatever real love actually *IS*, it includes trust. If you don't have that, I would suggest re-examinig your (very real) feelings, because, as real as they may be, it may not be "love," but something that feels a lot like it but isn't.
PS: it's a little weird that you stalked him. I understand that seeing something you've invested ten years in slipping away is difficult in the extreme, but stalking is weird, and to be honest, it makes me think that, whatever you do feel for him (or around him), it's not real love ... whatever "real love" is, it's not stalking the object.
PPS: yeah, I'm a random guy on an internet forum, and there's much more I don't know. But hey, you posted it!
Best of luck, sounds like you're in for a hard time. I would suggest breaking up. Yes, it's hard, but it will only get harder once you find out all these things for-sure.
My $0.02.
Short answer: yup, he's cheating. Maybe not that single, particular instance, but yeah, he's cheating.
Longer answer: you say, "I love him a lot and have been having trouble trusting him," which I think is pretty revealing. IMHO, a lot of things can *feel* like love, and maybe you do have real love for him. But whatever real love actually *IS*, it includes trust. If you don't have that, I would suggest re-examinig your (very real) feelings, because, as real as they may be, it may not be "love," but something that feels a lot like it but isn't.
PS: it's a little weird that you stalked him. I understand that seeing something you've invested ten years in slipping away is difficult in the extreme, but stalking is weird, and to be honest, it makes me think that, whatever you do feel for him (or around him), it's not real love ... whatever "real love" is, it's not stalking the object.
PPS: yeah, I'm a random guy on an internet forum, and there's much more I don't know. But hey, you posted it!
Best of luck, sounds like you're in for a hard time. I would suggest breaking up. Yes, it's hard, but it will only get harder once you find out all these things for-sure.
My $0.02.
November 17th, 2010 at 11:07:48 AM
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Yeah, he's cheating.
And he's a bad liar.
If he was a good liar, he would have admitted that it was him, but explained the girl as being an old schoolmate or something.
By denying it entirely, you know he's full of it.
And he's a bad liar.
If he was a good liar, he would have admitted that it was him, but explained the girl as being an old schoolmate or something.
By denying it entirely, you know he's full of it.
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November 17th, 2010 at 12:07:41 PM
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Paging MKL....Paging MKL!! We need some EXPERT cheating opinion here.
November 17th, 2010 at 12:15:34 PM
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Quote: JerryLoganPaging MKL....Paging MKL!! We need some EXPERT cheating opinion here.
Danger! Danger, Jerry Logan, Danger!
"So as the clock ticked and the day passed, opportunity met preparation, and luck happened." - Maurice Clarett
November 17th, 2010 at 12:20:16 PM
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He's probably cheating, but you need more evidence. Look at his cell phone records, put a nanny on the computer, and keep a close eye on him.
You've been with him for 10 years, and that's a long time. A call from a friend doesn't qualify here as a cheat. Kissing and hugging is inappropriate behavior but the person he was with could have been anyone. Yet, if a friend says it was him, and he denies it, he might be lying to you. But you don't know. Consider the Seinfeld episode where George said that Jerry's girlfriend was with his cousin Geoffrey (alas George was not wearing his glasses, and the woman in question was kissing a horse). You don't want to be wrong on this.
You've been with him for 10 years, and that's a long time. A call from a friend doesn't qualify here as a cheat. Kissing and hugging is inappropriate behavior but the person he was with could have been anyone. Yet, if a friend says it was him, and he denies it, he might be lying to you. But you don't know. Consider the Seinfeld episode where George said that Jerry's girlfriend was with his cousin Geoffrey (alas George was not wearing his glasses, and the woman in question was kissing a horse). You don't want to be wrong on this.
-----
You want the truth! You can't handle the truth!
November 17th, 2010 at 12:32:25 PM
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They sent you a picture put its not showing him?
If they had a camera they could have taken a photo of what really happened.
I think its someone being malicious. After all, if they had a camera they should have sufficient proof.
If he is cheating? So what? Does he bring his paycheck home to you? Does he perform adequately at home?
What more do you care about?
If they had a camera they could have taken a photo of what really happened.
I think its someone being malicious. After all, if they had a camera they should have sufficient proof.
If he is cheating? So what? Does he bring his paycheck home to you? Does he perform adequately at home?
What more do you care about?
November 17th, 2010 at 12:43:47 PM
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Quote: JerryLoganPaging MKL....Paging MKL!! We need some EXPERT cheating opinion here.
No, no, we'd rather hear from you, Jerry---after all, a person who has actually had his wife cheat on him would have a better perspective.
The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one. The happiness of credulity is a cheap and dangerous quality.---George Bernard Shaw
November 17th, 2010 at 12:59:08 PM
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Quote: mkl654321No, no, we'd rather hear from you, Jerry---after all, a person who has actually had his wife cheat on him would have a better perspective.
So let's see....a person who has experienced spousal cheating has a "better perspective" on the issue of cheating, but a loner who's going to die a lonely old man and has never impressed any woman enough to think about marriage is capable of that "better perspective" when it comes to being married.
Hmmm....when I grow up I'd like to be an expert too!
November 17th, 2010 at 3:40:50 PM
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You two might as well be the old married couple...
November 17th, 2010 at 4:33:50 PM
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Quote: RonDiazYou two might as well be the old married couple...
Then he'd have to be the man because he's older than me. YIKES!
November 18th, 2010 at 11:05:50 AM
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Quote: mkl654321...a person who has actually had his wife cheat on him would have a better perspective.
Quote: JerryLogan... but a loner who's going to die a lonely old man and has never impressed any woman enough to think about marriage is capable of that "better perspective" when it comes to being married.
Jeez, I take off for a couple days for the gaming show and this is what happens. Both of these violate the no personal insults rule. However, I have throw the flag much further in MKL's case. The comment on JL's wife was below the belt. Those are truly fighting words, and I think call for an unconditional apology. I already warned JL about an insult in another thread, so MKL, consider this yours.
"For with much wisdom comes much sorrow." -- Ecclesiastes 1:18 (NIV)
November 21st, 2010 at 10:42:01 AM
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Quote: boymimboHe's probably cheating, but you need more evidence. Look at his cell phone records, put a nanny on the computer, and keep a close eye on him.
You've been with him for 10 years, and that's a long time. A call from a friend doesn't qualify here as a cheat. Kissing and hugging is inappropriate behavior but the person he was with could have been anyone. Yet, if a friend says it was him, and he denies it, he might be lying to you. But you don't know. Consider the Seinfeld episode where George said that Jerry's girlfriend was with his cousin Geoffrey (alas George was not wearing his glasses, and the woman in question was kissing a horse). You don't want to be wrong on this.
