Poll

1 vote (9.09%)
1 vote (9.09%)
7 votes (63.63%)
No votes (0%)
No votes (0%)
1 vote (9.09%)
1 vote (9.09%)

11 members have voted

AZDuffman
AZDuffman
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May 20th, 2011 at 4:25:47 PM permalink
Vote on one, then add one!
All animals are equal, but some are more equal than others
MathExtremist
MathExtremist
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May 20th, 2011 at 4:39:12 PM permalink
... film at 11, then stay tuned for 30 Rock's Tracy Morgan tonight on The Late Show with David Letterman.
"In my own case, when it seemed to me after a long illness that death was close at hand, I found no little solace in playing constantly at dice." -- Girolamo Cardano, 1563
Wizard
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Wizard
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May 20th, 2011 at 5:49:26 PM permalink
Michael Stipe, lead singer of R.E.M., says "and I feel fine."
"For with much wisdom comes much sorrow." -- Ecclesiastes 1:18 (NIV)
rxwine
rxwine
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May 20th, 2011 at 5:55:01 PM permalink
World to end tomorrow.

Weather:

AM -Temp 68-72, Sunny with light wind 5 to10mph
Afternoon - Temp 75-80, Partly cloudy, with 30% chance of showers.
Evening - Temp -50 to 130+F, Wind 100-300mph gusting up to 750mph, Thunderstorms, Snow, Beachball size hail, and Brimstone.
There's no secret. Just know what you're talking about before you open your mouth.
Face
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Face
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May 20th, 2011 at 6:00:43 PM permalink
...OJ to pen memoir on 'How he would have done it'.
The opinions of this moderator are for entertainment purposes only.
pacomartin
pacomartin
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May 20th, 2011 at 6:07:44 PM permalink


Harold is now 89 years old. What are the odds given in Vegas that he is correct?

Look at that kind old man's face. Would he lie to you?

The rolling earthquakes so that each time zone is destroyed at exactly 6 PM is a bit much, however. I assume it will start at the meridian where the day changes precisely.
rxwine
rxwine
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May 20th, 2011 at 6:09:43 PM permalink
Keep predicting the world will end, and sooner or later you might be right.
There's no secret. Just know what you're talking about before you open your mouth.
AZDuffman
AZDuffman
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May 20th, 2011 at 6:38:49 PM permalink
Quote: rxwine

Keep predicting the world will end, and sooner or later you might be right.



BTW: what is the real difference if it is sooner or later? lol
All animals are equal, but some are more equal than others
Wizard
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Wizard
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May 20th, 2011 at 6:40:17 PM permalink
Quote: rxwine

Beachball size hail, and Brimstone.



I love it!

What in the hell (forgive the pun) is brimstone anyway? And you forgot fire. Brimstone is always accompanied by fire.
"For with much wisdom comes much sorrow." -- Ecclesiastes 1:18 (NIV)
punkinhead
punkinhead
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May 20th, 2011 at 6:41:24 PM permalink
PARTY LIKE A ROCKSTAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DJTeddyBear
DJTeddyBear
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May 20th, 2011 at 7:54:43 PM permalink
... prepare to kiss your ass goodbye.



Quote: pacomartin

The rolling earthquakes so that each time zone is destroyed at exactly 6 PM is a bit much, however. I assume it will start at the meridian where the day changes precisely.

Rolling earthquakes? Cool. I hadn't heard that part.
I invented a few casino games. Info: http://www.DaveMillerGaming.com/ 覧覧覧覧覧覧覧覧覧覧覧覧覧覧覧覧覧覧 Superstitions are silly, childish, irrational rituals, born out of fear of the unknown. But how much does it cost to knock on wood? 😁
EvenBob
EvenBob
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May 20th, 2011 at 9:16:52 PM permalink
Quote: Wizard

I love it!

What in the hell (forgive the pun) is brimstone anyway? And you forgot fire. Brimstone is always accompanied by fire.



Brimstone means sulfur in Biblical terms. Burning sulfur will kill you, it produces sulfur dioxide, and it really really stinks.
"It's not called gambling if the math is on your side."
Toes14
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May 20th, 2011 at 11:50:38 PM permalink
Quote: pacomartin

The rolling earthquakes so that each time zone is destroyed at exactly 6 PM is a bit much, however. I assume it will start at the meridian where the day changes precisely.



At least I'll get to watch the Preakness!
"Bite my Glorious Golden Ass!" - Bender Bending Rodriguez
Wavy70
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May 21st, 2011 at 12:08:09 AM permalink
Jesus better be ready to show his birth certificate.
I have a bewitched egg that I use to play VP with and I have net over 900k with it.
AZDuffman
AZDuffman
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May 21st, 2011 at 4:32:25 AM permalink
Quote: Wavy70

Jesus better be ready to show his birth certificate.



The difference is neither Jesus nor his followers think he is Barack Obama.
All animals are equal, but some are more equal than others
Croupier
Croupier
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May 21st, 2011 at 5:46:03 AM permalink
Missed an option on the poll. Where's the Im JerryLogan button?
[This space is intentionally left blank]
timberjim
timberjim
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May 21st, 2011 at 6:14:14 AM permalink
Has anybody heard from Aussie lately? Is the other side of the world still there?
Morphius
Morphius
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May 21st, 2011 at 8:05:06 AM permalink
all over the internet people are making Rapture jokes like there's no tomorrow.
Wizard
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Wizard
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May 21st, 2011 at 8:55:20 AM permalink
Quote: Morphius

all over the internet people are making Rapture jokes like there's no tomorrow.



Between this and Arnold Schwarzenegger's love child, it must have been an easy week for joke writers to come up with material.
"For with much wisdom comes much sorrow." -- Ecclesiastes 1:18 (NIV)
Morphius
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May 21st, 2011 at 9:07:49 AM permalink
Definately... one of my favourites by an Aussie (British absed though) comedian called Tim Minchin....

Quote:

Did you know: 75 million years ago today, God whisked all the good little dinosaurs away to heaven. #velocirapture

Wizard
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May 21st, 2011 at 9:11:54 AM permalink
One of my favorites, and I'm paraphrasing:

Quote: Bill Mahar

Between the Dominique Strauss-Kahn and Arnold Schwarzenegger stories, this was a tough week for maids. In fact, when I ran into my own maid in the kitchen this morning she looked very nervous and said, "Okay, I'll do the windows."

"For with much wisdom comes much sorrow." -- Ecclesiastes 1:18 (NIV)
Wavy70
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May 21st, 2011 at 9:35:47 AM permalink
Quote: AZDuffman

The difference is neither Jesus nor his followers think he is Barack Obama.



Don't tell the teaparty Jesus is a foreigner.
I have a bewitched egg that I use to play VP with and I have net over 900k with it.
Wavy70
Wavy70
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May 21st, 2011 at 9:36:39 AM permalink
Quote: Wizard

Between this and Arnold Schwarzenegger's love child, it must have been an easy week for joke writers to come up with material.



It was far easier to joke about Arnolds lover than to actually view her.
I have a bewitched egg that I use to play VP with and I have net over 900k with it.
dm
dm
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May 21st, 2011 at 10:32:19 AM permalink
So on Monday we can take great pride in our politicians.
EvenBob
EvenBob
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May 21st, 2011 at 4:01:21 PM permalink
Quote: Wavy70

It was far easier to joke about Arnolds lover than to actually view her.



Arnold is an egotistical asshole. He cannot keep it in his pants. When he first started making movies in the 70's, he was warned countless times to quit hitting on every woman on the set. People who know him say he's all ego, he knows everything and is always right. He would have made a good Nazi, Hitler was from Austria too.
"It's not called gambling if the math is on your side."
zippyboy
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May 21st, 2011 at 4:40:02 PM permalink
Quote: EvenBob

Arnold is an egotistical asshole. He cannot keep it in his pants. When he first started making movies in the 70's, he was warned countless times to quit hitting on every woman on the set. People who know him say he's all ego, he knows everything and is always right.


Plus, he smokes a cigar indoors. Only assholes do that. And I bet we see more women coming forward about other children in the weeks to come, just like we saw with Tiger Woods.
"Poker sure is an easy game to beat if you have the roll to keep rebuying."
cclub79
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May 21st, 2011 at 7:26:14 PM permalink
Does anyone remember the joke about the newspapers? I have heard it a few places with various papers being swapped, notably by Rush Limbaugh...

They find out the world will end tomorrow, and they all lay out their headlines:

WaPo: "World To End Tomorrow...Details on Page B5."
WSJ : "World To End Tomorrow...Markets close early."
USAToday: "IT'S OVER!"
NY Times: "World To End Tomorrow...Women and Minorities Hardest Hit."
EvenBob
EvenBob
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May 21st, 2011 at 7:39:39 PM permalink
Quote: cclub79


NY Times: "World To End Tomorrow...Women and Minorities Hardest Hit."



Thats on old old joke on Rush's show. The Liberal media often uses 'Women and Minorities Hardest Hit' when lambasting some program on the Right they don't like. So Rush uses it now for everything, and its often hilarious.
"It's not called gambling if the math is on your side."
cclub79
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May 21st, 2011 at 7:45:21 PM permalink
Quote: EvenBob

Thats on old old joke on Rush's show. The Liberal media often uses 'Women and Minorities Hardest Hit' when lambasting some program on the Right they don't like. So Rush uses it now for everything, and its often hilarious.



What's funny is Rush usually has the Post be the punchline, but I think it makes a lot more sense for the Times. The Post is not as blatantly partisan in EVERY editorial decision.
rxwine
rxwine
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May 21st, 2011 at 10:11:25 PM permalink
Maybe he forgot to calculate in a leap year and it's tomorrow?

Iceland's most active volcano is erupting

That's an awesome photo.
There's no secret. Just know what you're talking about before you open your mouth.
Doc
Doc
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May 22nd, 2011 at 12:49:32 PM permalink
Quote: Wizard

... it must have been an easy week for joke writers to come up with material.


My son was married yesterday afternoon -- it's been a great weekend all around. As part of the Episcopal rector's admonition to the couple in expressing their vows, he said, "Make this a somber vow, as if it is the end of the world." He then gently mocked the doomsayers, describing them politely as, "Christians, from California of course ...."
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