Vs. Opponents With Diminished Capacity

I've been at tables with players who were blind, high, inebriated, old, retarded, and even schizophrenic. What is your take on playing poker against players with diminished capacity?

I will not say who, but I know someone here who lost his ass to a retard. I'm not joking. Feel free to comment Mr. someone.

Quote: Ayecarumba

What is your take on playing poker against players with diminished capacity?

About $23.50 per hour. When I can find a gaggle of them splashing around together near the bottom of the lowest canyons of basic human competence.

I am in favor of lunatics, drunkards, and garden variety drooling imbeciles bearing chips. I pretty much specialize in playing only at tables well stocked with the mentally lame and emotionally crippled, seeking to relieve them of their burden before they squander it on something or someone even more foolish.

It's a crime to let a sucker keep his money

Edit: If you have an edge exploit it as much as possible, you didn't force the booze down their throat

If they are mentally handicapped I would do my best not to take their $$

Ayecumrumba, why do you assume that old age automatically means a person has diminished capacity.

Quote: Ayecarumba

I've been at tables with players who were blind, high, inebriated, old, retarded, and even schizophrenic. What is your take on playing poker against players with diminished capacity?

I have also been at people trying to portray people who are all of the above. The trick is being able to recognize the legitimacy.

They are in a casino. If they don't lose it to you, they will lose it to the casino.

Also, I'm not sure what blind has to do with poker skill. I am assuming that they can have someone whisper their cards to them. If not, well, how the hell are they playing poker! If someone chooses to play poker without looking at this hole cards, then you should definitely take their money as fast as you possibly can.

Quote: Jeepster

Ayecumrumba, why do you assume that old age automatically means a person has diminished capacity.

It is not an automatic thing, but I have played with aged players who could barely hold their cards due to tremors, or would consistently misread the board or forget their hole cards. There was even an old guy in a wheelchair whose wife would have to handle the cards and chips for him. It was difficult to not overhear her comments to him, and it was easy to read her reaction to his hole cards. Maybe I should have said "ancient" instead.

RE: "old"

I think some of my capacities are diminished from what they may have been when I was 22 years old (I am not exactly 22 + a few weeks). Fortunately so far, most of them that are noticeably diminished were the kind that were mostly useful for almost managing to get myself jailed, killed, committed to rehab, or otherwise totally screwed in a not fun way on occasion when I was young and immortal. But I have no quarrel with making fun of guys with a gray hair or two; for those who don't croak themselves very early it eventually tends to become its own punishment, and as a practical matter doesn't hurt me a bit if a poker table becomes a youthful testosterone contest at which some treat their chips as a symbol of virile studly-ness they seek to display in front of their girlfriend or somesuch.

One thing I have noticed is that most of the old doddering fools whose lives I know something about did not come to be idiots late in life; their life histories usually indicate they started working on achieving that condition straight outta the womb, and seem to have been practicing idiocy daily until they got really good at it. If they choose to buy chips and bring them to a poker table, I have no problem with doing my part in seeing the game's natural Darwinian economic fundamentals taking their course, and my only concern about that is keeping them happy and comfortable enough to rebuy. I congratulate them on any success, and commiserate about how unlucky they were when they "almost got me that time."

And, "soft-play" is rightly considered unethical at a poker table. You're supposed to bust your grandma there if you can. So if you don't wanna bust or be busted, don't be there.

Free money.

Correct

Last year I was playing in a decent tournament downtown and one of the players was a young girl
with a guitar looking drink holder and she kept acting like she was getting drunker as she kept
sipping..

Well she had most everyone off their guard as we got further into the tournament, but if you
watched her closely she made every right decision and was not drunk at all.

She knocked out a number of players that did not take her seriously.

Dicesetter

Quote: dicesitter

Correct

Last year I was playing in a decent tournament downtown and one of the players was a young girl
with a guitar looking drink holder and she kept acting like she was getting drunker as she kept
sipping..

Well she had most everyone off their guard as we got further into the tournament, but if you
watched her closely she made every right decision and was not drunk at all.

She knocked out a number of players that did not take her seriously.

Dicesetter

Ill Never understand this. Oftentimes you need to be logical and let the cards and betting speak for itself.

It's all a ruse. Drunkest, craziest, loudest, players are all playing with your head. Stick to the plan.