Left with the preacher's underwear
May 12th, 2015 at 7:35:21 PM
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I just had to share this situation with the forum. My oldest daughter got married 3 days ago - a beautiful wedding in a Catholic church (the other family is Catholic) and a really fun reception.
One hour before the wedding started, I got out of my car at the church parking lot and the rented tuxedo pants I was wearing split wide open -from midway up the butt to midway down my thigh. My white jockey shorts and bare leg were clearly visible to anyone who glanced that way. I had a moment of exquisite horror as I doubted that I would be able to walk my daughter down the aisle.
I consulted with the priest who was presiding over the wedding and he led me into the rectory and provided me with a pair of his own black boxer shorts to wear under my torn pants - to minimize the visibility of the "wardrobe malfunction". With 30 minutes to go, one of the guests located a needle and thread, and my wife did a rough sewing job and closed up the tear in my pants.
So, I have a rather unusual claim: I walked my beautiful daughter down the aisle at her wedding, and left with the preacher's underwear.
Life is endlessly funny and perverse!
One hour before the wedding started, I got out of my car at the church parking lot and the rented tuxedo pants I was wearing split wide open -from midway up the butt to midway down my thigh. My white jockey shorts and bare leg were clearly visible to anyone who glanced that way. I had a moment of exquisite horror as I doubted that I would be able to walk my daughter down the aisle.
I consulted with the priest who was presiding over the wedding and he led me into the rectory and provided me with a pair of his own black boxer shorts to wear under my torn pants - to minimize the visibility of the "wardrobe malfunction". With 30 minutes to go, one of the guests located a needle and thread, and my wife did a rough sewing job and closed up the tear in my pants.
So, I have a rather unusual claim: I walked my beautiful daughter down the aisle at her wedding, and left with the preacher's underwear.
Life is endlessly funny and perverse!
So many better men, a few of them friends, are dead. And a thousand thousand slimy things live on, and so do I.
May 12th, 2015 at 7:41:15 PM
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That's a great wedding story. I bet it becomes part of the family lore for many years. Felicitations!
If the House lost every hand, they wouldn't deal the game.
May 12th, 2015 at 8:34:58 PM
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I respect the clergyman who gave freely, even from his underwear stash.
"Rule No.1: Never lose money. Rule No.2: Never forget rule No.1." -Warren Buffett on risk/return
May 17th, 2015 at 2:18:12 AM
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I'm sure they have an excess of stashed underwear. I'm surprised they found any mens sizes.Quote: surrender88sI respect the clergyman who gave freely, even from his underwear stash.
♪♪Now you swear and kick and beg us That you're not a gamblin' man Then you find you're back in Vegas With a handle in your hand♪♪ Your black cards can make you money So you hide them when you're able In the land of casinos and money You must put them on the table♪♪ You go back Jack do it again roulette wheels turinin' 'round and 'round♪♪ You go back Jack do it again♪♪
May 17th, 2015 at 2:40:30 AM
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Quote: AxelWolfI'm sure they have an excess of stashed underwear. I'm surprised they found any mens sizes.
Thanks for the laugh of the day! Nothing's going to top this.
Many people, especially ignorant people, want to punish you for speaking the truth. - Mahatma Ghandi
