FrankScoblete
FrankScoblete
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October 18th, 2013 at 1:29:57 PM permalink
I HATE GHOSTS

America has a love affair with ghosts.

There are “true” television shows that use some kind of green light to see spirits while people run in and out of buildings claiming to have heard eerie sounds. “I heard something. Did you hear something?”

There are movies about ghosts. Books about ghosts. Internet web sites devoted to ghosts. Ghost tours in just about every city.

I even stayed at a B&B in Pennsylvania (Pineapple Hill) which was supposed to be one of the most haunted B&Bs in the United States. The owner had DVDs and books all about the ghosts that tromped through his establishment – he even said ghosts of horses riding through the living room.

I took a ghost tour in York, England, where ghostly Roman legions marched through parts of the city. In fact, you supposedly could only see them from the knees up since the ground was lower in the old days when the legions marched through the area.

When Halloween rolls around people put sheets up in their front yards pretending such are representations of ghosts.

What the hell is wrong with all of us? Why should we bother with ghosts? They are just about all – meaning each and every one of these spectral beings – stupid, fucking idiots.

There I said it. Ghosts are jackasses. Ooo, look, the image of the ethereal woman in a nightgown walks down the hall and goes through a wall. She does this every night. What the hell is wrong with this ghost? Doesn’t she have anything better to do? How about sitting down for a chat with the owners of the house and filling them (and us) in on what it’s like being dead?

Ghosts make noises; repeat idiotic actions “He must have died as he cowered from the murderer because when he appears he is always cowering.” Well, he’s dead, okay? No need to cower anymore. Just tell the damn police who killed you and be done with it. Instead every night for the rest of eternity this ghost just does the same crummy thing --- cowering.

Think of the brilliant people who have died and how great they could be as disincarnate spirits with so much time at their disposal. Albert Einstein was trying to figure out the essence of the universe; he wanted to share his findings with all of mankind. So what is his ghost doing? We haven’t heard from good old Albert since April 18, 1955 – which was the day he became a ghost.

What’s Einstein’s stupid ghost doing all this time? Combing his unruly hair? Trimming his mustache? Walking up and down a physics lab at Princeton University? How about the fact that his ghost has had over half a century to discover new stuff and share it with the rest of us – does he bother? No.

You can now see why I am irritated. Okay, let’s say ghosts do exist. Fine. You think William Shakespeare could write a few more plays? He’s had centuries to formulate them. How about this one? “Hamlet: The Other Side”? It could be made into a series on television. But Shakespeare has done zilch.

You know, if you go to mediums who claim to talk to the dead basically what happens is the following:

Medium: I am getting the sense of a woman.

Person: Could it be my Aunt?

Medium: Yes, I see a “c” or “d” somewhere associated with her.

Person: Yes, yes, she once made famous cookies. Oh my! It is my Auntie Anne!

Medium: She says she is fine.

Person: Great. Ask her if she has any new recipes for cookies. I’ve hit a hard time economically and could use an infusion of cash.

Medium: She is smiling and now slowly de-etherealizing.

Oh, too bad, no new recipes from dear old dead Auntie Anne. She probably doesn’t even know how to make cookies anymore. All she knows is how to say she is all right and then drift away. What’s the point of her damn existence?

So now you see my dilemma? I hate ghosts. They are annoying and serve absolutely no purpose whatsoever. I don’t want to know that Uncle Schmo is fine. I want to know what great things Uncle Schmo has discovered on the other side.

You know what we can do with ghosts? Ignore them until they have something meaningful to contribute to society.

In short, to hell with them.
FrankScoblete
FrankScoblete
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October 18th, 2013 at 2:17:23 PM permalink
Thanks for the emails. There is more to ghosts than what I wrote. More silliness.
EvenBob
EvenBob
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October 18th, 2013 at 4:58:53 PM permalink
Quote: FrankScoblete



So now you see my dilemma? I hate ghosts. They are annoying and serve absolutely no purpose whatsoever.



What purpose do you serve, Frank. Or anybody for that
matter. Ghosts go back as far as recorded history and
even further than that in folk tales. They're in every
culture, they exist every bit as much as you do.
"It's not called gambling if the math is on your side."
MathExtremist
MathExtremist
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October 18th, 2013 at 6:13:13 PM permalink
Quote: FrankScoblete

You know what we can do with ghosts? Ignore them until they have something meaningful to contribute to society.


That's an interesting bit of unwitting anthropocentrism. How do you know that ghosts don't have their own afterlife society, with its own value system, that elevates moaning or repeatedly passing through walls above contributing to human society? What makes you think contributing to human society is a worthwhile endeavor for any non-human (or post-human) in any event? I mean, there are plenty of actual humans that don't contribute to human society, so it only makes sense that even fewer post-humans would.

Before casting the first stone, you should invite some ghosts into your own glass house and see what you can do to make their post-lives better. How would you feel if you were trapped in some alternate dimension while your still-living ex-friends or neighbors were complaining about how scary and awful you were, and how you never did anything useful since you died, yet all the while none of them lifts a finger to help *you* achieve your post-life goals and dreams? Would your no-longer-beating heart be filled with generosity or contempt?

I am shocked. SHOCKED, I say. Have you no compassion at all?
"In my own case, when it seemed to me after a long illness that death was close at hand, I found no little solace in playing constantly at dice." -- Girolamo Cardano, 1563
FrankScoblete
FrankScoblete
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October 18th, 2013 at 9:41:26 PM permalink
You're right M.E.
FrankScoblete
FrankScoblete
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October 19th, 2013 at 8:59:41 AM permalink
Just got a call from someone on this site telling me he has a ghost in his house. Thing does basically the same thing once or twice a week. The ghost doesn't scare anyone. I asked him did he think the ghost had consciousness. He said no. It was more like a 3D movie.
scepticus
scepticus
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October 19th, 2013 at 9:36:37 AM permalink
Quote: FrankScoblete

Just got a call from someone on this site telling me he has a ghost in his house. Thing does basically the same thing once or twice a week. The ghost doesn't scare anyone. I asked him did he think the ghost had consciousness. He said no. It was more like a 3D movie.



Ain't human imagination wonderful ? Given a premise anything can be "proved". Ghosts , like religion , exist in some people's minds because they cannot bear the thought that there is nothing beyond this life . Their belief is bolstered by the fact that it cannot be disproved .
I don't believe in an afterlife but if there is one when my time comes I have a question .Do they have casinos there ?
MrV
MrV
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October 19th, 2013 at 11:00:51 AM permalink
I wonder if atheists believe in ghosts?

I'm an atheist and I don't.

An atheist holding such a belief would be internally contradicted.

I suspect the same folk who believe in god also might be found to believe in (hardy har har) "ghosts."
"What, me worry?"
FrankScoblete
FrankScoblete
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October 19th, 2013 at 12:27:53 PM permalink
Actually, Mr. V, I think an atheist could believe in ghosts or an afterlife. Rather than get into that here maybe when I return I'll lay it out.
rxwine
rxwine
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October 19th, 2013 at 12:57:02 PM permalink
Quote: FrankScoblete

Actually, Mr. V, I think an atheist could believe in ghosts or an afterlife.



Don't forget UFOs. But I think there is a problem with all of them from a evidence standpoint. (UFOs of alien control, not just unidentified objects)

Heck, it's possible to add something new, like say Higgs Boson particle. I guess you can also have a "maybe list" of things. Some people will only put man made climate change in the maybe category.

I do not put living gargoyles in the "maybe list", though I think they are cool and monstrous. Nor swamp monkey forest snow man like creatures.
There's no secret. Just know what you're talking about before you open your mouth.
EvenBob
EvenBob
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October 19th, 2013 at 1:05:16 PM permalink
Ghosts have been a part of every culture on earth
since there have been people on the planet. It's
not an urban myth, it's not something you have to
'believe in' like Santa. It's been accepted as reality
for millennia. Believing in it or not believing doesn't
change the reality.
"It's not called gambling if the math is on your side."
rxwine
rxwine
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October 19th, 2013 at 1:14:51 PM permalink
You don't believe in Santa? More evidence for Santa than most things. Of course he is elusive.

Myth and lies have been around forever too.
There's no secret. Just know what you're talking about before you open your mouth.
rxwine
rxwine
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October 19th, 2013 at 1:19:11 PM permalink
Just because you only get a lump of coal, no reason to hate on Santa. He sees all. He sees you when you're sleeping. He knows when you're awake.
There's no secret. Just know what you're talking about before you open your mouth.
MrV
MrV
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October 19th, 2013 at 3:09:46 PM permalink
I'd like to see the Fertittas promote a UFC bout between Santa and the Easter bunny.

*googles*

Ain't the Fetittas, but WTF:

ho ho ho
"What, me worry?"
Buzzard
Buzzard
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October 19th, 2013 at 3:59:43 PM permalink
Space aliens only show themselves to two assholes in a cornfield and ghost never appear before anyone with a decent camera.
I doubt both the intelligence and existence of both.
Shed not for her the bitter tear Nor give the heart to vain regret Tis but the casket that lies here, The gem that filled it Sparkles yet
DRich
DRich
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October 19th, 2013 at 8:37:36 PM permalink
I can not stand those ghost shows on TV, but sadly my wife loves them. Shortly I will be in Tonopah and staying at the "famous haunted" Mitzpah hotel.
It's amazing the things we will do for love.

Mitzpah Hotel
At my age, a "Life In Prison" sentence is not much of a deterrent.
EvenBob
EvenBob
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October 19th, 2013 at 8:50:45 PM permalink
We stayed at a haunted B&B in IN in 2005. The whole
area was spooky. It was Oct and the end of their
season and we were the only guests. It was Friday
and the whole family went to a HS football game and
we were alone in the house for hours. Strange things
happened, like a picture frame went flying off the dresser
all by itself and we heard voices and steps in the hallway
and nobody but us was in the house.

The next day at breakfast the owner embarrassingly admitted
that it was haunted and that's why they were selling it.
People get spooked in places like that and aren't returning
customers. Spooked the hell out of me.
"It's not called gambling if the math is on your side."
AxelWolf
AxelWolf
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October 19th, 2013 at 9:08:06 PM permalink
The others with Nicole Kidman was the best ghost movie ever great twist http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kuxMVYWbS4s

Now I can block this thread.
♪♪Now you swear and kick and beg us That you're not a gamblin' man Then you find you're back in Vegas With a handle in your hand♪♪ Your black cards can make you money So you hide them when you're able In the land of casinos and money You must put them on the table♪♪ You go back Jack do it again roulette wheels turinin' 'round and 'round♪♪ You go back Jack do it again♪♪

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