Joined: Dec 27, 2010
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January 12th, 2018 at 12:50:00 PM permalink
Quote: mason2386

I work in a prison. This is just my rambling after a bad day. I don't know the answer, nor do any of us. PTSD is a screwed up........ event. We have no clue how to treat it or understand it. Look at how Viet Nam veterans were treated upon return.

Forget a grain, please have the whole shaker on standby for this...

I've only felt PTSD twice, both I "cured" myself with little more than exposure therapy. Doesn't really seem like that's an option for you, so my ignorance forces me to encourage the medical route.

I live in a prison town. The prison pop equals that of our whole village. As such, I'm quite literally surrounded by CO's; we long timers have even begun referring to our street as "Government Row", as all the short timers that are here <20yrs are ALL CO transplants who moved closer to work, including several who I've grown up with. It's a f#$%ed up job. In fact, I can't think of a single one of those lifelong friends who I can even stand to be around. The stress and strife of that line of work has turned every single one of them into a serious drunk at best, and a hateful, spiteful, evil minded human being at worst. I can't figure out how there's not monthly mandatory mental screenings in those places. Anyway...

Reach out. And when you do (because you will, seriously) keep some things in mind. I'd offer firstly to wrap your head around this properly. Don't think a few sessions of talking or a new script is gonna be like a light switch (it might, but that's dangerous think). Instead view it as a project. KNOW that it's gonna go wrong, and it's not gonna work, and it's gonna make things worse, because much like physical rehab, the beginning is mostly a barrage of pain and frustration. To help power through that, have in your head from the start that this is a projected goal you aim to complete. You're gonna want that idea there to help battle back a case of the quits.

Second is just a reaffirmation that this is gonna be frustrating. Prepare to burn through a number of docs and perhaps even a number of meds. Having myself been through a number of head shrinkers spanning reasons from insanity to dependency, you're gonna find docs (people) that you don't mend with, those you kinda get put out by, and those you seriously want to punch dead in their stupid faces. They, whoever you have, is not nearly the only person there for you. No matter who work supplies, whomever whoever swears by, don't worry about that s#$%. Just go, and if the doc is a no talent ass clown, move on to the next. And that goes ditto for the meds, if any. What some people have sworn by has left me on the side of the street puking my guts out. What got someone off the couch damn near put me in the ground. What turns some into a melting zombie puts iron in my back and rocket fuel in my blood. Know this is a project that contains failure, do what needs be done to see that failure is a property of the goal and not the finish line.

Last is just a faith in self. It's scary easy, especially in a place like that, to lose...what am I trying to say?...to lose the proper filter. To lose seeing reality and instead seeing everything through the veil of gaol. To see how other CO's cope, to believe that's how it's done, and to follow suit. Don't let your only outlet, your only confidant, be from the inside. Speak to a cop, a preacher, a teacher, a soldier, a nurse, a child, even. Speak about coping and get ideas from those outside. Inside might be easier to do, but it's also a lot easier to fall into a "blind leading the blind" situation.

You know what needs be done. Your post is a start. Don't let it also be the end.

And good luck! Even us bats#$% crazy folk find our ways. It just takes a try.
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