Wavy70
Wavy70
Joined: Nov 3, 2009
  • Threads: 15
  • Posts: 907
March 17th, 2011 at 5:17:29 PM permalink
Quote: AZDuffman

Who called a name? As to sense of humor, you are the one who needed the point of a joke and why it wasn't political explained to you.

You had to use google to get your lame joke? Sad. Maybe you should google "Korean War" and learn when the shooting war ended?



It must be quite boring and lonely there huh?

Duff. Get over it. You are obsessed with me. You have no sense of humor and a weak grasp on history. That must be why you never replied to me attempting to explain the last century to you.

You explaining history is like Helen Keller giving driving instructions.

Have a good life or continue having the one you have. It does not matter to me.
I have a bewitched egg that I use to play VP with and I have net over 900k with it.
pacomartin
pacomartin
Joined: Jan 14, 2010
  • Threads: 649
  • Posts: 7895
March 17th, 2011 at 5:18:14 PM permalink
Q: How do you get a blonde out of a tree?
A: You wave at her

How do you keep a blonde busy? (see below)
How do you keep a blonde busy? (see above)


The blonde walks into a drugstore and asks the pharmacist for some bottom deodorant. The pharmacist, a little bemused, explains to the woman that they don''t sell anything called bottom deodorant, and never have. Unfazed, the blonde assures him that she has been buying the stuff from this store on a regular basis, and would like some more. "I''m sorry," says the pharmacist, "we don''t have any."
"But I always get it here," says the blonde.
"Do you have the container it comes in?"
"Yes!" says the blonde, "I will go and get it."
She returns with the container and hands it to the pharmacist, who looks at it and says to her, "This is just a normal stick of underarm deodorant."
The annoyed blonde snatches the container back and reads out loud from the container: "To apply, push up bottom."
Nareed
Nareed
Joined: Nov 11, 2009
  • Threads: 373
  • Posts: 11413
March 17th, 2011 at 5:35:29 PM permalink
Oh, please, if you're going to tell blond jokes, at least tell a good one. For example:

During a Q&A after an astronomy talk, a blond says "I understand how you figure out stellar compositions, their distance from Earth and what kinds of planets orbit them. But how do you figure out what the stars' names are?"

At a social function a blond is introduced to a Naval surgeon "Man!" She says. "You doctors really like to specialize, don't you?"


And I've yet to heard a funny Palin joke.
Donald Trump is a fucking criminal
timberjim
timberjim
Joined: Dec 5, 2009
  • Threads: 33
  • Posts: 398
March 17th, 2011 at 5:42:17 PM permalink
Quote: FarFromVegas

Not the funniest, but brief and semi-appropriate:

What's six inches long, has a bald head, and drives women wild?

A hundred-dollar bill.



I vote this one the funniest so far!!!
timberjim
timberjim
Joined: Dec 5, 2009
  • Threads: 33
  • Posts: 398
March 17th, 2011 at 5:44:40 PM permalink
Quote: zippyboy


"I think my new roommate is gay."
"Really? Why do you say that?"
"Coz I snuck in his room the other night and his dick tastes like shit."



OK - really sick, but I must admit I laughed while I gagged at the same time!
rxwine
rxwine
Joined: Feb 28, 2010
  • Threads: 163
  • Posts: 9565
March 17th, 2011 at 5:58:37 PM permalink
Quote: Wavy70

You explaining history is like Helen Keller giving driving instructions.



That reminds me: Why did Helen Keller scream?

Someone left a plunger in the toliet.
Quasimodo? Does that name ring a bell?
appistappis
appistappis
Joined: Mar 27, 2010
  • Threads: 1
  • Posts: 105
March 17th, 2011 at 8:07:13 PM permalink
I tell ya, I tell ya I get no respect.....I went to my proctologist and found out his hobby was photography..............he told me to bend over and say cheese.



rodney dangerfield
clarkacal
clarkacal
Joined: Sep 22, 2010
  • Threads: 42
  • Posts: 401
March 17th, 2011 at 8:21:21 PM permalink
I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately
needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my
gas with the beat of the music.

After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee,
and noticed that everybody was staring at me....

Then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod.
clarkacal
clarkacal
Joined: Sep 22, 2010
  • Threads: 42
  • Posts: 401
March 17th, 2011 at 8:29:04 PM permalink
A young brunette goes into the doctor's office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it.
"Impossible," says the doctor. "Show me."
She takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams in agony. She pushes her knee and screams, pushes her ankle and screams and so on it goes.
The doctor says, "You're not really a brunette are you?"
She says, "No, I'm really a blonde."

"I thought so," he says. "Your finger is broken."
Wavy70
Wavy70
Joined: Nov 3, 2009
  • Threads: 15
  • Posts: 907
March 17th, 2011 at 9:00:20 PM permalink
Let's just say the best joke ends with the punchline.

We call our act the Aristocrats.


You can Youtube it but not for the delicate.
I have a bewitched egg that I use to play VP with and I have net over 900k with it.

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