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| wildqat Member since: Nov 11, 2009
Threads: 4
Posts: 157 | I stole this from someone at Fark who, in turn, stole it from somewhere else (probably Something Awful): Quote: I love advice threads. I'm going to sum up every single advice thread Fark has ever had.
Ready?
Submitter: "Help! HELP! I'm stuck in a well!!!"
Farkers1-4: "Climb! Climb up and take our hands!"
Submitter: "I'm thinking I should dig... should I dig?"
Farker5: "NO! I was trapped in a well, and digging is a bad idea! Climb out!"
Farkers6-8: "We're lowering ropes! Take hold of a rope!"
Farker9: "I've even tied a harness to the end of this one!"
Submitter: "I can feel the ropes, but I don't want to hold onto them... should I dig?"
Farker10: "No! If you dig, you'll hit water, and then you'll be proper hosed. I should know, I almost drowned."
Submitter: "I dug a little bit just now, and I haven't hit water. I'm gonna keep digging..."
Farkers11-18: "No! Climb! Climb out!"
Submitter: "Guys, I'm seriously stuck in this well! Help! HELP!!!"
Farker19: "I was trapped in a well once. It took me two years, but I managed to build a climbing machine that pulled me to safety out of a well bucket and a pocket watch. I'm dropping the blueprints, extra buckets, and an assortment of pocket watches."
Farker20: "I've engineered a jet-pack that will rocket you to safety. Stay where you are and we'll lower it down!""
Submitter: "Thanks for your help, guys. I'm gonna keep digging. I'll find the Mines of Moria and I'll just walk to the surface."
**Farkers1-20 piss in the well**
Farker21: "Guys, seriously... stop peeing in the well."
People like OP are probably why the Wizard stopped taking relationship questions long ago. |
